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People Who Are Obsessed with Success and Prestige

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Re: People Who Are Obsessed with Success and Prestige

#321

Post by dcole2929 »

snegu wrote: post #285
asdfman123 wrote: post #262

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Nah, I didn't even need scholarships. The financial aid was really good for Stanford undergrad. My brother went to a state school undergrad, then got grad degrees from Harvard and Georgetown. He's almost done paying off an assload of debt, but it's meant he's had to work as a consultant these last ten years.

I think everybody thought you were talking about "fancy private" elementary/high schools, which is definitely not a middle class thing. Private college/university is a totally different matter.

They have scholarships for private k-12 too. I went to one 6-12 and my family was at no point ever more than lower-middle class. I got what amounted to a full ride almost my entire time there. And even as the family made more still didn't pay much.

Re: People Who Are Obsessed with Success and Prestige

#322

Post by mntmoss »

ImaCake wrote: post #287
asdfman123 wrote: post #94

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I've noticed something about subreddits that focus on lifestyle design and center around advice: they all start to converge on fairly narrow groupthink. /r/personalfinance is all about super frugal living and passive investing. In /r/backpacking, the general advice is to go as light as possible and spend money reducing weight. /r/cscareerquestions is about the leetcode grind and getting into FAANG. /r/malefashionadvi…

>I've noticed something about subreddits that focus on lifestyle design and center around advice: they all start to converge on fairly narrow groupthink. To me, this is a novel insight, thanks :) I have been wondering what has been causing my frustration towards these kind of subreddits. But this makes it clear that the problem is a lack of actual discussion and no challenges made against the assumptions of the in-gr…

The most important thing I've done for myself recently is to start breaking away from the social streams by doing my own aggregation with Fraidycat. Besides letting me assemble a lot of sources, it dampens the noise because it doesn't let a single feed drown out the rest: that Twitter account that can't stop shitposting every two seconds in between the real insights is thus tamed.

And so there's a distinct "lack of addictive qualities" when I open it, followed by some very rewarding content. It does take a little time to put together but it helps that we have social streams now to sample from, since so many of them ultimately link to a slower-moving source of real content like a personal blog.

Re: People Who Are Obsessed with Success and Prestige

#323

Post by tines »

pazimzadeh wrote: post #270
hedgedoops2 wrote: post #179

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Cusins. By the way, have you any religion? Undershaft. Yes. Cusins. Anything out of the common? Undershaft. Only that there are two things necessary to Salvation. Cusins [disappointed, but polite] Ah, the Church Catechism. Baptism and — Undershaft. No. Money and gunpowder. Cusins [surprised, but interested] That is the general opinion of our governing classes. The novelty is in hearing any man confess it. Undershaft.…

Interesting play! Cusins [in a white fury] Do I understand you to imply that you can buy Barbara? Undershaft. No; but I can buy the Salvation Army. Cusins. Quite impossible. Undershaft. You shall see. All religious organizations exist by selling themselves to the rich. Cusins. Not the Army. That is the Church of the poor. Undershaft. All the more reason for buying it. Cusins. I don’t think you quite know what the Arm…

"We are counted as sleep for the slaughter; for thy sake we are killed all the day long."

Re: People Who Are Obsessed with Success and Prestige

#324

Post by adamsea »

toomuchtodo wrote: post #284
esjeon wrote: post #282

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The eulogy virtue is what we need to make the society a better place. A resume virtue is what we need to sustain ourselves. One is closer to ideal, one is closer to reality. Balance is the only thing we need for a healthy and happy life.

Mr Money Mustache said in his YC interview, “don’t start a blog, start a cult.” This sounds like the sort of (positive) cult to found. Using peer support and reinforcement to better enable success in living a virtuous life.

A positive cult is either a contradiction in terms, or a religion, depending on your perspective.

But I get what the quote is saying - to aim to inspire passion in others.

Re: People Who Are Obsessed with Success and Prestige

#325

Post by jophde »

mcguire wrote: post #305
fourmyle wrote: post #218

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Going through the realization right now that I need to go “FANG” or get out of the Bay Area right now. Just got engaged and I have been looking at costs. I thought I could make a small family work here on $170k. That’s dead wrong. I would need at least $300k to make a family of 4 comfortable here. My wife and I both want her to stay at home and focus on the kids and she makes non tech money anyway. Even at this amoun…

San Francisco-Oakland-Hayward, CA Metro Area: https://censusreporter.org/profiles/31000US41860-san-francis... Median household income: $108k Owner-occupied dwellings: 55%

Now do people 25-35 that are buying in todays market. That might take you longer than 30 seconds though.

Re: People Who Are Obsessed with Success and Prestige

#326

Post by anthonypasq »

pkhamre wrote: post #60

> Should I learn to make pasta from scratch? No, that’s crazy. Nobody cares if you can make pasta from scratch and it’s not going to make any money. I think the author got it wrong here. He mixes the words "successful" with "fame". By learning a skill like making pasta from scratch, you can make yourself and other people happy. And if you go deep into the field, you can even make money on it, if that's important to y…

People like Bill Gates are just lucky they were born liking programming and accruing power as much as some other people are born liking video games.

Re: People Who Are Obsessed with Success and Prestige

#327

Post by caconym_ »

michalf6 wrote: post #199
bumby wrote: post #168

From David Brooks: "I’ve been thinking about the difference between the résumé virtues and the eulogy virtues. The résumé virtues are the ones you list on your résumé, the skills that you bring to the job market and that contribute to external success. The eulogy virtues are deeper. They’re the virtues that get talked about at your funeral, the ones that exist at the core of your being — whether you are kind, brave,…

Thing is, by the time your eulogy is written, you're already dead. I prefer to leave my kids with a tangible legacy than a beautiful story of a guy who was too kind to be a dick when he needed to. Besides, words chosen for your eulogy depend on the influence you managed to build while still living.

> a beautiful story of a guy who was too kind to be a dick when he needed to.

This is a narrow and incomplete view of what's being talked about.

> words chosen for your eulogy depend on the influence you managed to build while still living.

Assuming there's anybody at all around to choose them, and assuming that they are honest, I'd say they depend much more on what sort of person you were.

Maybe the influence you built will have a large effect on who hears them, but if you weren't "obsessed with success and prestige" in life then you would probably have been fine with a smaller crowd at your funeral anyway.

Re: People Who Are Obsessed with Success and Prestige

#328

Post by bambax »

philwelch wrote: post #320
bambax wrote: post #307

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I do have kids. Did they teach me something about human nature? Not that I noticed. I still go to the bar often. Do I learn anything about human nature there? A little, yes, but not much (in essence, that people act stupid when drunk. They can be very funny though). Do I travel? Yes. What does that teach me? Mostly, that there's no place like home. I maintain you will learn a lot more, and a lot faster, by reading Sh…

Novels are literally made-up stories. If they actually happened, they wouldn't be novels, they would be memoirs or history or something. We do disagree on whether the purpose of novels is to entertain or to deliver what you call TRUTH. Now, to be as generous as possible to your point, some writers can distill a lifetime of wisdom and experience into a work of literature in a way that expresses some meaningful sense o…

Capitalization really seems to have upset you! It was more shouting than praying, though. I meant to say NO! to the statement that novels are "lies". They are the opposite of that. Lies are meant to deceive and exploit. Novels want to help you find the truth, any which way you want to type it.

And to respond to your 2nd paragraph, I'm not saying that (good) novels contain wisdom plainly stated as clever observations every few sentences. That would be a kind of diluted essay and would be of very little value.

That's not the point at all. Novels are machines. They work or they don't. You don't need to have extensive wisdom to decide if they do, just like you don't need to be a mechanic to know if your car won't start.

When they work, they show you a true situation. They don't "deliver" anything. They show. They make plain. They are not a list of interesting tidbits ("10 hidden truths about yourself!!"); they are an experience.

Re: People Who Are Obsessed with Success and Prestige

#329

Post by undefined_user6 »

bumby wrote: post #168

From David Brooks: "I’ve been thinking about the difference between the résumé virtues and the eulogy virtues. The résumé virtues are the ones you list on your résumé, the skills that you bring to the job market and that contribute to external success. The eulogy virtues are deeper. They’re the virtues that get talked about at your funeral, the ones that exist at the core of your being — whether you are kind, brave,…

Article for those interested: https://www.nytimes.com/2015/04/12/opinion/sunday/david-broo...

Re: People Who Are Obsessed with Success and Prestige

#330

Post by state_less »

christiansakai wrote: post #186
hedgedoops2 wrote: post #179

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Cusins. By the way, have you any religion? Undershaft. Yes. Cusins. Anything out of the common? Undershaft. Only that there are two things necessary to Salvation. Cusins [disappointed, but polite] Ah, the Church Catechism. Baptism and — Undershaft. No. Money and gunpowder. Cusins [surprised, but interested] That is the general opinion of our governing classes. The novelty is in hearing any man confess it. Undershaft.…

As someone with a seminary background, this hits too close to home "Cusins. Excuse me: is there any place in your religion for honor, justice, truth, love, mercy and so forth? Undershaft. Yes: they are the graces and luxuries of a rich, strong, and safe life."

I hold the old view that justice is a source of strength rather than something bought independent of it.

There is honor even among thieves. For example, a just group of thieves splits the bounty and return to steal together again as a team with improved skill, trust and cohesion. Sure they are scoundrels to their community, but they are just with each other. If they weren't, they'd in-fight and become weaker. This is true of militias and painfully obvious when two groups of forces lose faith, trust and a sense of justice with each other.

So I think justice is a virtue, and I think it's safe to say virtue is a source of strength.

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