Probably because you can now play counterstrike in the browser. :)
You have a point
Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows
351–360 of 740 posts
Re: Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows
#352Earlier quoted context omitted.
That's not how it's worked out in any society where family formation has been limited for large numbers of young men. The research on the calming effect of family formation on young men is very straightforward: when a population of young men doesn't have the opportunity to form families, _they_ become the powder keg. It's true at multiple scales, from individual criminality to societal unrest.
So, "give us families, or we'll do crime and destabilize society"? Sounds like mental health problems are even more rampant than we guessed. We should probably handle that.
Oh got it, you're one of those people who's unable to reason about the way things work without becoming overcome with emotion and desperately cramming the conversation into a simple-minded framework of "who's to blame so we can get mad at them".
I'm not really interested in that kind of conversation, thanks though!
Re: Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows
#353Earlier quoted context omitted.
Marriage is also becoming stratified by economic class. Poorer Americans used to marry at the same rate as wealthy Americans, but that changed in 2008. Since then poorer Americans are significantly less likely to get married than their richer peers.
It's also interesting to see the fertility rate by income. Basically only bottom 20% and top 1% of US are above replacement rate. I can't find the graph I wanted to show this, but this one is pretty close: https://twitter.com/cschmert/status/993934031174725632
Lots of people who are not in the top 1% and bottom 20% are in cities with severely constrained housing supply
Re: Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows
#354They buried the lede here. > Sexual activity was largely unchanged among unmarried women, along with no notable decline among gay men, researchers reported. Basically sex is following the pattern of wealth. Men as a group aren't having less sex, instead there's a winner take all effect where a small number of men are having a lot of sex with a lot of women while a large number of men are having little to no sex. It'l…
I'm a high earner in tech like I imagine many people on the forum, and also like many people on the forum my life is super busy. My last relationship ended really badly took like two years to get over it and then I was suddenly really busy and I've kept being really busy as my titles have changed and my personal interest in starting my own business has increased etc etc and now we're in a pandemic. I'd argue that the…
I think these things are fair points for relationships, but the post is about sex in general, and busy schedules don’t tend to affect hook ups much.
Re: Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows
#355Earlier quoted context omitted.
I'm a high earner in tech like I imagine many people on the forum, and also like many people on the forum my life is super busy. My last relationship ended really badly took like two years to get over it and then I was suddenly really busy and I've kept being really busy as my titles have changed and my personal interest in starting my own business has increased etc etc and now we're in a pandemic. I'd argue that the…
> I'd argue that there's a whole group of young guys who are just so freaking busy and not really in a place where they can meet a bunch of single women ... I'm not sure this is new? I also wonder how large is the group is, and whether this category is as applicable outside of tech (which is a small fraction of the population in my mind). I suspect it's not that large, and groupings by other categories discussed else…
I would suggest that the be apart is that they don't marry out tradition/social norms anymore. They just stay single, because it's more okay to stay single for longer + no desire for kids
Re: Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows
#356Earlier quoted context omitted.
That's not how it's worked out in any society where family formation has been limited for large numbers of young men. The research on the calming effect of family formation on young men is very straightforward: when a population of young men doesn't have the opportunity to form families, _they_ become the powder keg. It's true at multiple scales, from individual criminality to societal unrest.
So, "give us families, or we'll do crime and destabilize society"? Sounds like mental health problems are even more rampant than we guessed. We should probably handle that.
> Sounds like mental health problems are even more rampant than we guessed. We should probably handle that.
Other than generalized chemical castration I don't see how you could eliminate the "problem" of most of the male population unfulfilled sex drive. For all its problems and unfairness, patriarchal society provides an answer to that problem, if an ugly one.
Re: Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows
#357They buried the lede here. > Sexual activity was largely unchanged among unmarried women, along with no notable decline among gay men, researchers reported. Basically sex is following the pattern of wealth. Men as a group aren't having less sex, instead there's a winner take all effect where a small number of men are having a lot of sex with a lot of women while a large number of men are having little to no sex. It'l…
There's a large amount of debate over this issue. Whatever your opinion may be, the study doesn't seem to agree with it: https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jamanetworkopen/fullarticle... Look at the chart for number of sexual partners reported by men and women by year. Honestly just read the study. It has data on many of the issues people are speculating about, including porn and what not. If you were to believe that a…
This is exactly what you would expect if the OP's hypothesis is correct. 3 partners really isn't that many. The study should have looked at something like 0, 1-5, 5-19, 20-99, 100+ or something like that. It is not capturing the top end at all.
Re: Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows
#358Earlier quoted context omitted.
It seems possible to me that creatures that are denied their biological imperative can develop some very aggressive behaviours. If 80+% of men in society are angry, I'd be a bit scared.
I would be scared to date them. Dating partner that angry when denied what he wants means you will get abused, either verbally or physically and likely both. And given strength difference between women and men, it is safer to be alone then with someone who is into outrage at 24 for not having partner yet.
I think people become more human the more you treat them as humans that can grow. If you see others through the lens of risk assessment, you'll surely see lots of risk.
Re: Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows
#359Earlier quoted context omitted.
Young man here. "Ladies first" is flat out weird to me, the only time I ever use it is jokingly with my girlfriend, sisters, or close female friends. I'm not sure if I'd go so far as to call it sexist, but it's an odd thing to say for sure.
its a nice gesture. whats the problem? back in Germany, only 10 years ago, women were super happy about it. now i am getting called a sexist. times change
With the Titanic it was "Women and children in the life boats first" (setting aside massive lack of preparation for the event and locking 3rd class people below decks - despicable). Historically it would seem that this gesture is not based upon the presumption that women are weaker or inferior but are to be treated with greater respect. The "weaker vessel" in Bible language has been interpreted as being the nicer/finer of God's creation. The men were to drown first.
Re: Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows
#360Earlier quoted context omitted.
I think this is exactly right. Apps like Tinder that normalized online "dating" (before the apps it was much less common among younger people) have allowed the "apex predator" men with good jobs/looks/personalities to have sex on demand with virtually unlimited numbers of women. This has also been made possible because a lot more women are now willing to be in non-exclusive sexual relationships at the beginning when…
The problem is most men go after women 18-25 years old. They don't want the women that are 25+. This is important because it is often men who select which women to go after. Women typically don't go after men in terms of dating selection.
Depending on the purpose and their age.
18-25 is a lot of fun, but if you want a relationship you either have to find a trust fund baby or become a sugar daddy which most men don’t want.
Hookups and casual dating with someone that is just getting by is fine proper relationships is much harder.
My current partner is just under 7 years younger than me (I’ve just turned 34) she has good enough of a career that if we can go to Tenerife or Ibiza on a whim for a weekend we don’t have to plan for it and even if I end up spending a bit more money she doesn’t feel like she’s selling herself out and I don’t feel exploited.
Even after 1 year in a relationship there is a big difference between buying a girl a drink or paying for dinner and paying for a flight and a hotel.
The good ones won’t be comfortable with the latter and you probably don’t want to get into a relationship with those who would expect you too.