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What If You Could Do It All Over?

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Re: What If You Could Do It All Over?

#321

Post by adrianN »

shortandsweet wrote: post #292
teekert wrote: post #284

Earlier quoted context omitted.

What I don't like about this quote is that it pretends you just have to choose between all these attractive and worthwhile goals and that the choosing is the difficult part. In reality though you may opt for a career, leave the family but fail. Or you may put your career on a lower pitch only to have your wife and you decide it won't really work out. In reality, it's more like you start to climb for a fat purple fig…

Why do you assume it's not your fault?

A large part of life is just luck. Think of all the chance events that had a big impact on your life. For me for example, almost all my success hinges on me randomly seeing a certain poster in a hallway in 2008.

Re: What If You Could Do It All Over?

#322

Post by tailspin2019 »

rklaehn wrote: post #276

I wasted a lot of time in my life. I was into C++ programming many years before the first dotcom boom. But I did not really profit from it. Instead I studied for many years, then slacked off for a few years, and only started working full time as a software engineer at the age of 30, working on satellite operations and the ground system of the international space station. I could have been a millionaire many times ove…

> On the other hand, only due to my weird, suboptimal path through life did I meet my wife, which is for me a global optimum. I literally can not think of anybody I would rather spend the rest of my life with.

This is inspiring. Thanks for sharing!

Re: What If You Could Do It All Over?

#323

Post by tailspin2019 »

darren_ wrote: post #241

“Did you ever wonder what life would have been like if you’d said yes?” said Ridcully. “No.” “I suppose we’d have settled down, had children, grandchildren, that sort of thing…” “What about the fire?” she said. “What fire?” “Swept through our house just after we were married. Killed us both.” “What fire? I don’t know anything about any fire!” Granny turned around. “Of course not! It didn’t happen. But the point is, i…

Had to look this up. Looks like it's from Terry Pratchett's "Lords and Ladies"?

Re: What If You Could Do It All Over?

#324

Post by learnstats2 »

JustARandomGuy wrote: post #73

I used to think like this, but then I saw the Star Trek TNG episode Tapestry [1] where the premise is much like this question. Picard accepts Q's offer to relive his life, and it turns out that even the negative things in Picard's life help to shape the good qualities he has. I consider my life to be much the similar: even the negative things or the things I wish would change have helped shape qualities that I would…

Whilst I enjoyed that episode, it was fictional. Did Picard really need to be stabbed in the heart, just to learn his lesson? (And, his 'unremarkable career' seemed to be a bigger criticism of Starfleet/the Federation than we normally see - what's wrong with an ordinary life?)

I would be happy to remove the trauma that I experienced in my past. I'd take the risk of being a different person - with different good qualities.

Re: What If You Could Do It All Over?

#325

Post by richajak »

JustARandomGuy wrote: post #73

I used to think like this, but then I saw the Star Trek TNG episode Tapestry [1] where the premise is much like this question. Picard accepts Q's offer to relive his life, and it turns out that even the negative things in Picard's life help to shape the good qualities he has. I consider my life to be much the similar: even the negative things or the things I wish would change have helped shape qualities that I would…

I always like to do new and different things. It is the main reason I migrated several times and changed job many times. Currently I am doing my own startup. Sometimes I wonder what life would be if I live a simple boring life? Will I be more successful? or end up like Captain Picard in his alternate universe?

Re: What If You Could Do It All Over?

#326

Post by tailspin2019 »

sircastor wrote: post #213

I think if I could “do it all over” it wouldn’t be any particular life choices I’d make differently, but to seek mental health treatment earlier on. I learned only recently that I suffer from depression, and I feel if I would have learned that earlier, I could have/would have understood myself a lot better. I don’t know if that would have changed my decisions, but I can tell you just knowing that information has chan…

Good luck with your treatment. Mindfulness, a bunch of good books, and later some drugs all helped me in different but significant ways!

Re: What If You Could Do It All Over?

#327

Post by imtringued »

adrianN wrote: post #321
shortandsweet wrote: post #292

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Why do you assume it's not your fault?

A large part of life is just luck. Think of all the chance events that had a big impact on your life. For me for example, almost all my success hinges on me randomly seeing a certain poster in a hallway in 2008.

Extreme example: You are the ultimate decision making machine that never makes any mistakes. Did you choose to be that machine?

Re: What If You Could Do It All Over?

#329

Post by mellosouls »

acwan93 wrote: post #8

This reminds me of “The Bell Jar” by Sylvia Plath, which has a quote Aziz Ansari used in his series “Master of None”: > "I saw my life branching out before me like the green fig tree in the story. From the tip of every branch, like a fat purple fig, a wonderful future beckoned and winked. One fig was a husband and a happy home and children, and another fig was a famous poet and another fig was a brilliant professor,…

That's a beautiful rendering of the anxiety of choice and FOMO.

Re: What If You Could Do It All Over?

#330

Post by bartwe »

superkuh wrote: post #119
acwan93 wrote: post #8

This reminds me of “The Bell Jar” by Sylvia Plath, which has a quote Aziz Ansari used in his series “Master of None”: > "I saw my life branching out before me like the green fig tree in the story. From the tip of every branch, like a fat purple fig, a wonderful future beckoned and winked. One fig was a husband and a happy home and children, and another fig was a famous poet and another fig was a brilliant professor,…

It reminds me a lot of "The Guy I Almost Was" (Patrick Sean Farley) http://www.electricsheepcomix.com/almostguy/ . It's an old (from the early 2000s) comic about trying to get into the tech scene in the 90s. Alternate life paths are explicitly explored.

Thanks, that was an enjoyable read
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