361–370 of 434 posts
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Holding up the ridiculous edge case that almost never happens and needs reform -- rape victims that end up as a non-custodial parent and thus owing child support -- to prevent an honest discussion of the whole issue (with more common injustices but also complexity and nuance) sucks. It doesn't help us move forward and improve the world.
Ah yes, the thing that almost never happens but when it happens you deserved it.
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> I think I'm old enough now to confidently say that, yes: Happiness really does start from within. What does age have to do with it? You're one person. It's anecdotal data. I'm old enough now (5 years later) to confidently say that, yes: Quitting my last job really did make me happier.
Same in my case. I quit my first software job because it made me feel so meaningless and depressed. I was immediately happier. I quit my second job because they overworked me. Same result. I have less money now, but I don’t care. I’m much happier being where I am now. People underestimate just how much work life affects your entire life.
It would be interesting to see how cultural aspects affect this. In the West, it seems like so much of our life/identity is focused on our job. "What do you do for a living?" is one of the most common opening questions upon meeting someone. I wonder if the impact of work life on one's happiness more muted elsewhere.
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It's supposed to be about intellectual curiosity. Not questioning other people's life choices and giving unsolicited advice.
It's a little odd to me that you would seem to expect an article and discussion on something subject like "happiness" not to have personal accounts of their subjective experience.
By all means, people can say what makes them happy!
My point is that we have no grounds for criticizing another person's subjective experience or personal life choices, nor is that desirable as a goal for this website.
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> The important point is that the anecdotal observations do not apply universally. We are probably reading their comment somewhat differently. Because of the way they couched their statement as rooted in their personal experience, I assumed their were implying it was anecdotal and obviously not a generalizable, objective truth.
> I assumed their were implying it was anecdotal and obviously not a generalizable, objective truth. "I think I'm old enough now to confidently say that, yes: Happiness really does start from within."
As I already stated, I read the OP as if the latter. Despite the often pedantic nature of HN, there's a lot of room for nuance and interpretation human communication.
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It's a little odd to me that you would seem to expect an article and discussion on something subject like "happiness" not to have personal accounts of their subjective experience.
That's not what I said. It's an uncharitable interpretation of what I said. By all means, people can say what makes them happy! My point is that we have no grounds for criticizing another person's subjective experience or personal life choices, nor is that desirable as a goal for this website.
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That's not what I said. It's an uncharitable interpretation of what I said. By all means, people can say what makes them happy! My point is that we have no grounds for criticizing another person's subjective experience or personal life choices, nor is that desirable as a goal for this website.
Where do you think the OP was being criticizing? I did not see them say anyone was wrong, or making bad decisions. They even made sure to equivocate by saying there's nothing wrong with trying to change one's circumstances.
Author here. I posted this late last night (BST) and I’m shocked to wake and see it was so heavily read and discussed. Thank you everyone! The post received some justifiable criticism for making it sound like I’m about to disappear in to the mountains to live like a hermit in a poorly thought out, idealistic middle finger to society. In reality the change I’m making is to move to a much smaller place where I still ha…
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You spend most of your life at work (at least in the US). 24 hours in a day. 8 of them spent working. 1 hour for lunch. ~2 hours getting ready for work/sleep each day. 8 hours for sleep... that leaves you with ~5 hours per day, but you also have to do chores around the house, maybe pickup/dropoff kiddos, commute (if you don't work from home), and cook dinner and clean up afterwards. If you have 2 hours a day to yours…
> You spend most of your life at work (at least in the US) Where else in the world people dont spens most of their lives at work?
I've worked in some manufacturing domains where unions negotiated the ability to essentially opt-out of large amounts of the work year. There were people who would take off Nov-Feb to essentially focus on families during the holidays, hunting, etc.
I think, to a certain extent, the fact that we're highly productive yet have an expectation to work constantly is a measure of our value systems. (Obviously, highly context and culturally dependent.)
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Where do you think the OP was being criticizing? I did not see them say anyone was wrong, or making bad decisions. They even made sure to equivocate by saying there's nothing wrong with trying to change one's circumstances.
I'm talking about your comment: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=34408305
How would you say the OP adds to the discussion if what they say, almost by definition, is meant to shut down discussion? Or is your issue with pointing out HN guidelines? It feels like you're reading way more into my point than was actually there if you think I was criticizing anything related to their life decisions.
It's fine with me if someone has that point of view. But I don't think a forum like HN, which is supposed to be about fostering dialogue, is the best place to share it, or at least share it in that manner.
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> I assumed their were implying it was anecdotal and obviously not a generalizable, objective truth. "I think I'm old enough now to confidently say that, yes: Happiness really does start from within."
If I had said, "I've lived in enough places to conclude that southern California is really the best place" would you read that as me making a universal claim or simply relaying my subjective determination? As I already stated, I read the OP as if the latter. Despite the often pedantic nature of HN, there's a lot of room for nuance and interpretation human communication.
"Bluntly, every person I know who's expressed these kinds of sentiments is guilty of the same mistake: [living outside southern California]."