Hacker News Board Hacker News, browsed like a classic message board
Live data from Hacker News

Facts about throwing good parties

atvbt.com

Post reply on HN
Print view View original

331–340 of 431 posts

Re: Facts about throwing good parties

#331

Post by swiftcoder »

vasco wrote: post #319
robocat wrote: post #220

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You are just being judgy. Dong think of it as rules, think of it as someone explaining etiquette. That is hard to write down without sounding weird. I bet you are oversimplifying how good parties are created in your own culture. If you tried to write down the actual etiquette it would come out sounding weird to us all. Humans create odd rituals and expectations about everything social. You only really notice it when…

You're being downvoted probably because hn is too sensitive to you calling me judgy but you have a good point. It's hard to write about this without sounding weird, and I guess if I wanted to write about what makes a good party I'd also sound weird. I guess my point was more about the mindset of how you even think about the thing. For me it just "is", and that's a good part of why it works. I wouldn't want to think e…

I don't know about the Netherlands, but having spent a bit of time in Germany, you may be underestimating the mount of party planning that is ingrained into the various European cultures.

From an outside perspective, even fairly casual German gatherings feel like they are orchestrated with a level of precision that would do a military campaign proud - but the Germans I was with don't really seem to notice this (likely because they all already know their roles, and to them it's just part of their culture)

Re: Facts about throwing good parties

#332

Post by Esophagus4 »

knuppar wrote: post #83

Being brutally honest, I wouldn't be too keen to attend a party from someone that writes up about their 21 party facts lol. This sounds more like a meticulous plan to maximize human socialization than an actually just fun party :)

Casual hangs are definitely fun, but there's also a lot of fun to being at a bigger "party" or "event."

It's everything from the organization of the space and the flow of people during the night, to the mix of invitees, to possibly having some kind of gimmick there for people to connect over and for the shy people who need some social lubricant (like palm readers, a caricature artist, etc), to the music, to the decor, to the food, to people hired to help pass out the food, to the theme / dress, to the interlude that brings people together (like a vote / contest)...

When done well, it looks effortless, and it can be really fun to attend!

Re: Facts about throwing good parties

#333

Post by johnnyanmac »

IanCal wrote: post #283
teiferer wrote: post #271

Earlier quoted context omitted.

"Europe"? I can assure you, the party cultures in Spain, Scandinavia, France and Greece are all pairwise so dramatically different that the U.S. are not the counterpole, but just another flavor in the sea of possibilities. The same applies to different cultures within these countries. Across areas, ages, socioeconomic backgrounds, political leanings, hobby groups. It's astonishing to me how many comments around here…

I’m always amused by this. The US has a hugely diverse set of attitudes to things and yet a surprising number of people there then look at a more populated combination of more than 25 countries with varied languages and histories who have fought many wars over history against each other have some singular approach to parties or cycling or anything else.

we have different culutures but Americans also have decades of media exposure to inform them on what an "American party" is. Especially if you grew up in the late 80's/90's where "party" was a literal genere of movie to subscribe to.

Now of course, media doesn't reflect reality. But it can certainly homogenize sentiment.

Re: Facts about throwing good parties

#334

Post by nxor »

johnnyanmac wrote: post #322
dlisboa wrote: post #14

I feel like this is really an American culture thing where parties or dinner parties are mostly the responsibility of the host. In movies or TV there’s even a common theme of guests judging the host’s hosting abilities. In Brazil you throw a party to people you like and they all have a hand in helping you, sharing the load. Everyone will be responsible for some part of it, all of it is organized informally, there are…

House parties are more common in America, so that may be a big reason. A party in that context isn't just about gathering people, it's bringing people into your own living space to be judged upon. And of course, many US gatherings are also means to move up the social ladder. Meeting new connections, finding mates, or getting intel on an area. Very capitalistic oriented.

So people under things other than capitalism don't behave that way. Right.

Re: Facts about throwing good parties

#335

Post by nxor »

bonoboTP wrote: post #296
watwut wrote: post #198

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Americans tend to think about themselves as informal/loose, but they evolved to be very formal and structural, in reality. Tend to like a lot of formal rules about everything. If you look at Latin American movies, they themselves are different then American movies and show different culture. They are not the exact copy of their cultures of original, but they certainly show quite different social behavior and values.

It's similar to how they schedule all the free time of their kids too. Or their own free time for that matter. Must spend every minute being productive, every minute counted towards some labeled activity. Everything that isn't classified as one of these things has to be cut out, minimized, made more efficient etc.

This is a great point. It's not as true outside cities but it's extremely true inside them.

Re: Facts about throwing good parties

#336

Post by johnnyanmac »

Animats wrote: post #78

(This is going to upset some people.) A successful escort who is into statistical data analysis and market research talks about the details of organizing an orgy.[1] Aella's thing is to ask questions that lead to "what do women really want", and go from there to design events. She has about 800,000 raw survey responses, so there's enough data to look for patterns. The answers will upset some people. The conventional…

>This post is for paid subscibers

Yeah I'm pretty upset. I just want to read the data but the "freemium" method is listening to a portion of a 20 minute talk? America in a nutshell.

Re: Facts about throwing good parties

#337

Post by nxor »

fragmede wrote: post #227
Aurornis wrote: post #60

Earlier quoted context omitted.

America is a huge place with a lot of different cultures. Even within a big city you’ll find social circles with different ideas of what partying is like. I have friend groups that have completely different ideas of what gatherings are and I adapt depending on the group. There is not a singular American party style. > In movies or TV there’s even a common theme of guests judging the host’s hosting abilities. That’s a…

Except for red Solo cups. That's absolutely a real American party thing. Source: Went to college in the US, also have been to stores in America where these cups are sold.

No one's saying nothing at all from the movies is real

Re: Facts about throwing good parties

#338

Post by accrual »

tgv wrote: post #305
sbuccini wrote: post #8

22) Turn the AC wayyyyyyy down when the party starts 23) Buy frozen finger food and put into oven in staggered batches. When a batch is ready, immediately transfer to serving tray and walk through party offering people food. Great task to delegate to that one attendee who doesn't know anyone! 24) Polaroids/Disposable cameras are cheap and seem to be universally adored. Get a few and scatter them throughout the party.…

Not being a USian: what does turning the AC down mean? Set the thermostat to a lower temperature or make it less active (i.e. set it to a higher temperature)?

Right, it means to turn down the Air Conditioning to reduce the temperature of the hosting space first. The reason being that as people arrive, temps will climb into something more comfortable.

Re: Facts about throwing good parties

#339

Post by johnnyanmac »

gpm wrote: post #81
z3ugma wrote: post #79

Earlier quoted context omitted.

“ This post is for paid subscribers “

I think the intent is you watch the 20 minute conference talk at the top, not read the paywalled post.

> The main part of the talk is available for anyone to watch, and the Q&A section is for paid supporter.

So I listen to part of a talk and don't get the actual feedback on the talk unless I pay them? It's like the opposite of the Socratic method.

Re: Facts about throwing good parties

#340

Post by johnnyanmac »

Animats wrote: post #87
gpm wrote: post #81

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I think the intent is you watch the 20 minute conference talk at the top, not read the paywalled post.

Right. You can watch the video, which is better than most YouTube videos, for free.

You need a better Youtube feed in that case.
Post reply on HN