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Quitting the rat race

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Re: Quitting the rat race

#351

Post by bumby »

lapcat wrote: post #207
bumby wrote: post #202

Earlier quoted context omitted.

If it wasn’t clear enough from my post, I’m implying you are reading too much into the literal meaning of the age part of the comment. As the HN guidelines say, we should be trying to take the most generous interpretation possible.

> I’m implying you are reading too much into the literal meaning of the age part of the comment. I'm not. In fact my previous comment would still be valid if the line "What does age have to do with it?" were omitted. The important point is that the anecdotal observations do not apply universally.

>The important point is that the anecdotal observations do not apply universally.

We are probably reading their comment somewhat differently. Because of the way they couched their statement as rooted in their personal experience, I assumed their were implying it was anecdotal and obviously not a generalizable, objective truth.

Re: Quitting the rat race

#352

Post by bradlys »

bradly wrote: post #176
juve1996 wrote: post #107

This post really ruffled some feathers on here, talking about how he can't find happiness out there, you can't find happiness externally, it's all internal, he can only do this because he makes money, etc. It's amazing how many people simply want to tear others down, I think, deep down, many wish they could do the same as this man.

When I told my family and friends my plan to leave my great FAANG job to retire early very few of the responses were positive. It was really disheartening after working so hard for so many years towards that goal.

Did you leave where you were living and retire to some other area?

Most family and friends I’ve spoken to are completely fine and generally supportive.

Even when I quit my $1m/yr job, people were like - “if it feels like prison and is making you miserable - do it. Life is too short.” I took up another job at a 60% paycut. That turned out to be terrible too. So now I’ve not been working since June and traveling and living in different areas. They’re all supportive cause they’re like, “you’re living the dream. No responsibilities. You have money to live off of. Do it!”

It’s hard to imagine finding anyone who isn’t supportive of retiring early and is actually your friend.

Re: Quitting the rat race

#353

Post by notch656c »

defterGoose wrote: post #344
ciphol wrote: post #331

Earlier quoted context omitted.

If you're no longer going to be contributing income, what will you contribute instead to the family? Nobody respects or appreciates a freeloader as a partner. But if something other than money is contributed, it's more likely to work.

Holy God it's not like being mentally present, raising kids, or just doing chores around the house is valuable to your family. /s Such a toxic, capitalistic, misandronistic mindset.

For half the assets + 20-25% of a top engineers salary (court imposed child support) you can hire an au pair to do your bitch work for half the week and still probably have money left over to buy dinner for a fuck-boy/girl on the side. Probably can even find a new person to stay with and take advantage of dual income life while availing yourself of the 20-25% income stream of the high earner.

Economically I don't see the advantage to staying together with a high earner that quits their job. Take half, plus the 20% support (they'll have to work now because they'll be tossed in jail if they don't pay, and imputed income will be at their high professional salary), then you can find a new person who doesn't work outside the house and let them contribute their half with chores. The sooner the divorce the better as they'll have to go back to work after the judge's order. Versus just having a person who doesn't work outside the house without the 20% of an engineer salary income stream.

This all sounds really fucked up but realize over 18 years we're talking about possibly $1M+ (tax-free) on the table. People will do some crazy shit for a million dollars.

Re: Quitting the rat race

#354

Post by tanseydavid »

dylan604 wrote: post #200
themitigating wrote: post #183

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Just to note, as middle aged person, the "who gives a .." might not be from a deeper wisdom due to age but cynicism.

maybe true. but for me personally, i just realized that the constant comparison of what i have vs what other people have is just dumb. as long as what i have makes me happy and the pursuit of those things isn't causing me to make bad decisions about other things, then i'm okay with it. it might be why i'm so sickened by all the ad tech as ultimately it's keying in on people's FOMO. it might sound embarrassing to admi…

"The things you own end up owning you." -Tyler Durden

Re: Quitting the rat race

#355

Post by lapcat »

bumby wrote: post #351
lapcat wrote: post #207

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> I’m implying you are reading too much into the literal meaning of the age part of the comment. I'm not. In fact my previous comment would still be valid if the line "What does age have to do with it?" were omitted. The important point is that the anecdotal observations do not apply universally.

> The important point is that the anecdotal observations do not apply universally. We are probably reading their comment somewhat differently. Because of the way they couched their statement as rooted in their personal experience, I assumed their were implying it was anecdotal and obviously not a generalizable, objective truth.

> I assumed their were implying it was anecdotal and obviously not a generalizable, objective truth.

"I think I'm old enough now to confidently say that, yes: Happiness really does start from within."

Re: Quitting the rat race

#356

Post by bumby »

taneq wrote: post #257
bumby wrote: post #192

Earlier quoted context omitted.

“No one is going to talk me into…” is shorthand for “I’m not open to any other ideas that don’t align with my preconceived notions.” It’s not terribly productive on a site whose guidelines try to foster an open and curious conversation.

Did you read what came after “talk me into”? I think a preconceived notion that you want to make the most of your life isn’t something that you should necessarily be open to being talked out of.

>preconceived notion that you want to make the most of your life isn’t something that you should necessarily be open to being talked out of.

Fair enough when it's just a vague, general sentiment like "making the most of your life." What is probably worth being open minded about is how you define the objective function that maximizes that potential. It might be a little odd if I defined "making the most out of my life" in the same way I did when I was six (or even 16) years old.

Re: Quitting the rat race

#357

Post by bumby »

tjrDL6MjB2Zwwa wrote: post #316
bumby wrote: post #192

Earlier quoted context omitted.

“No one is going to talk me into…” is shorthand for “I’m not open to any other ideas that don’t align with my preconceived notions.” It’s not terribly productive on a site whose guidelines try to foster an open and curious conversation.

[flagged]

The point being made is that HN is meant for discussion; so I'd assume you wouldn't see any value in discussing that topic on the forum.

I think it's fair to say there are certain principles (like the idea that a minor cannot consent to a sexual relationship with an adult, or that slavery is a moral wrong) can be viewed as immutable (or, at least immutable within a certain cultural context).

However, germane to the discussion in this thread, I don't think the definition of "happiness" is one of those immutable principles.

Re: Quitting the rat race

#358

Post by bumby »

anonreeeeplor wrote: post #265
bumby wrote: post #192

Earlier quoted context omitted.

“No one is going to talk me into…” is shorthand for “I’m not open to any other ideas that don’t align with my preconceived notions.” It’s not terribly productive on a site whose guidelines try to foster an open and curious conversation.

I have co founded a $100+ million valuation startup. I am not in the top 50%. I am not in the top 80%. I am in the very very very top 0.5%. If you have worked in most tech jobs, at large or medium sized companies, you have not met people like me. I took risks. Major ones. I left comfort.

I'm not sure what point you're alluding to here. I've met lots of people, some of whom I'd say took much greater risks than starting a tech company. I'm not sure if you're conflating conventional notions of monetary success with what the article is about, which is happiness.

Is your point that in order to take risks to be happy you need to be so cock-sure as to be closed minded? I tend to disagree and would probably characterize that as reckless as opposed to taking informed risks.

Re: Quitting the rat race

#359

Post by horns4lyfe »

supportlocal4h wrote: post #289
BaseballPhysics wrote: post #67

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Bluntly, every person I know who's expressed these kinds of sentiments is guilty of the same mistake: externalizing their happiness. They inevitably move, only to find the new place they're in sucks, just in different ways. Or they find another job, but just discover more things they hate there. Or they find a new partner, only to discover a new set of annoyances. The same psychology leads people to think they'll be…

These are very good points to ponder seriously. You can change your circumstances in another way. Reduce your expenses despite all the money that's coming in. Then find something important to you. It feels like it should be something altruistic. Funnel money to it. But also funnel your time and energy. Buy some property in Detroit and build a safe house there. Fly in once a month to be involved, actually forming conc…

If you’re talking about FTX, their version of altruism was donating vast sums to political parties. I would call that more power-seeking than altruism, whatever the media calls it.

Re: Quitting the rat race

#360

Post by bumby »

lapcat wrote: post #203
bumby wrote: post #192

Earlier quoted context omitted.

“No one is going to talk me into…” is shorthand for “I’m not open to any other ideas that don’t align with my preconceived notions.” It’s not terribly productive on a site whose guidelines try to foster an open and curious conversation.

It's supposed to be about intellectual curiosity. Not questioning other people's life choices and giving unsolicited advice.

It's a little odd to me that you would seem to expect an article and discussion on something subject like "happiness" not to have personal accounts of their subjective experience.
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