That’s very sweet, thanks! I’m dealing with the loss of my father and the holiday season just feels a lot more...poignant? sobering? I wish the timeline for grief weren’t as protracted as it seems to be
Tell HN: You are not alone this Christmas
311–320 of 326 posts
Re: Tell HN: You are not alone this Christmas
#312I'm visiting my parents in a few hours and it's probably going to suck. We've really been drifting apart since they found out I was vaccinated and actually taking Covid seriously. Ugly things were said about me being a dumb sheep brainwashed by uni education etc. Anyway, I'm joining the virtual all-HN hug. Some people have it worse, and if you (the person reading this) are one of those people, I want you to know that…
If your views on Covid overrule your parents love for you then there wasn’t much love in the first place.
Re: Tell HN: You are not alone this Christmas
#313Earlier quoted context omitted.
I went from a completely sedentary desk life to running a half-marathon in 7 months (includes a 1 month groin injury). On a treadmill, training myself. You can do it, too, and the effect on mood is spectacular. In fact the effect on mood comes way before a half-marathon. So don’t get overwhelmed and think you have to do that much.
I'll add that virtually all running groups you find on Facebook or Meetup are very welcoming of new runners of all experience and ability levels. Having the regular schedule of a running group helps a lot with keeping up the regular exercise, especially when the weather gets questionable. Running groups seem intimidating to everyone - even reasonably fast amateur runners. Once you go however you will find you will me…
They were intimidating to me so I never went. Add the weather variability, and knee wear when running on pavement, and I just stuck to the treadmill the whole time. Even for the half-marathons. I realize I missed out on the social aspect, but if you are running with headphones and huffing and puffing, how much socializing is there? I guess the socializing must happen before and after.
Even still, maybe I’ll give it a try. Thanks for the tip.
Re: Tell HN: You are not alone this Christmas
#314Earlier quoted context omitted.
I'll add that virtually all running groups you find on Facebook or Meetup are very welcoming of new runners of all experience and ability levels. Having the regular schedule of a running group helps a lot with keeping up the regular exercise, especially when the weather gets questionable. Running groups seem intimidating to everyone - even reasonably fast amateur runners. Once you go however you will find you will me…
They were intimidating to me so I never went. Add the weather variability, and knee wear when running on pavement, and I just stuck to the treadmill the whole time. Even for the half-marathons. I realize I missed out on the social aspect, but if you are running with headphones and huffing and puffing, how much socializing is there? I guess the socializing must happen before and after. Even still, maybe I’ll give it a…
One of my weekly group runs is 4 miles followed by beers with the runners on an early week day evening. Monday nights another group offers options of 3 and 5 miles and we always wait for everyone at the half way point and finish point. Another one is Friday mornings at 6 am a 6 mile loop around the lake followed by coffee. Saturday mornings at 7 am one of my groups does long runs - those are especially cool because they provide many distance options (I usually go 13-18 miles) and people then group up based on pace. For the long runs I always run much slower than I would do otherwise - this is where it is really nice to have people to chat with.
I would never get up so early if it weren't for these groups.
Other than these running groups I actually don't have a friend group where I live. It's nice to consistently see a mix of regular and new people and do something healthy (except for your knees perhaps) together.
By the way I really like wearing Hoka One One shoes for their extra cushioning. Definitely helps with pavement.
If you are bored of pavement, at least where I live there are many trail running groups too. I just don't like having to drive far to start running.
Re: Tell HN: You are not alone this Christmas
#315Thank you for this gesture. I lost almost everything. Job, 7-year relationship, my mental health. Feeling that I'm not only alone but inadequate to have a life like anybody else. I'm still alive, so there's that.
I'm sorry you're going through this. I went through a dark night of the soul a few years ago amidst some professional setbacks. More recently, I've been on the edge of losing my 17-year marriage; we are still exploring whether reconciliation is possible. The vulnerability, honesty, and goodwill in threads like this always warms my heart and bolsters my faith in humanity. I'll offer my own contribution. I wrote a deep…
Thank you so much for sharing your book! That’s very generous of you. I hope you’re able to get through your current challenges too.
Re: Tell HN: You are not alone this Christmas
#316I am terrified of being alone. Thankfully I have a bunch of good friends but it's been hard to meet them due to covid.
Is it better to be alone or be in a relationship that you are sort of okay with and not completely happy with it?
Re: Tell HN: You are not alone this Christmas
#317There was a Category 5 Typhoon in in the Philippines where I am last week. The power was out and there was no electricity, refrigeration, or internet for a week. One of the transformers in my neibourhood blew out and got destroyed, and at 6pm on Christmas Eve they replaced it and we finally had power! I'm a software developer with a wife and two kids and we have a lot to be thankful for. We survided COVID-19 and a Ca…
Totally OT, but what is it like to be inside a Category 5 hurricane ?
Not OP, but:
Ancient oak trees, with canopies the size of houses, gingerly cartwheeling down the street, until a wind shift sends it rolling through the neighbors(empty) house. Watching their entire lives evaporate into projectiles that peppered everything downwind.
Modern garage door being sucked out, thrown over the house, to impale itself into the house behind it, evaporating it a few seconds later.
Large trucks, turning side-over-side, like logs rolling down a hill.
A cast iron bench being launched like a rocket into a neighbors window, turning the contents of that room, window, frame, and window air conditioner into a debris field; something from with-which punched a hole through a stop sign.
The roof of my house being lifted 6-10 inches directly upward, rotated about 30 degrees, and slammed back down. Like a sonic boom went off 10ft over-head.
Front support column being blown through my living room window, glass embedding itself into the walls opposite.
The physics of your everyday environment radically and violently change, you see things that you can't see anywhere else. I was on a few drugs while everything was going on, and there's so much more, but none of that was what really messed me up.
I don't know if other people have ever seen something that their brain couldn't understand at all. Like all context does not exist, this is entirely new to human experience kinda thing:
My house had a big ditch behind it, then a set of train tracks that were about a foot lower than my land grade, then another big ditch, then a state park. A very large state park that was miles and miles of ancient oaks, swamps, etc.
I walked out behind my house when the storm cleared, and I froze because I couldn't understand what I was seeing: Imagine an eldritch-old forest, you see it everyday, and now where an impenetrable wall of wood was, is now white horizon. It had been flattened, or erased. My eyes were seeing the white horizon while my brain was struggling with my memory and anticipation. It's the most disassociated I've ever felt without advanced chemistry.
Re: Tell HN: You are not alone this Christmas
#318I'm visiting my parents in a few hours and it's probably going to suck. We've really been drifting apart since they found out I was vaccinated and actually taking Covid seriously. Ugly things were said about me being a dumb sheep brainwashed by uni education etc. Anyway, I'm joining the virtual all-HN hug. Some people have it worse, and if you (the person reading this) are one of those people, I want you to know that…
If your views on Covid overrule your parents love for you then there wasn’t much love in the first place.
I know what you mean, but this is actually not the case. I had a wonderful childhood and my parents are caring, loving people who supported me throughout uni and have always been, I believe, quite proud of me. Somewhere around 2019-2020 they both got hit by this huge wall of Qanon, pro-Russia and later anti-vax propaganda all mixed together into one clusterfuck conspiracy theory and they've been riding that wave since. That's the most terrifying thing about all this, they're both very normal and above-average intelligent people, my mum even has a master's degree.
Re: Tell HN: You are not alone this Christmas
#319You're never alone with the best Christmas movie ever made, Die Hard.
Re: Tell HN: You are not alone this Christmas
#320Earlier quoted context omitted.
I was exactly in your situation 2 years ago (at the start of COVID) and I know what you're going through. I'm not going to tell you to "stay strong" , emotions are a natural thing and should not be suppressed and it's ok to be vulnerable. However, there are a few things that helped me get through the dark times, I am writing them below in the hopes that you may find them useful: 1. Exercise, this is absolutely critic…
Thank you so much for this. I'm already doing some (2, 4, 5) others are planned for 2022 (1, 3, 6). But 7 is brutal. I was going to propose but things changed. Anyway, again: thank you very much. This is very appreciated. Very kind of you.
The best way to get over somebody is to get under somebody else. Or over them. Or behind, or in front, or over cam, or whatever position and/or food/substance does it for you.