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The upstream cause of the youth mental health crisis is the loss of community

afterbabel.com

341–350 of 824 posts

Re: The upstream cause of the youth mental health crisis is the loss of community

#341

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I don't think so; the streets are paid for by whatever vehicular taxes, the sidewalks are paid for by property taxes, there's income and sales taxes for additional financing; charging for parking is just adding salt to the wound. In fact... hear me out. It might be that, those that own the paid private parking lots in high traffic areas exacerbate the parking issues in contested areas, creating pressure on free parki…

> and voilá, no more free parking anywhere. Well... yes, that is precisely what's needed to wean America off its unhealthy dependence on cars. Come over here to Europe, visit our cities where you can actually walk on a sidewalk, where you can live without a car just fine because everything you need can be reached safely on foot, by bike or with public transport.

> Well... yes, that is precisely what's needed to wean America off its unhealthy dependence on cars.

HIGHLY disagree. If you want people off cars, you need to give them an alternative. Granted, I love cars. I would have cars whether I needed one or not, but I know I'm absolutely 100% in the minority on that issue, and like, when I say I would have cars either way, I mean fun cars. I wouldn't keep and maintain vehicles to just get around in my daily life if I didn't have to. I'd very much prefer to have just the vehicles I actually enjoy, and probably one truck and trailer to get around to tracks.

Most people don't like cars and don't like driving which is why most people drive like shit. It's a chore, a required to-do item on the way to doing something they actually want to do.

Re: The upstream cause of the youth mental health crisis is the loss of community

#342

Earlier quoted context omitted.

When I'm out at a sit-down restaurant, I always make a mental note of everyone who has their phone out on the table. It's usually 50-50. Not necessarily using them, but within view, as if they're waiting for something else instead of prioritizing the people who took the time to be physically around them in the same place and time. No wonder lots of people feel disconnected. They forgot how to connect in even the most…

Not only that, but also in people's hands. I've seen on many occasions a couple sitting together at a two-seat table, obviously they're together for dinner, both silently scrolling on their smartphones. Not even saying a word to each other. It's eerie and creepy, like something out of Black Mirror. Last time I pointed this out on HN, most repliers were either defending this behavior or being sarcastic with "Well why…

> I've seen on many occasions a couple sitting together at a two-seat table, obviously they're together for dinner, both silently scrolling on their smartphones.

Once upon a time, being together without having to talk was a measure of closeness. Relationships that achieved this were venerated.

That ideal aside: Proximity itself nurtures trust and feelings of safety.

It seems sad that we could miss examples of bonding because they don't fit our relationship model.

Re: The upstream cause of the youth mental health crisis is the loss of community

#343

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'm in my 30s but I'm feeling this so hard. Growing up we used to have these kid/youth centres that were run by local Catholic organizations. We used to hang out there after school. Ostensibly the point was that there'd be 30 minutes of catechism doctrine, but we didn't really care about that. To us it was just a the place where everyone would be. I miss that so much. A place where you can just go and meet people you…

You don't like being drunk that much, or like climbing, but, were your parents really that Catholic? We, as humans, need a dream to build towards, be in service of, and find our place in. What are we doing here and why are we doing it? For those of us who haven't figured it out yet, attaching to someone else's purpose gives us one and we don't have to figure it out ourselves. You need to find religion, just don't cal…

The world religion comes from Latin meaning ‘to bond with ritual’

It’s not very smart to not have a ritual of community building in one’s life.

Re: The upstream cause of the youth mental health crisis is the loss of community

#345

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Hm. In Iowa it's thought that 10% of the customers of liquor stores buy 90% of the product moved through the door. That's not 10X the general population. That's 81X. One in nine drink 9X what nine other people do. So, you have a relationship with alcohol, it's likely not a healthy one. It's addiction, all the way down.

I'm confused, you paint a picture in which the majority drink moderately and then say "likely not healthy" but in your example 90% of the customers, the vast majority, don't have an unhealthy relationship with alcohol. So if you have a relationship with alcohol it is most likely a healthy one, and it's "addiction all the way down" for... a minority.

Yeah, well, that majority is likely buying alcohol for events, for celebrations. Not so much a 'relationship with alcohol' as a party favor. Don't drink anything at all the rest of the year.

You have a favorite drink, a regular bar, a liquor store that knows you - you are probably one of the ten percent. Believe it or not, most of us don't go to a bar most months of the year.

Re: The upstream cause of the youth mental health crisis is the loss of community

#346

Well, yes, we've doubled down on mediating social interactions through economic relationships. Most of the interactions adults have in their lives are with or in the framing of economic relations. Homes, are being invaded with tablets and mobile devices which bring along with them framing interactions as economic relations through ad and consumer frames. Workplaces are inherently settings of economic relations, and t…

Professor Michael Rosenfeld at Stanford does research on how heterosexual couples in the US meet ( https://web.stanford.edu/~mrosenfe/ ). In 1940, over 50% met via friends or family. About 36% met at school. In 2021, about 20% met via friends or family. About 10% met at school. Over 50% met online. So the majority of US couples are now meeting via profit-maximizing corporations. He has a 2019 paper on this (and it ha…

There has also been about a 70% drop in number of marriages since the 50s.

Re: The upstream cause of the youth mental health crisis is the loss of community

#347

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> I've noticed an uptick recently of large brands to start referring to themselves as "The [Brand] Community" I don't think I've ever seen that. What I have seen is non-sponsored people referring to "the [brand] community" or "the [product] community" as a shorthand way of saying they discuss brand or product with other people with that shared interest on a dedicated Discord server or forum. The Sega community, the F…

The official forum for SAP users is called the "SAP Community"[0]. I've seen it in other corporate places too, but this was the first occurrence which came to mind. [0] https://community.sap.com/

and the apple support community: https://discussions.apple.com/welcome

Re: The upstream cause of the youth mental health crisis is the loss of community

#348
post #162

The books the authors cite are great and worth reading. Some personal observations: - The USA lacks a unified cultural identity now. There are lots of reasons for this. But, it's considered taboo to express a love of the USA - which hurts our community + culture. - People put a lot of effort into work, and work is becoming more transactional. No more "life-long employment with the buddies" kind of situation. - Americ…

> it's considered taboo to express a love of the USA American here. First-generation immigrant. Came from Germany at age 5. This misses a crucial part of the problem. It is considered taboo to express a love of the USA in certain social circles . In others, it is considered taboo not to express a love of the USA. The problem is that the two sides have very different ideas of what "loving the USA" means. Among the fir…

Pledging allegiance to the flag is a product of late 19th century sentiments that tie back to the US Civil War. This article has some backstory: https://www.bostonreview.net/articles/jack-david-eller-pledg...

Re: The upstream cause of the youth mental health crisis is the loss of community

#349
post #87

Earlier quoted context omitted.

There's also a weird mistake among young people in thinking of Republicans versus Democrats as enemies to be shunned rather than the "loyal opposition" who just happen to have a different perspective. Becoming a political tribalist cuts out about half your social opportunities.

I respect that viewpoint and would be happy to adopt it in different times. But it's not as simple as political tribalism. For example - Several of my close friends are trans. For the last decade or so, Republicans have been viciously attacking trans people and several states are actively taking away their rights. The entire right wing media ecosystem uses every chance they can to demonize trans people in the new cul…

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Re: The upstream cause of the youth mental health crisis is the loss of community

#350
post #330

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Parent poster doesn’t want to have to drink to socialize. And bar meets are just that. It’s actually a huge problem in society. Ever stream something or go to the cinema ? What does it show you? You’re happy => you drink to celebrate. You’re sad => drink out of sorrow. You want to hang out with friends => you go for drinks. DEFCON for example perpetuates that same behavior. Sure, one part is loss of community, but th…

In most communities there's no longer much social stigma against going to a bar/pub and ordering non-alcoholic beverages. The latest non-alcoholic beers are actually pretty good. (I do understand that the environment itself can be difficult for recovering alcoholics.)

I used to go out not-drinking with my coworkers (I've been a teetotaler my entire life). The place we went to had free refills for sodas so I downed half a dozen glasses of Fanta while my coworkers were paying $3-$5 a beer. Seems ridiculous to me how much people pay for alcohol.
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