331–340 of 686 posts
Married members of HN, what did you do if you think diamonds are utterly ridiclious however due to societal constraints some kind of ring is required for your SO?
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It also factors into how someone grew up. I'd rather toss 10k into a couple emergency fund then waste it on a ring. Most marriages collapse due to money. I recall in my younger days I was with a girl and she dragged me to Brooks Brothers. As a child of poverty and evictions I couldn't understand why anyone who need to spend this much money on a shirt. Even making well into the 6 figures I shop at Old Navy. Hell, my f…
>Most marriages collapse due to money. Some studies on factors leading to divorce do put 'money' (and particularly attitudes regarding money) as the biggest single factor, but I'm not familiar with any study (let alone a consensus) that it's a leading factor in 'most' divorces.
Children also includes weirdly a large subset on how to raise children (when marrying someone of a different faith)
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It also factors into how someone grew up. I'd rather toss 10k into a couple emergency fund then waste it on a ring. Most marriages collapse due to money. I recall in my younger days I was with a girl and she dragged me to Brooks Brothers. As a child of poverty and evictions I couldn't understand why anyone who need to spend this much money on a shirt. Even making well into the 6 figures I shop at Old Navy. Hell, my f…
People buy expensive clothes because it makes others think they have money. By wearing a brand she is mentally leaving the proviety behind. I don't think you have mentally left that state of mind. Thinking you need $10,000 in cash and telling everyone on the first date tells them this guy will never save more than 10,000 and he is cheap with his money. Might work for some but perhaps you are putting out a negative si…
All of those people in 2008 who lost their houses in my neighborhood had the left that state of mind.
A friend got proposed a couple of months ago and her ring is ~40k USD. In my opinion, that's crazy since they're spending ~30k CAD on their wedding.
My partner also mentioned that she'd like a wedding ring of the same calibre since according to her - diamond ring is how much love / value / worth I hold for her. Furthermore, a significant group of middle/upper-middle class want naturally occurring diamonds (because they're "real") over lab produced ones (not because of the quality, but because of the tag associated with and the societal group pressure). Furthermore, the same group also hate moissanite because it's not diamond.
It's irrational, marketing and conditioning all they way down.
Hopefully, stuff like this forces lab grown diamonds to the mainstream culture so that we can finally get rid of that mentality.
Married members of HN, what did you do if you think diamonds are utterly ridiclious however due to societal constraints some kind of ring is required for your SO?
That's when "Breach of Promise to Marry" laws gradually were abolished across the US. So now men could propose, enjoy premarital sex for a while, only to leave the woman no longer a virgin and possibly with STDs and/or pregnant.
The very expensive diamond you can keep even if he leaves became the "insurance policy" to replace the legal option.
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Diamond prices are fairly stable, the issue is jewelers mark prices way up and most people don't know what a good price is. If a diamond goes for $5k wholesale, chances are they're looking to sell it for $10-20k. Since most people only buy 1-2 engagement rings in their lifetime they don't know what is a reasonable price. They "shop around" at three stores that are all owned by the same company. So they end up paying…
This is all correct! I've worked in the diamond business for almost a decade now and see people complain on HN and Reddit constantly about diamonds all while barely understanding the industry at all. The common complaint of "you can't sell them for what you paid" is a dumb complaint because they don't understand the HUGE markup the stones receive at retail. Here's the profit margins that the stones receive along the…
You and the other person gives loads of reasons why people giving that complaint are entirely right. The marketing is (partly) that it is valuable. In practice you'll not be able to resell it for a similar value.
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It's not that simple. Almost everyone buys clothes, electronics made with child labor. I think you might have clothes made with child labor as well. Why do you draw the line at diamonds?
It is very difficult, and expensive, to completely avoid these products (clothes and a phone being necessities, more or less, in our society). Not saying it's justified, but it is understandable that even contentious people give up when it is nearly impossible to know for sure if something was made by slaves. Which is a terrible state of affairs... this information should be easy to find.
The author is outraged at the hypocrisy, without realising the value of diamonds is that they are scarce. If you can produce them artificially, they are no longer in the same league with the scarce ones.
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>(which I never even heard of outside of online discussions). Here's some ads from the 1980s advocating for two months salary - https://ichef.bbci.co.uk/news/976/media/images/74843000/jpg/... http://cdn.cavemancircus.com//wp-content/uploads/2020/08/dia... https://yourdiamondteacher.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/03/De...
I'm sure the jewelry businesses were peddling it, but I don't recall it ever being mentioned amongst people as if it were a cultural thing. Then again, maybe women talk about this kind of stuff, whereas men don't.
Most people I know don't really care at all (I'm 25 for reference), since they generally don't have the money to waste on such frivolous purchases.