> My ego creates a tight bond between my work and my identity. Linking my self worth to how well I do my job. Same experience here, and probably for a lot of devs. It took a good 10 years or so to break out of this. If I couldn't get something working that I expected to work, I silently took it out on myself. Must not be good/smart enough. And so I'd beat my head against the wall. Once I started letting broken code o…
On Coding, Ego and Attention
31–40 of 177 posts
Re: On Coding, Ego and Attention
#32I often find the solution to many of my problems is to go back and practice from this mindset. I coincidentally went back and reread selections from this book a couple weeks ago, as I found my ego had been creeping into many facets of my life recently and I needed to go back and be reminded to practice with this mindset.
Re: On Coding, Ego and Attention
#33This is really good. Not much else to say here, other than ‘thank you’.
Re: On Coding, Ego and Attention
#34Re: On Coding, Ego and Attention
#35Early in my software engineering career I would constantly and painfully wonder if I was actually capable of fixing a certain bug or solving a new or difficult problem. But then after working hard on a solution, 99% of the time it would work out. After going through this process of debilitating self-doubt and eventual success over the course of years, it has become much more manageable.
I still sometimes panic when initially faced with a very difficult programming problem, but I can put those fears to rest much more easily by saying, "ok, I've solved hard problems before. I may not know how to solve this particular problem yet, but I feel confident that I will be able to figure it out just like I did in the past with difficult problems X, Y and Z."
At the risk of sounding pedantic, part of leaving the beginner phase — and the true value of experience — is developing a kind of armor against those feelings of inadequacy (of course you don't want this to go too far into feelings of overconfidence or an inability to reflect when things do go wrong).
I also think it's the responsibility of more senior engineers to recognize when a more junior teammate might be having those self-doubts and be empathetic while helping them build up their own successes.
Re: On Coding, Ego and Attention
#36"This is ego distraction. It’s about putting off uncertainty till later to buy temporary relief. To protect our ego from a perceived threat. Things like hard problems, the possibility of failing publicly, or negative feedback all become threats when they’re linked to my identity." I disagree with this [at least for me personally]. Being a good programmer is just straight up not something that's part of my identity. T…
Many Zen Buddhists know how long and hard practice for mastery is. Practicing meditation is in many ways skill acquisition as well, which is why it is called a practice.
You’ll of course be spending years and years practicing programming, and the insight that ego identification gets in the way and one must practice beginners mind is a simple yet deep understanding that comes from years and years of practice.
Re: On Coding, Ego and Attention
#37Re: On Coding, Ego and Attention
#38"This is ego distraction. It’s about putting off uncertainty till later to buy temporary relief. To protect our ego from a perceived threat. Things like hard problems, the possibility of failing publicly, or negative feedback all become threats when they’re linked to my identity." I disagree with this [at least for me personally]. Being a good programmer is just straight up not something that's part of my identity. T…
Then why did you call yourself "good", why not just a programmer? ;-)
Re: On Coding, Ego and Attention
#39"This is ego distraction. It’s about putting off uncertainty till later to buy temporary relief. To protect our ego from a perceived threat. Things like hard problems, the possibility of failing publicly, or negative feedback all become threats when they’re linked to my identity." I disagree with this [at least for me personally]. Being a good programmer is just straight up not something that's part of my identity. T…
The point of the article isn't that there is a shortcut around having to put in the time, it is that ego sabotages your efforts to put in the time, and if you're somehow coerced into spending the time anyway can prevent you from receiving the expected benefit (eg. just staring at the code on the screen probably won't help, unless the problem is literally a typo).
Re: On Coding, Ego and Attention
#40I feel like for me, reading and writing articles like this are a major source of distractions. I often find myself reading articles like this, lessons of self-improvement and tips of motivation and ways to be a better programmer, instead of doing what actually makes me a better programmer (actually programming). To extend upon the article, I feel like one of the easiest distractions from self improvement is constantl…
The thing about working on yourself is that it’s actually work. Reading an article, or a book on behaviour, self-improvement and what else doesn’t actually change you any more than reading Harry Potter does. It’s the years of applying Zen Buddhism, scheduling your chores or staring at the mirror telling yourself you’re a great person that changes you. I know because I recently recorded from a major depression and anx…