Student beauty and grades under in-person and remote teaching • Hacker News Board

Re: Student beauty and grades under in-person and remote teaching

#301

Post by hristov » Mon, Mar 23, 2026, 3:57 PM UTC

TrackerFF wrote: post #68

People that have used to be fat, and then lost a lot of weight, will know how brutally different people will treat you. Whereas you'd practically be a ghost before weight loss, random people will suddenly look you in your eyes, smile, even start conversations with you. Some will of course argue that you losing weight will also make you more confident, and thus you become more approachable. I think there's a lot of bi…

That is probably true. I remember I felt really bad when my high school teachers were openly flirting with students during class.

But there is another side to the coin. If you are attractive, a lot of the nastier people out there will try to manipulate you and gaslight you just to be closer to you all the time. Some people will be cruel and nasty to you just because they know you will sexually reject them. Some teachers will be mean or passive aggressive towards you because they are attracted to you and they know they can never be with you.

It is actually very dangerous to be attractive but not to have the social skills to handle the way people react to it. Many attractive people grow up with these social skills because they grown up as attractive children and they get used to it, but for some people that suddenly become attractive because they lose weight or another reason it can be very challenging. Similarly for people that are just born introverts and don't have the social skills.

Re: Student beauty and grades under in-person and remote teaching

#302

Post by Aurornis » Mon, Mar 23, 2026, 3:57 PM UTC

kapep wrote: post #215

Aurornis wrote: post #108

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Whereas you'd practically be a ghost before weight loss, random people will suddenly look you in your eyes, smile, even start conversations with you. I watched something like this happen in a friend, but as an outside observer I saw a different explanation: The period when he got into shape involved a lot of changes for the better in his life, including becoming more outgoing, motivated, and disciplined (necessary…

A data point, though my situation is not even about weight: I used to be skinny fat in my mid-twenties until mid-thirties - so basically still kind of slim but some belly fat and not much muscles. Kind of average, unremarkable. After a breakup I started being more active again, I went bouldering once a week and gradually got into shape and then really athletic after about 2 years when I started going twice a week. My…

> Before I felt mostly invisible but since then got approached in bars all the time, which rarely happened before.

Physical attractiveness is extremely relevant in the context of cold approaches in a dating environment. I won’t disagree with you there.

However getting approached at bars is very different than working with someone in an office setting or having your papers graded in a university setting.

Re: Student beauty and grades under in-person and remote teaching

#303

Post by snarf21 » Mon, Mar 23, 2026, 3:59 PM UTC

kxrm wrote: post #61

My first job during and out of college back in 2003, we were entirely remote. We hired exclusively over the phone which resulted in a mix of people that were completely diverse in their backgrounds and at the same time truly qualified to do the work. The company went on to grow quite successfully until it was acquired 6 years later. I feel that zoom and video conferencing allows some of that "appearance" factor back…

The best hiring advice is this: Take half of the resumes you receive and just throw them in the trash. You don't want to hire unlucky people!

Re: Student beauty and grades under in-person and remote teaching

#304

Post by kjkjadksj » Mon, Mar 23, 2026, 3:59 PM UTC

Revanche1367 wrote: post #87

TrackerFF wrote: post #68

People that have used to be fat, and then lost a lot of weight, will know how brutally different people will treat you. Whereas you'd practically be a ghost before weight loss, random people will suddenly look you in your eyes, smile, even start conversations with you. Some will of course argue that you losing weight will also make you more confident, and thus you become more approachable. I think there's a lot of bi…

I feel this as a guy trying to lose weight very seriously this year. On one hand, I can lose weight but I will forever be short unless a miracle occurs lol. I’ve made my peace with being unattractive for the most part, the attempt to lose weight is primarily for health reasons.

Short guys have a vastly easier time getting jacked at least.

Re: Student beauty and grades under in-person and remote teaching

#305

Post by bombcar » Mon, Mar 23, 2026, 4:00 PM UTC

Aurornis wrote: post #281

jeremie_strand wrote: post #116

[flagged]

I don’t think it’s that simple. My assistant professor friends build relationships with students and help them work on topics and weaknesses. They get to know students and how to help them on problem areas. For deeper courses they may help them pick topics to write about and sources to read. Having that context for the ongoing feedback from grading and mentoring is valuable. Depending on the work it simply might not…

Yes, unless you have the grading done by someone else in some sort of double-blind setup, or replace everything with computer-graded multiple-choice questions, you're still going to be pretty identifiable.

Re: Student beauty and grades under in-person and remote teaching

#306

Post by windward » Mon, Mar 23, 2026, 4:01 PM UTC

amelius wrote: post #163

Aurornis wrote: post #108

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Whereas you'd practically be a ghost before weight loss, random people will suddenly look you in your eyes, smile, even start conversations with you. I watched something like this happen in a friend, but as an outside observer I saw a different explanation: The period when he got into shape involved a lot of changes for the better in his life, including becoming more outgoing, motivated, and disciplined (necessary…

> He also bought a new wardrobe and replaced his old worn out logo T-shirts and cargo shorts with clothes more appropriate for an adult. I think the problem many __men__ have with that is that an "appropriate" wardrobe looks more uniform and less individualized, basically boring.

PC said logo T-shirt and cargo shorts because they are so un-individual that they have become cliche.

Re: Student beauty and grades under in-person and remote teaching

#307

Post by lynx97 » Mon, Mar 23, 2026, 4:01 PM UTC

TrackerFF wrote: post #68

People that have used to be fat, and then lost a lot of weight, will know how brutally different people will treat you. Whereas you'd practically be a ghost before weight loss, random people will suddenly look you in your eyes, smile, even start conversations with you. Some will of course argue that you losing weight will also make you more confident, and thus you become more approachable. I think there's a lot of bi…

You obviously have never had to deal with a disability. I would swap with a fat person every day. Reading your "complaint" makes me seriously sad, because what you perceive as a problem is just the tip of the iceberg. Its like someone complaining about the lack of icecream while others are being beaten up in brought daylight.

Re: Student beauty and grades under in-person and remote teaching

#308

Post by bluGill » Mon, Mar 23, 2026, 4:01 PM UTC

amelius wrote: post #246

ghaff wrote: post #196

Earlier quoted context omitted.

And you can usually tell the difference between a tailored suit and something ill-fitting.

I find that buttoned shirts only work if your belly is flat, so you can wear it in your pants. With even a tiny bit of belly fat, ime it is better to just wear a t-shirt and not wear it in your pants.

Tailors can make a button down shirt that will fit your body. You will look fat, but you can look much nicer. It will cost you though.

Re: Student beauty and grades under in-person and remote teaching

#309

Post by bombcar » Mon, Mar 23, 2026, 4:03 PM UTC

master-lincoln wrote: post #93

Foobar8568 wrote: post #38

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Who is your parents play a larger role than attractiveness.

A larger role for grading University students? Certainly not where I studied in central Europe. In which country do university tutors know the parents of their students?

They're trying to say that if you're born to (successful/married/privileged/whatever you want) parents, that will have more of an effect on your outcomes than your attractiveness.

But that's orthogonal to the question. It's probably true that Zuck's kids will do better than mine (though that also depends on how you measure things) but that doesn't change whether they'd do better if they looked better.

Re: Student beauty and grades under in-person and remote teaching

#310

Post by kjkjadksj » Mon, Mar 23, 2026, 4:04 PM UTC

TrackerFF wrote: post #68

People that have used to be fat, and then lost a lot of weight, will know how brutally different people will treat you. Whereas you'd practically be a ghost before weight loss, random people will suddenly look you in your eyes, smile, even start conversations with you. Some will of course argue that you losing weight will also make you more confident, and thus you become more approachable. I think there's a lot of bi…

I wonder how often it is unintentional or somewhat polite. As a kid I got into this habit of not really looking at obese or disabled people because I didn’t want to seem like I was staring at them like some of my slackjawed peers might. I think to an extent this bleeds over into adult life. Obese or disabled people might think it is malicious but the behavior might really come from good intentions at least to some degree. A boring dystopia sort of situation IMO.