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My Girlfriend Dissociated and Forgot Who I Was

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Re: My Girlfriend Dissociated and Forgot Who I Was

#31

Post by delinka »

theVirginian wrote: post #16

This is an interesting story and if I were a psychiatrist I would be fascinated to study how consciousness can be separated from the ego. In addition, props to the writer; call me selfish all you want but I could absolutely never love someone in a romantic way who had this kind of issue.

They say that you can't choose who you love. I'd suggest that whether to love them wouldn't be an option. You might fall in love, later learn about your SO's diagnosis, and decide you wanted to change yourself to continue to be with them.

However, knowing that you're not personally equipped to deal with these things and that the "object of your affection" might be better off without you is a certain kind of wisdom.

Re: My Girlfriend Dissociated and Forgot Who I Was

#32

Post by hga »

MrJagil wrote: post #14

I was curious with the difference between schizophrenia and DID, since most mental illnesses overlap tremendously. If anyone has a better source, you're welcome to elaborate: "Schizophrenia and dissociative identity disorder are often confused, but they are very different. Schizophrenia is a severe mental illness involving chronic (or recurrent) psychosis, characterized mainly by hearing or seeing things that aren't…

In my very limited contact with people who were suffering from schizophrenia, it's clear their minds, their ability to think, is broken in some fundamental way. This is indeed completely different, the person can think properly, it's just that some things are gone. If it's like my girlfriend who had it when with me, this woman regressed in time a bit, not so far she forgot that previous boyfriend, but enough to forget the current one. But I wouldn't be surprised if DID can be more nuanced.

Re: My Girlfriend Dissociated and Forgot Who I Was

#33

Post by WalterSear »

rmxt wrote: post #25
pastas wrote: post #15

It was a voluntary response. This is moronic. Its unbelievable that so many well paid, "highly educated" professionals give this kind of nonsense credence. The girl elected to have a little flip out episode after she told her boyfriend "I'm about to dissociate". She obviously had no conscious part in her decision, right? Nothing is mentioned about her being under the influence of psychoactive substances - so discussi…

Thanks for the mansplanation -- glad that you can tell us all about how voluntary it was from up on your high horse of rationality and the saddle of free will. Now, whole bodies of academic work, and whole fields of science, would suggest that "little flip out episodes" that can be classified according to well developed criteria are significant enough to be named and described. Naming, description and classification…

>Thanks for the mansplanation

Thanks for reminding me that some people will always hold my gender against me.

Re: My Girlfriend Dissociated and Forgot Who I Was

#34

Post by hga »

saulrh wrote: post #10
jjtheblunt wrote: post #5

what does this have to do with programming? Edit: responses to the question make sense.

For whatever reason, most of the programmers I know are intrigued in some way by brains; maybe it's something to do with being able to handle abstraction, or seeing consciousness as just another process or program, or something like that. Throw in how we're all used to debugging systems by observing the way break down produce emergent behavior, and something like this story becomes a fascinating tidbit about and pote…

Indeed. To the extent you can separate your viewpoint from the horror of it, it is truly fascinating.

Re: My Girlfriend Dissociated and Forgot Who I Was

#35

Post by theVirginian »

delinka wrote: post #31
theVirginian wrote: post #16

This is an interesting story and if I were a psychiatrist I would be fascinated to study how consciousness can be separated from the ego. In addition, props to the writer; call me selfish all you want but I could absolutely never love someone in a romantic way who had this kind of issue.

They say that you can't choose who you love. I'd suggest that whether to love them wouldn't be an option. You might fall in love, later learn about your SO's diagnosis, and decide you wanted to change yourself to continue to be with them. However, knowing that you're not personally equipped to deal with these things and that the "object of your affection" might be better off without you is a certain kind of wisdom.

Exactly, I think I might continue to love that person but I don't think I would be equipped to deal with an event such as the author described and then continue to be "sexually" attracted to them. (not sure that term quite captures it but you get the point)

Re: My Girlfriend Dissociated and Forgot Who I Was

#38

Post by vinbreau »

hga wrote: post #32
MrJagil wrote: post #14

I was curious with the difference between schizophrenia and DID, since most mental illnesses overlap tremendously. If anyone has a better source, you're welcome to elaborate: "Schizophrenia and dissociative identity disorder are often confused, but they are very different. Schizophrenia is a severe mental illness involving chronic (or recurrent) psychosis, characterized mainly by hearing or seeing things that aren't…

In my very limited contact with people who were suffering from schizophrenia, it's clear their minds, their ability to think, is broken in some fundamental way. This is indeed completely different, the person can think properly, it's just that some things are gone. If it's like my girlfriend who had it when with me, this woman regressed in time a bit, not so far she forgot that previous boyfriend, but enough to forge…

Agreed. I've lost three friends over the years to schizophrenia. I knew them all well before, during and after. Their minds are simply broken, their reality is not the same as ours. One believed he was a ninja protecting the world, another saw himself as the hero of a WWIII future, the third wanted to bind his spirit with alligators to grow his spiritual totem. DID sounds very, very different.

Re: My Girlfriend Dissociated and Forgot Who I Was

#39

Post by outworlder »

kazinator wrote: post #36

I would just move on. A flaky person like this is poor relationship material, especially if you see children in your future. "Where am I? What are these kids doing here and why are they calling me Mom?" Like, no thanks!

That is an horrible thing to say.

She is not 'flaky' as a spoiled socialite would be, she has a mental disease. One that only seems to crop up from time to time.

'Poor relationship material'? She is still a human being in need of support. I'd say you're poor relationship material.

Re: My Girlfriend Dissociated and Forgot Who I Was

#40

Post by mod »

theVirginian wrote: post #35
delinka wrote: post #31

Earlier quoted context omitted.

They say that you can't choose who you love. I'd suggest that whether to love them wouldn't be an option. You might fall in love, later learn about your SO's diagnosis, and decide you wanted to change yourself to continue to be with them. However, knowing that you're not personally equipped to deal with these things and that the "object of your affection" might be better off without you is a certain kind of wisdom.

Exactly, I think I might continue to love that person but I don't think I would be equipped to deal with an event such as the author described and then continue to be "sexually" attracted to them. (not sure that term quite captures it but you get the point)

I like imperfect stuff. It has more character.

I can't really see how finding a flaw in a person could change my attraction to them (particularly sexually, though I know you said that wasn't exactly what you meant). Especially this flaw--it's not a moral failing. Moral failings are, indeed, distasteful.

If it's 3 hours per year, I can certainly handle that to be in love.

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