No Instagram, no privacy • Hacker News Board

Re: No Instagram, no privacy

#31

Post by lostmsu » Mon, May 05, 2025, 5:18 PM UTC

alwa wrote: post #9

paxys wrote: post #4

"I went on a weekend trip and didn't invite friend A, so I hope friend B keeps it a secret and doesn't tell anyone I was there" is the kind of social dynamic that people grow out of in high school. If you are having trouble with it as an adult then it isn't really Instagram's fault. People talk to each other and share stuff, and sometimes they talk about you, both online and offline. Just live your life without being…

There’s value in grace. For all sorts of reasons you might be right to do things that make other people feel bad. That’s no reason to rub their nose in it. What’s the virtue in offending people when you could instead be kind? I know one woman who is having a baby shower, and I know another woman who recently dealt with the loss of her child. It’s not “secrecy” to celebrate the baby shower and avoid bringing it up wit…

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Re: No Instagram, no privacy

#32

Post by barbazoo » Mon, May 05, 2025, 5:20 PM UTC

igor47 wrote: post #2

i've thought the same thing about email. i run my own email server, so i'm one of a very few number of people whose email is opaque to gmail. on the other hand -- almost everyone i exchange email with uses gmail, so actually gmail has almost all my email anyway.

Interesting. I never thought about adjusting my message based on the email provider they use. Would be hard to do, someone could be using their own domain but the email goes through Gmail.

Re: No Instagram, no privacy

#33

Post by jjulius » Mon, May 05, 2025, 5:20 PM UTC

firefoxd wrote: post #6

The social etiquette argument has been thrown away with the bath water. You are now the weirdo with something to hide when you are not on Instagram or Tiktok. The term I like is Social Cooling, the subtle way in which people change their behavior because they are both present in person and online. Have you ever heard some use the term "unalive" in person? It's as if they are protecting themselves from an algorithm, a…

>You are now the weirdo with something to hide when you are not on Instagram or Tiktok.

You might call me a "weirdo", but this has absolutely not been my experience whatsoever. Friends, family and coworkers don't really give a shit that I don't participate in social media, and I haven't been treated any differently for it.

Edit: And hell, generally, what's life without a bit of weird? The homogeneity of everyone doing the same thing together all the time sounds boring as hell. Here's to the weirdos!

Re: No Instagram, no privacy

#34

Post by lostmsu » Mon, May 05, 2025, 5:22 PM UTC

timcobb wrote: post #22

This reminded me of the time ~10 years ago I was at an event featuring Richard Stallman, and he started by say that no one was allowed to post photos of him on FB. This was to a room of hundreds of people, mostly hackers. I thought, "damn, if there's an uphill battle somewhere, this guy will find it!"

In US, if that was a private event, his request is legally binding.

Re: No Instagram, no privacy

#35

Post by sannysanoff » Mon, May 05, 2025, 5:22 PM UTC

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Re: No Instagram, no privacy

#36

Post by [deleted] » Mon, May 05, 2025, 5:23 PM UTC

alwa wrote: post #12

firefoxd wrote: post #6

The social etiquette argument has been thrown away with the bath water. You are now the weirdo with something to hide when you are not on Instagram or Tiktok. The term I like is Social Cooling, the subtle way in which people change their behavior because they are both present in person and online. Have you ever heard some use the term "unalive" in person? It's as if they are protecting themselves from an algorithm, a…

Have you had that experience, of being taken as a weirdo? We may move in very different circles, but when I ask to be left out of social media posts I’m always met with respect and understanding, at least to my face. If anything, in recent years, I’m met with something closer to the respect people afford recovering addicts turning down drinks: “oh man, I wish I were off of it too, good for you.”

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Re: No Instagram, no privacy

#37

Post by delusional » Mon, May 05, 2025, 5:24 PM UTC

timcobb wrote: post #22

This reminded me of the time ~10 years ago I was at an event featuring Richard Stallman, and he started by say that no one was allowed to post photos of him on FB. This was to a room of hundreds of people, mostly hackers. I thought, "damn, if there's an uphill battle somewhere, this guy will find it!"

Knowing Richard Stallman he didn't ask for you not to upload them to Facebook but rather "Disgracebook", "FaceBurgler" or something like that.

Re: No Instagram, no privacy

#38

Post by mvdtnz » Mon, May 05, 2025, 5:25 PM UTC

He wants to hang out with friends, but he wants his friends to never speak of it with their other friends?

Re: No Instagram, no privacy

#39

Post by bobismyuncle » Mon, May 05, 2025, 5:27 PM UTC

lostmsu wrote: post #34

timcobb wrote: post #22

This reminded me of the time ~10 years ago I was at an event featuring Richard Stallman, and he started by say that no one was allowed to post photos of him on FB. This was to a room of hundreds of people, mostly hackers. I thought, "damn, if there's an uphill battle somewhere, this guy will find it!"

In US, if that was a private event, his request is legally binding.

How would this work in practice if it was litigated? Wouldn't you need proof that this was expressly communicated to the specific individual that violated and that they did so knowingly? Seems like it probably isn't enforceable...

Re: No Instagram, no privacy

#40

Post by delusional » Mon, May 05, 2025, 5:27 PM UTC

AndriyKunitsyn wrote: post #18

igor47 wrote: post #2

i've thought the same thing about email. i run my own email server, so i'm one of a very few number of people whose email is opaque to gmail. on the other hand -- almost everyone i exchange email with uses gmail, so actually gmail has almost all my email anyway.

Did you have any problems with Gmail not trusting your server and moving your letters to spam?

I've been running a mail server for years. Never had any problem. I switched ip a year or two ago and didn't even warm up the new one. I do have DKIM and DMARC and that stuff though.

I'm sure you'll have some problems if you start serving newsletters right away, but as a personal mail server, you don't really need to do anything.

I even fucked up the config at one point for a week, and all the mail just patiently waited on the senders mail server for mine to be up again. I really love email.