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The Price of Happiness (2024)

happiness-science.org

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Re: The Price of Happiness (2024)

#31

Post by hankbond »

skeeter2020 wrote: post #28
hankbond wrote: post #11

This may be a very tone deaf thing to say, but what really helps me is to just tell myself I am happy. It's certainly not fool-proof when faced with genuine problems, but I often find myself unhappy or annoyed for no particular reason. In those moments I just tell myself I have everything I need and life is great, and then it just feels better. That said all the findings that these studies seem to gravitate towards l…

that doesn't feel tone deaf to me, and is a legit strategy to kick-start deeper happiness and satisfaction. I a huge component of money-related unhappiness to me appears to be context, i.e. people who need more.

I feel like it's directionally like telling depressed people to just "stop being depressed". Works for me because of where I'm at currently but idk how generalizable it is.

Re: The Price of Happiness (2024)

#32

Post by jongjong »

Money definitely buys happiness for me. But I resent the amount of competition and how much bs I have to put up with to get it. It's definitely eroding the happiness. Especially when you engage in all the bs for years and still don't get much more money.

Re: The Price of Happiness (2024)

#33

Post by thelastgallon »

People work hard for academic and career success. This will take decades. The plan is to make a lot of money with that success, have costly things/hobbies and derive happiness. It is driven by money as social status, which allows you to buy costly things and signal to others about your success.

Instead, find joy in cheap hobbies and ignore the status markers. Just do things for yourself, not for others.

Re: The Price of Happiness (2024)

#34

Post by intellix »

I think as long as you're not depressed because you don't have enough money I've seen people with much much less happier than extremely wealthy people.

I know someone extremely wealthy and he continuously says that he's bored, is depressed yet wants to make more.

Meanwhile I work daily with people on a normal/content wage and I feel like they're generally happier people?

I know people really struggling financially and they're constantly depressed.

Re: The Price of Happiness (2024)

#35

Post by jongjong »

AnimalMuppet wrote: post #21
jongjong wrote: post #20

Earlier quoted context omitted.

For most people, freedom is the only missing piece holding them back from being happy so that distinction melts away for them.

Freedom is the only missing piece holding them back from pursuing what they think will make them happy. That freedom makes them happy today, happy with the hope of tomorrow's happiness. But a number of people find that pursuing that thing (whatever it is for them) doesn't actually make them happy. Now they're less happy, because not only are they not happy, but their dream of future happiness has also died.

I don't know about other people but certainly not for me. I was actually earning crypto passive income for 3 years not working and I was very happy. Now that income is gone, through no fault of my own (literally this was the best case scenario how it could have played out), and I now have to work for money again and I'm very unhappy.

I'm even more unhappy now because my life expectations are higher and I can't get to that level again until I'm 65...

Hearing people tell me this nonsense about money and happiness makes me even more miserable because my conclusion is "They don't appreciate money, yet they are given money... I very much appreciate money, yet I'm not given money..."

From my perspective, it seems almost like the system is only giving money to people who are incapable of appreciating it... Meanwhile I know from past evidence how I felt when I had money + time and that feeling was happiness. I knew it then, I know it now.

Re: The Price of Happiness (2024)

#36

Post by sokka_h2otribe »

gib444 wrote: post #8
throw0101d wrote: post #2

Harvard has been running longitudinal studies for several decades: * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grant_Study and their findings lean towards good relationships with family and friends are highly correlation with happiness, health, and many aspects of financial success. The released a book summarizing many results a few years ago: * https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/61273746-the-good-life * https://archive.is/http…

> and their findings lean towards good relationships with family and friends are highly correlation with happiness, health, and many aspects of financial success The daily reminder about the pains of autism and depression :/

If you can, consider to volunteer at a shelter or any volunteer activity that you find accessible to you.

I say this specifically because giving to others is undervalued for its internal benefits, and animals tend to be more accessible to direct love towards than humans with their complexities. But overall just giving is a way of transferring some of yourself into a more together context, and volunteering tends to be socially easier than like hanging at a bar or something...idk, just another autistic person who has/does struggle with depression in many contexts.

Volunteer at a cat shelter for e.g was only a tiny part of my burn out recovery process but it was still a really important catalyst and component. Maybe you can have some similar experiences too! Or maybe your own experiences are very different and it's not valuable for you, I'm sorry.

If you want I can ramble more about structural reasons for why this is a very good idea for autism+depression, but the point is really 'one extremely small and accessible suggestion' and so I don't want to overcomplicate it more.

Anyway if animals can't work for you, any other volunteering and/or metta/ loving-kindness meditation would be my second recommendations.

But it's really important for the volunteering bits that you are not maximizing efficiency. It is certainly 10X more impact if I was to work$ and donate that to the cat shelter. But in terms of the thematic healing goal, it is more important I spend time scooping poop for the cat gods at the shelter almost precisely because it's not a utility-value driven experience. Giving unto others, etc.

Re: The Price of Happiness (2024)

#37

Post by qsera »

asdfman123 wrote: post #15
gib444 wrote: post #8

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> and their findings lean towards good relationships with family and friends are highly correlation with happiness, health, and many aspects of financial success The daily reminder about the pains of autism and depression :/

I read a great quote by someone, maybe Nietzsche, suggesting that when you encounter that which you struggle with you tell yourself the equivalent of "hell yeah, this is my struggle." This is prime time. This is what I'm currently on earth to solve. I'm going to enjoy the process of trying to defeat it. Amor fati. Of course, you don't have to think that way. But you're going to have one problem or another, either way…

I do this, or in other words, I had to do this to go on. I think everyone comes up with some philosophy to keep on going. Even a street bum might have come up with philosophy on par with some of the greats that keeps them going...

In fact, for this particular idea, I am so over the edge that I sometimes feel pity for those conventionally lucky people who seemingly have it all and don't have a struggle on their on. I mean, what is the point of their life? But I find consolation in the possibility that they might have hidden struggles...

Re: The Price of Happiness (2024)

#38

Post by Nevermark »

> a linear association between happiness and Log(income) implies that the marginal utility of additional dollars diminishes exponentially, though never mathematically plateaus

And income (or wealth increase) can go up exponentially with wealth, so hitting the point where wealth just grows = linear increases in happiness relative to time?

Re: The Price of Happiness (2024)

#39

Post by Nevermark »

asdfman123 wrote: post #15
gib444 wrote: post #8

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> and their findings lean towards good relationships with family and friends are highly correlation with happiness, health, and many aspects of financial success The daily reminder about the pains of autism and depression :/

I read a great quote by someone, maybe Nietzsche, suggesting that when you encounter that which you struggle with you tell yourself the equivalent of "hell yeah, this is my struggle." This is prime time. This is what I'm currently on earth to solve. I'm going to enjoy the process of trying to defeat it. Amor fati. Of course, you don't have to think that way. But you're going to have one problem or another, either way…

The wall is the way.

Things move faster once you discover/can see your next problem(s) clearly. Is another way to put it.

Re: The Price of Happiness (2024)

#40

Post by tonyedgecombe »

DaveZale wrote: post #17

Great analysis, but I would probably add that most (but not all) of those who end up with the six- and seven- figure salaries are smarter, more well-connected and socially adjusted, optimistic etc. Most _not_ all. And some are just really good bullshitters, of course. Ever been to a third world country and seen happy people who make just a couple hundred bucks a month, yet are very healthy and happy? I have. It's ver…

Having a couple of hundred bucks a month is fine when everybody around you has the same. It's hard to ignore when people around you have ten or a hundred times as much as you, especially when they start to shape society around themselves.
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