31–40 of 87 posts
Some day an honest conversation about how in our current internet landscape boys learn about sex through consuming hardcore pornography before they even kiss someone and whether that's something we want as a society needs to happen.
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Yeah, she doesn't explicitly condone rape, but you're a Very Horrible Person if she can't pressure you into sex. Also, yes, dating effectively means sex and trying to defend a rapist by splitting hairs makes you horrible.
date != sex Thomas Jefferson didn’t date black women but didn’t have a problem having sex with one his slaves (allegedly)
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I read this differently As in the therapy example: attraction might develop between the student & teacher. Instead of participating, the teacher should recognize/be aware that this exist but channel it back toward learning
Seems weird to me. Of course it started from Freud. I'm not outright discounting it (not like I have any evidence to) but it rubs me the wrong way that attraction would even be considered as part of the learning process. Not that the kind of power dynamic described between professors and students is great either.
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The author questions whether men are "entitled" to their own bodies. Saying people's preferences are "Problematic" is a way to pressure them into sex: "You're a horrible person if you don't have sex with me!"
Yes and if you'd continued to read the article, you would have noticed that this situation is used as an example about the problematic aspects of sexuality in our society -- its a segue to an argument, not the argument itself. > You are not entitled to sex with anyone, but people can have preferences that are problematic You rather took this one line out of context and interpreted in the worst possible way.
I also find it sexist that both examples of racial preferences involve men, when it's well-established that women have stronger racial preferences than men, for example, white women prefer white men over Asian men (the least desirable group of men) by a much larger margin than white men prefer white women over Black women (the least desirable group of women). You could probably do the Grindr experiment on Tinder and find that the white man has an easier matching with women than the Asian man (especially if "Asian" means "Indian man" and not "K-pop idol dreamboat").
It's also strange to focus on men, when women are the pickier gender, especially when it comes to sex but to lesser extent also when it comes to dating. Even the undesirable black woman probably has an easier time hooking up than most white men.
Of course, it all makes sense when you realize that most modern-day feminists are only interested in pointing out the “problematic” behavior of men and how it impacts women, and never the other way around.
Finally, you phrased it as “THE problematic aspects of sexuality in our society” but the crux is that defining WHICH aspects are problematic is itself subjective and political. In Western society feminism dominates the institutions, so we get the result that "men rejecting black women" is problematic and "women rejecting Asian men" is not problematic. Of course, this isn't at all objective.
Vouched for this because I don't see any reason why this was flagged. Sorry if I overlooked something.
Okay I'm half joking, but this crowd of people is simply incapable of having such discussions without the thread turning into a pile of garbage very quickly because of a no-no word in the title. (Not talking about the word sex, but feminism.)
I love having such discussions, but it's not happening here for my own sanity.
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[flagged]
True, but I really don't think the article in question is that divisive or out of touch with reality. Its a simple book review, with a balanced approach to the subject
Vouched for this because I don't see any reason why this was flagged. Sorry if I overlooked something.
I'm tired of everything being flagged on HN that has even a 1% chance of painting feminism or something female-related in a negative light. I believe the community at large is able to have an honest discussion, but a certain minority of users keep shutting it down by flagging submissions before it even has a chance to begin.
The essayist sounds like a typical academic subversive. She offers no answers or theories, only questions, aka "...the politics of X" . In other words, she only "problematizes". Let's see: She offers a clinical yet sexually charged analysis of porn with no policy proposals (heaven forbid). Could there be a greater cliche in the Humanities departments of modern universities? Oh wait, of course she wants safe, legal se…
Why is that a problem? As long as people aren't coerced/forced into it, where's the harm?
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Yes and if you'd continued to read the article, you would have noticed that this situation is used as an example about the problematic aspects of sexuality in our society -- its a segue to an argument, not the argument itself. > You are not entitled to sex with anyone, but people can have preferences that are problematic You rather took this one line out of context and interpreted in the worst possible way.
You are missing the point: saying that some preferences are problematic while others are not by itself creates an unfair double standard, even if you pay lip-service to the idea of individual right to consent. When a man rejects a woman because she's obese, that's problematic. When a woman rejects a man because he's short, that's not problematic. I also find it sexist that both examples of racial preferences involve…
Vouched for this because I don't see any reason why this was flagged. Sorry if I overlooked something.
Because social studies scare HN readers. Okay I'm half joking, but this crowd of people is simply incapable of having such discussions without the thread turning into a pile of garbage very quickly because of a no-no word in the title. (Not talking about the word sex, but feminism.) I love having such discussions, but it's not happening here for my own sanity.