I can totally relate (though I've had far less balls than you so far). I mostly relate to the the commute but I did post a project about a year ago and though I did see sniping like you speak of the responses i got were actually pretty helpful but I do know what you mean as I've seen it like we all have on other posts.
The things I admire about you posting this most are:
1. You had the balls to not only criticize this place but actually criticize it despite the fact I'm sure you know a ton of people will say your criticism is only your experience or a common newbie mistake (I've seen that said to newbies and veterans alike) or some other sort of response full of denial and meant to shut you up.
2. You criticized despite, I'm sure, knowing many will think you had your feelings hurt due to the response on your projects and are now coming back to whine
For the record, I don't think either of those things are true of you. I totally hear you. I'd also add that this has become a place where group think is acceptable and encourage. HN is now a hive mind. On HN, if you believe... that file sharing sites really are just a place used mostly to download copyrighted media and that's wrong then you are an enemy of freedom around here. If you believe that people who are pirating (as in downloading via channel unauthorized by creator without paying) is wrong and hurts the developer you're an enemy of freedom, free software, and HN. If you use PHP you're not a real developer and you should be mocked. If you like anything about PHP you are dumb and should be mocked. Then we have the classic flame wars that anyone who knows HN would expect to never see here but they do. Often. Like Jobs v. Stallman, Windows v. Mac, Vi v. Emacs, and so on. Really?
And everyone is the smartest person here. Everyone. You could cure AIDS and some guy will come along and talk about how it should've been done faster by doing XYZ. The titles on submissions from many regulars have also gone downhill. We used to get things like "Why technique X helps Y in use case Z". Now we get a lot of arrogant "If you don't do X the way I describe in this post then you don't deserve to live". Okay, it's actually more like "If you do X then you're doing it wrong" or some such.
I wonder why. Maybe we've grown to the point where the sense of community is a little strained, people want to feel smart like all the other smart people, and so now colleagues have become competitors. When that happens what you get is jealousy and instead of helpful suggestions you get sniping because the person is thinking "shit, I have nothing a,axing to contribute so how do I save face and still look smart?". The answer is by bringing everyone else down.
Maybe we've gone from a community of mostly doers to a community of a minority of doers and a majority of spectators. It's just like sports in that case. When you're out in a social setting and a game is on everyone knows better than the coach and players how to play the game. It even becomes acceptable because by nature spectators and players both have roles to play. The players are the "anointed ones", the "professionals", who do things mere mortals cannot (or maybe even should not?) and their job is to play for the benefit (maybe a bad choice of words but along the lines of "benefit") of the spectators. The spectators then, since they have to leave the playing to the professionals, are left to either be delighted when things are going good or criticize when things go bad. The more the spectator longs to be a player but doesn't (either through a false belief that they can't or shouldn't because they weren't "chosen", or because they just don't have the balls to), the harsher their criticism becomes and the more vocal they become.
Maybe that's what has happened around here. I know I for one have been quite intimidated and jealous of others. I often feel what I can contribute cannot match what others are building so I keep it to myself. And when I see a few harsh critiques of something it becomes easy for me to pile on. I'm not above it but I am self aware enough to spot it in myself.
I speak as ive been here a while because I have (relatively speaking of course). I had a 400-something day old account hell banned a couple months ago because of what's happened to HN. I had the wrong opinion and was punished. Even before I created an account I lurked for a year and back then HN was still very intimidating but also far more welcoming and constructive. I really think anyone who is going to trot out the old "oh, this opinion comes around every now and then" or the "that's a common fallacy" argument is in denial. I'd like to see HN redeem itself or go out on top like Jordan (the first time he retired).
One last thing: for what it's worth, yeah HN has gotten a little sucky, but it's still awesome and very redeemable.