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Don't be a scary old guy: My 40s survival strategy with charm
31–40 of 71 posts
Re: Don't be a scary old guy: My 40s survival strategy with charm
#32Jesus. If at 40 you're already seeing yourself old and worried about survival something must be wrong. At 40 you're barely at the halfway point of your career since we're gonna have to work till our 70's anyway, so buckle up for another 30+ years.
"Forty is the old age of youth. Fifty is the youth of old age."
The thing about 40 is, you're not old, but you see your youth dying. If your identity is in being young, sexy, fit, athletic, then that may be brutal. Depends on what your identity is in, and how you handle the loss of it.
Re: Don't be a scary old guy: My 40s survival strategy with charm
#33Jesus. If at 40 you're already seeing yourself old and worried about survival something must be wrong. At 40 you're barely at the halfway point of your career since we're gonna have to work till our 70's anyway, so buckle up for another 30+ years.
"Forty is the old age of youth. Fifty is the youth of old age." The thing about 40 is, you're not old, but you see your youth dying. If your identity is in being young, sexy, fit, athletic, then that may be brutal . Depends on what your identity is in, and how you handle the loss of it.
Good news is, I was never sexy, fit or athletic, so I will never be disappointed.
Re: Don't be a scary old guy: My 40s survival strategy with charm
#34Best advice on this topic:
How to Age Gracefully | CBC Radio https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sycgL3Qg_Ak
[Spoiler]
"Dear 91-year old, don't listen to other people's advice.
Nobody knows what the hell they're doing.
Signed, a 93-year old."
[Edit]
This was originally passed down to me through RSS from:
Re: Don't be a scary old guy: My 40s survival strategy with charm
#35I seem to have become scarier in my old age. People seem to pay more attention and react more strongly to me than they used to, but all I did was get older and uglier. Whatever physicality I had has waned, but moral presence among strangers has waxed. Maybe it's a remaining respect for elders rather than something to do with me. But it has made me more careful with hiding my grumpiness.
Sometime in my late 30's or early 40's I noticed that groups started deferring to me as the arbiter of disputes and decision maker. They also stopped being as playful with me.
I hadn't changed my personality significantly, and I was baffled for a long time. Then I realized that I had become a 40 something man with a touch of grey and some gravel in his voice.
Somewhere along the way people had just automatically started thinking of me as the Boss archetype instead of the Bro archetype.
It was startling to me that my dumbass opinion was suddenly being held in higher regard due to the simple expedient of becoming old.
Re: Don't be a scary old guy: My 40s survival strategy with charm
#36These are the standard realisations of a teenager
Oof
Re: Don't be a scary old guy: My 40s survival strategy with charm
#37I seem to have become scarier in my old age. People seem to pay more attention and react more strongly to me than they used to, but all I did was get older and uglier. Whatever physicality I had has waned, but moral presence among strangers has waxed. Maybe it's a remaining respect for elders rather than something to do with me. But it has made me more careful with hiding my grumpiness.
Hear hear.
Re: Don't be a scary old guy: My 40s survival strategy with charm
#38Re: Don't be a scary old guy: My 40s survival strategy with charm
#39I hate to admit this but balding has been a really really stressful thing for me getting into 40. I didn't think it would be, I hardly looked in the mirror at the best of times during my 20s and 30s, but I've been rapidly balding over the past 2/3 years and I can see by this time next year...I'll be bald. I'm at the point I've been considering going to turkey, but I think the most surprising thing to me is just now m…
Finasteride and minoxidil are a lifesaver
Well, there are risks associated with these unfortunately.
Re: Don't be a scary old guy: My 40s survival strategy with charm
#40Regardless of agreeing with the advice, a 41yo giving advice on surviving the 40s seems a bit arrogant. Being 41 is different from 46 which is different from 49, and he just doesn't know yet. The right title should be "how I feel after a year in my 40s".
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