"The goal of the military is to settle international conflict through violence." That is misleading. The purpose of the military is to safeguard the interests of our country through its presence and--if necessary--decisive violence. No US military leader wants to fight a war; that notion is absurd. Don't confuse the desires of the military with the occasional desires of its civilian leadership.
With respect, that amount to much of the same with different words. Not that I disagree with you or him, just pointing out that to me you two differ in you points of view, not in substance.
They are describing two different intents; one is to seek to settle conflict through the use of violence, and the other is to accomplish the same end through the ability to inflict violence. The latter does not presume an innate desire to use the instruments of violence, only the will and ability to do so if so instructed.
Deterrence is a real thing and not the same thing as being bloodthirsty.