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The Eligible Bachelor Paradox

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Re: The Eligible Bachelor Paradox

#31

Post by whacked_new »

vaksel wrote: post #24

I think additional part of the problem is that men are starting to realize that they really don't have anything to gain by being married. And they are so afraid of having to go through a divorce that can wipe them out, that they don't feel like trying. I mean a 50% divorce rate in this country, is pretty much a coin toss on whether or not you lose everything. Seriously the only thing to gain by being married is savin…

> Marrying an American woman is pretty much the worst decision you can make. If you really want to get married, go find a nice European girl to marry, unlike American women, at least they know that marriage is not a one way street.

I'm very interested in, comparatively speaking, the pros and cons of marrying an American man. If a society produces X kind of stereotypical woman, we may look for a Y kind of stereotypical man, which would be what?

Re: The Eligible Bachelor Paradox

#32

Post by tlb »

inglorian wrote: post #30
vaksel wrote: post #24

I think additional part of the problem is that men are starting to realize that they really don't have anything to gain by being married. And they are so afraid of having to go through a divorce that can wipe them out, that they don't feel like trying. I mean a 50% divorce rate in this country, is pretty much a coin toss on whether or not you lose everything. Seriously the only thing to gain by being married is savin…

I'm always surprised to see the extreme bitterness that comes out on these threads. >>Every single married guy I know is MISERABLE. The sex pretty much stops within the first couple of years. And the woman gains mega weight, because now that they "got" you, they don't need to keep in shape. And then the whole bitchy wife comes out treating the guy as a second class citizen. You do seem to know an awful lot of extreme…

> The divorce rate is 50%...but the failure rate of startups is even higher.

I'm not sure it is. When you see a high figure like 80% quoted for small companies failing, that's mainly due to restaurants. Serious startups founded by serious people rarely fail. (Getting acquired by a public company is like staying married your whole life.)

The failure rate of relationships is very high. If you date 20 people before getting married, that's a 95% failure rate. But it's still worth it.

Re: The Eligible Bachelor Paradox

#33

Post by nostrademons »

time_management wrote: post #25
vaksel wrote: post #22

Earlier quoted context omitted.

the looks thing is so true, after 25 women lose their looks exponentially...sure there are a few "milfs" in the 40s who still look good, but these were the 10s in the 18s who had their pick of men.

Not quite, because different women look good at different ages. Case in point: Michelle Obama looked fairly awkward as a teenager, but is beautiful in her 40s.

Yeah, I've noticed this too. Some of the women I know that are quite attractive now at 22-27 were very awkward-looking at 15-17, which is the age range when all reasonably fit girls are supposed to be attractive. While some of the hotties from high school look old and washed up, even at just 25.

Re: The Eligible Bachelor Paradox

#34

Post by [deleted] »

vaksel wrote: post #24

I think additional part of the problem is that men are starting to realize that they really don't have anything to gain by being married. And they are so afraid of having to go through a divorce that can wipe them out, that they don't feel like trying. I mean a 50% divorce rate in this country, is pretty much a coin toss on whether or not you lose everything. Seriously the only thing to gain by being married is savin…

[deleted]

Re: The Eligible Bachelor Paradox

#35

Post by eru »

time_management wrote: post #27
vaksel wrote: post #24

I think additional part of the problem is that men are starting to realize that they really don't have anything to gain by being married. And they are so afraid of having to go through a divorce that can wipe them out, that they don't feel like trying. I mean a 50% divorce rate in this country, is pretty much a coin toss on whether or not you lose everything. Seriously the only thing to gain by being married is savin…

And they are so afraid of having to go through a divorce that can wipe them out, that they don't feel like trying. Yep. It's an utterly broken system where the wife can decide she's not into her husband any more and walk away with half of his shit. Every single married guy I know is MISERABLE. The sex pretty much stops within the first couple of years. And the woman gains mega weight, because now that they "got" you,…

Are you always that critical of your female compatriots?

Re: The Eligible Bachelor Paradox

#36

Post by trapper »

tlb wrote: post #32
inglorian wrote: post #30

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'm always surprised to see the extreme bitterness that comes out on these threads. >>Every single married guy I know is MISERABLE. The sex pretty much stops within the first couple of years. And the woman gains mega weight, because now that they "got" you, they don't need to keep in shape. And then the whole bitchy wife comes out treating the guy as a second class citizen. You do seem to know an awful lot of extreme…

> The divorce rate is 50%...but the failure rate of startups is even higher. I'm not sure it is. When you see a high figure like 80% quoted for small companies failing, that's mainly due to restaurants. Serious startups founded by serious people rarely fail. (Getting acquired by a public company is like staying married your whole life.) The failure rate of relationships is very high. If you date 20 people before gett…

Where do you get your figures?

Re: The Eligible Bachelor Paradox

#37

Post by randallsquared »

nostrademons wrote: post #33
time_management wrote: post #25

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Not quite, because different women look good at different ages. Case in point: Michelle Obama looked fairly awkward as a teenager, but is beautiful in her 40s.

Yeah, I've noticed this too. Some of the women I know that are quite attractive now at 22-27 were very awkward-looking at 15-17, which is the age range when all reasonably fit girls are supposed to be attractive. While some of the hotties from high school look old and washed up, even at just 25.

Your "awkward" may be what others refer to as "cute".

Re: The Eligible Bachelor Paradox

#38

Post by ahpeeyem »

time_management wrote: post #27
vaksel wrote: post #24

I think additional part of the problem is that men are starting to realize that they really don't have anything to gain by being married. And they are so afraid of having to go through a divorce that can wipe them out, that they don't feel like trying. I mean a 50% divorce rate in this country, is pretty much a coin toss on whether or not you lose everything. Seriously the only thing to gain by being married is savin…

And they are so afraid of having to go through a divorce that can wipe them out, that they don't feel like trying. Yep. It's an utterly broken system where the wife can decide she's not into her husband any more and walk away with half of his shit. Every single married guy I know is MISERABLE. The sex pretty much stops within the first couple of years. And the woman gains mega weight, because now that they "got" you,…

"suburban-bred office cows"

that is gold :)

Re: The Eligible Bachelor Paradox

#40

Post by Xichekolas »

inglorian wrote: post #30
vaksel wrote: post #24

I think additional part of the problem is that men are starting to realize that they really don't have anything to gain by being married. And they are so afraid of having to go through a divorce that can wipe them out, that they don't feel like trying. I mean a 50% divorce rate in this country, is pretty much a coin toss on whether or not you lose everything. Seriously the only thing to gain by being married is savin…

I'm always surprised to see the extreme bitterness that comes out on these threads. >>Every single married guy I know is MISERABLE. The sex pretty much stops within the first couple of years. And the woman gains mega weight, because now that they "got" you, they don't need to keep in shape. And then the whole bitchy wife comes out treating the guy as a second class citizen. You do seem to know an awful lot of extreme…

> I'm always surprised to see the extreme bitterness that comes out on these threads.

My guess (although I don't know vaksel at all) is that he is reflecting somewhat on his parents marriage.

I only say this because my parent's marriage was often so. While my mom has settled a bit with age, while I was growing up she used the threat of divorce as a weapon to settle arguments with my dad. She also tended to make stupid financial decisions (running up $8k in credit card debt on clothes when she had no job and without my dad knowing she even had a card) from which he would have to bail her out.

I often struggle with this innate fear I have that marriage means signing away all my earnings and being constantly treated as a child by my wife. For this reason I tend to choose extremely independent girlfriends, and ambition is one of my top attractors.

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