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Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

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Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#381

Post by balabaster »

LeonM wrote: post #203

I've tried a number of dating websites in the past year, and all of them are like this. First and foremost: No matter how hard they try to hide it, the male/female balance on all straight dating sites is completely off. I'd say it's about 80% male. So most of them fill with fake accounts to get the balance backs. The matching algorithms don't really exist, they are extremely primitive and usually optimised for engage…

Google should do dating based on people's every day searches...

"Hey, we know you're both single, or at least looking for other partners. You're literally the only two people on earth that share this fascination, everyone else thinks it's weird and creepy. You should chat. Based on the personality profiles we've created for you both based on your search history, we think you'd make an amazing couple."

That could totally disrupt dating, it would be organic in a way that could actually work for relationship longevity and it would be based on things people are actually interested in rather than what they think they should present as being interested in to signal mates. It has the potential to be far more real than dating sites.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#382

Post by treis »

magduf wrote: post #368
missosoup wrote: post #365

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> women don't need it as much as men. This is only half the story. The full story goes: Women can choose who to date, men must compete. Men can choose who to marry, women must compete. Dating apps exclusively cater to category #1. This dynamic may or may not be creating an entire class of >25yo women who are unable to marry despite the desire to do so.

Sorry, I don't buy it. Maybe if you're in your 20s this is true, but for people in their 40s, there's tons of women on the dating sites all looking for husbands, and as a man I've had plenty of success finding women to date (not so much in finding someone I have any interest in marrying though; there aren't that many attractive women left in the US at this age (because Americans are fat), and the ones who are left ha…

>Maybe if you're in your 20s this is true, but for people in their 40s,

That's exactly the issue. Women ages 21-28ish are pursued by men ages 21-35ish. So there's more men chasing a smaller number of women.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#383

Post by jayalpha »

magduf wrote: post #368
missosoup wrote: post #365

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> women don't need it as much as men. This is only half the story. The full story goes: Women can choose who to date, men must compete. Men can choose who to marry, women must compete. Dating apps exclusively cater to category #1. This dynamic may or may not be creating an entire class of >25yo women who are unable to marry despite the desire to do so.

Sorry, I don't buy it. Maybe if you're in your 20s this is true, but for people in their 40s, there's tons of women on the dating sites all looking for husbands, and as a man I've had plenty of success finding women to date (not so much in finding someone I have any interest in marrying though; there aren't that many attractive women left in the US at this age (because Americans are fat), and the ones who are left ha…

"Sorry, I don't buy it. Maybe if you're in your 20s this is true, but for people in their 40s, there's tons of women on the dating sites all looking for husbands,"

Well, these women in her 40s rode the cock carousel far too long....

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#384

Post by derefr »

bluntfang wrote: post #379
abstractbarista wrote: post #335

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I love Bumble's concept because it attempts to complete what feminism espouses. Aren't we all about empowering women, and how we can all be capable in the jobs we do, and the lives we lead? It's a great thing and I believe in it. But... Women collectively stopped short of picking up an equal responsibility for initiating romantic or casual interest. As a guy, you are absolutely expected to make the first moves. That…

Are you trying to say that there's a responsibility for women to hit on you in order for feminism to not "stop short"?

Nobody owes me anything; but (single, lonely, would-really-like-a-partner) women might have a responsibility to strike up a conversation with somebody, somewhere, some of the time. Like a “good deed for the day” sort of thing, but a “fearless attempt to satisfy one’s own desires of-the-day” sort of thing. (Sort of in the mould of Rejection Therapy?)

Though I would say, since a lot of the reason women don’t seem to hit on men comes down to inculcated social anxiety from being raised to view strangers as unpredictable scary people who can only mean harm (a view which sticks around even in adulthood, long after it’s “helpful”; a view that boys seem to get along just fine never being burdened with), maybe the real responsibility here is on parents to... not do that. If that’s the case, I don’t know what to suggest for the generations of women that exist right now and have already been screwed up by being raised this way. (What do you do for the adults who were victims of foot-binding as children? Their feet just are that way now. And these women’s brains just are this way now, too.)

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#385

Post by TallGuyShort »

lone_haxx0r wrote: post #47

Do you think that an open source dating app or a decentralized dating protocol would be a good idea?

If you think that compounding the gender-skewed demographics of current dating apps with the similarly gender-skewed demographics of most open-source communities is a good idea.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#386

Post by jayalpha »

missosoup wrote: post #365
apexalpha wrote: post #217

There is only one universal law that applies to online dating, and that is: women don't need it as much as men. For women, online dating just doesn't make sense. Even on Tinder, where the ratio is kinda okay, women are bombarded with messages and likes. To the point that they can't even respond to everyone even if they wanted to. This means men are left with unresponsive women and just start to send cheaper pick up l…

> women don't need it as much as men. This is only half the story. The full story goes: Women can choose who to date, men must compete. Men can choose who to marry, women must compete. Dating apps exclusively cater to category #1. This dynamic may or may not be creating an entire class of >25yo women who are unable to marry despite the desire to do so.

Well, I can pick up women in bars you would not believe it. I could just tell a story from last week. Even I don't believe it. :-)

But online dating is tricky. There may be people who can pull it off but for me the real world is easier. Also many women look good on pics but the pics are old or photoshopped.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#387

Post by Fjolsvith »

AdrianB1 wrote: post #234
apexalpha wrote: post #217

There is only one universal law that applies to online dating, and that is: women don't need it as much as men. For women, online dating just doesn't make sense. Even on Tinder, where the ratio is kinda okay, women are bombarded with messages and likes. To the point that they can't even respond to everyone even if they wanted to. This means men are left with unresponsive women and just start to send cheaper pick up l…

I know a few women that use Tinder: they are alone, late thirties and never got anything serious out of Tinder, but they use it to reassure their attractiveness by the continuous flow of likes they get. It is a morale booster, nothing more.

I get quite a few daily follow requests on TikTok by women who are seeking a relationship. As I'm already happily married I don't respond, but its a big ego boost for me, and is reassuring that if my current relationship ever went south, I still have some attraction.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#388

Post by jayalpha »

balabaster wrote: post #381
LeonM wrote: post #203

I've tried a number of dating websites in the past year, and all of them are like this. First and foremost: No matter how hard they try to hide it, the male/female balance on all straight dating sites is completely off. I'd say it's about 80% male. So most of them fill with fake accounts to get the balance backs. The matching algorithms don't really exist, they are extremely primitive and usually optimised for engage…

Google should do dating based on people's every day searches... "Hey, we know you're both single, or at least looking for other partners. You're literally the only two people on earth that share this fascination, everyone else thinks it's weird and creepy. You should chat. Based on the personality profiles we've created for you both based on your search history, we think you'd make an amazing couple." That could tota…

Well, why would I want a partner with the same interests? To share one or two, great. But I can learn much more from a person that is very different compared to me.

This is why I think this clustering based on interests was always bullshit on dating sites. And this is why people use Tinder now.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#389

Post by paul7986 »

apexalpha wrote: post #217

There is only one universal law that applies to online dating, and that is: women don't need it as much as men. For women, online dating just doesn't make sense. Even on Tinder, where the ratio is kinda okay, women are bombarded with messages and likes. To the point that they can't even respond to everyone even if they wanted to. This means men are left with unresponsive women and just start to send cheaper pick up l…

Ummm average to cute to hot women yes. Though those women who fall below that threshold or further are not having any fun or getting same amount of love. I have some female friends who just gave up yet all their long term relationships they've had happened via the offline world.

Also Almost Every guy here is complaining about dating apps not working... I ask them how many women did you say nope to? Meaning we all are too damn picky ..men and women equally.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#390

Post by goatinaboat »

saddestcatever wrote: post #363
goatinaboat wrote: post #172

Earlier quoted context omitted.

potential matches were verified, including height, weight I am happily married now (met my wife through a mutual friend, the old fashioned way) so my experience of online dating may be obsolete but women on dating sites tend to be very specific about their partner’s height. And income, and what car he drives and a big shopping list of mainly physical and materialistic traits. If you could verify all of that you might…

> How you attract the men to your platform is up to you... Women. Period. If you have women, then men will come. And they'll jump through absolutely every hoop and hurdle to do so.

The population of men who fulfil one of these shopping lists and would subject themselves to this verification process is insignificant. They are in bars successfully pursuing women who don’t write shopping lists on dating websites.
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