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To Change Habits, Try Replacement Instead

nytimes.com

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Re: To Change Habits, Try Replacement Instead

#31

Post by goldenkey »

BiancaDelRio wrote: post #20
scarface74 wrote: post #12

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I agree completely. I spent years as a fitness instructor and worked out regularly. Life happened, I stopped teaching and working out consistently for five years and everything went south, weight, blood pressure, strength, cardio, cholesterol, etc. I tried to "turn things around" and failed. First step first 6 months - I cut back on fried foods, salty foods, burgers, and sweets and kept a sane calorie budget. Along w…

> I cut back on fried foods That's the only 100% banned item in my diet because fried stuff makes my skin look ashen and ugly. Whenever fried foods come up in conversations everyone immediately assumes I am talking about fats vs carbs and proteins. Google does too. I can eat most any fats, even butter sticks, no problem. I was wondering if anyone knows why fried foods are so bad.

It sounds like you might just be allergic to certain types of oil. No need for wooey explanations.

Also but not likely to be the reason for your symptoms - cooking with vegetable oils releases toxic chemicals linked to cancer and other diseases,

Re: To Change Habits, Try Replacement Instead

#32

Post by dennisgorelik »

scarface74 wrote: post #12
evanmarshall wrote: post #9

I think attacking one problem at a time is the best way to go about (at least for me). I noticed that many people try to make drastic changes all at once and then fail at all of them. I'd recommend trying one thing and just doing that one thing above all else. IE, don't try to exercise and diet at the same time. Pick one and when you've firmly established the habit, start the next change.

I agree completely. I spent years as a fitness instructor and worked out regularly. Life happened, I stopped teaching and working out consistently for five years and everything went south, weight, blood pressure, strength, cardio, cholesterol, etc. I tried to "turn things around" and failed. First step first 6 months - I cut back on fried foods, salty foods, burgers, and sweets and kept a sane calorie budget. Along w…

Meat is ok (if you like it).

But cut out all sodas ASAP (even diet sodas). Imagine that all sodas are addictive mild poisons. That would help you to replace sodas with water.

Stopping soda intake would probably allow you to lose another 10 pounds without extra effort.

Re: To Change Habits, Try Replacement Instead

#34

Post by UncleEntity »

darkerside wrote: post #21
tmuir wrote: post #14

There was an author named Allen Carr, an Englishman, I believe, who wrote a book called The EasyWay to Quit Smoking. I can attest to the relative ease his method provides, over quitting cold turkey. Essentially, he uses tools of psychology to reinforce his points, such as spaced repetition, but he also dissects the psychology at play inside the smoker's mind. He frames nicotene addiction as a state of brainwashing, a…

> I think I understand a lot of the general underpinnings, but I have yet to find the EasyWay to do anything else It's funny that the Easy Way to quit smoking actually discourages any kind of replacement for smoking. I tried to do it "right" and follow that direction, but eventually I started chewing gum. It felt like a failure at first, but it worked so no regrets. My realization there was, life is a series of habit…

> It's funny that the Easy Way to quit smoking actually discourages any kind of replacement for smoking.

Which seems odd to me.

I quit smoking after after (something like) 25 years by replacing it with vaping. Probably isn't all that healthy but also probably isn't going to kill me either and, meh, I like my nicotine. I've had exactly 2 cigarettes since I switched and that was in the first month or so, have no desire to smoke a cigarette even when I'm in the middle of a pack of smokers puffing away.

The main issue I've had is I turned it into a hobby so was buying a bunch of vape gear from China to try out different stuff so it was costing me a lot more than I was spending on cigarettes but I reigned that in so now I spend something like $25 every 3 weeks on e-juice. Could get that down but I really like my clouds -- actually get smokers asking me about that because they tried out vaping but weren't satisfied then see me chucking a big cloud and are like "that's what I want".

So, yeah, replacement totally worked in my case...still addicted but they'll have to pry my caffeine and nicotine from my cold, dead hands because I actually like them.

Re: To Change Habits, Try Replacement Instead

#35

Post by jrowley »

iancmceachern wrote: post #15
namuol wrote: post #6

Disclaimer: I am not a doctor and if you are suffering emotionally/mentally please seek professional help. ---- My anecdote: I used to frequently suffer from (undiagnosed) anxiety and depression. For about a year, I would respond to sudden anxiety by seeking comfort in various forms of isolation/depressed behavior (watch TV as a distraction, try to take a "nap", etc.). The most insidious thing about this was how it s…

Me too, only with running. It's a great way to force yourself to take time for meditation, reflection and processing the days events. For me it's my time, time in which clients, other folks in my life are set aside and I can think for myself. Plus it's a way to progress, have something to be proud if even if client work, or other aspects of life aren't.

If you don’t mind me asking, how often do you feel you need to run?

Re: To Change Habits, Try Replacement Instead

#36

Post by mirimir »

goldenkey wrote: post #29
mirimir wrote: post #19

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It's arguably impossible to "stop being anxious". I mean, the harder one tries, the more anxiety. But it is possible to redirect, even in public. Perhaps adopt a centered stance. Or do something else that's unobtrusive and nonthreatening. Maybe even smile.

It is possible via behavioral therapy. Most social anxiety stems from a lack of previous success in social situations. Once you realize that people don't bite, you stop giving a shit. The public is mostly oblivious and distracted. If you think you are getting attention its far more likely that no one cares. Source: introvert who isn't scared of the mopey public anymore

Fair enough. Both are useful.

Re: To Change Habits, Try Replacement Instead

#37

Post by danielrk »

I bit my nails unconsciously for 15 years. Constantly bleeding and got to the point where my thumbnails were gone and I thought they wouldn’t ever grow back.

I got braces for my teeth, the biting immediately stopped, and my nails grew back to perfect condition in a few months. In dealing with the discomfort of braces, I developed a habit of pushing my tongue against my teeth which completely replaced my nail biting habit. (To be clear, the braces per se didn’t deter me from biting.)

I do this all the time now unconsciously. Fortunately it’s imperceptible and doesn’t do any harm.

Re: To Change Habits, Try Replacement Instead

#38

Post by fyfy18 »

Has anyone got any tips for how to stop biting nails? This technique sounds like it would work for some habits, but I do this subconciously without realising - usually when I’m deep in though on something else (not when I’m streased).

Re: To Change Habits, Try Replacement Instead

#39

Post by projektir »

dennisgorelik wrote: post #32
scarface74 wrote: post #12

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I agree completely. I spent years as a fitness instructor and worked out regularly. Life happened, I stopped teaching and working out consistently for five years and everything went south, weight, blood pressure, strength, cardio, cholesterol, etc. I tried to "turn things around" and failed. First step first 6 months - I cut back on fried foods, salty foods, burgers, and sweets and kept a sane calorie budget. Along w…

Meat is ok (if you like it). But cut out all sodas ASAP (even diet sodas). Imagine that all sodas are addictive mild poisons. That would help you to replace sodas with water. Stopping soda intake would probably allow you to lose another 10 pounds without extra effort.

> Imagine that all sodas are addictive mild poisons.

I feel like this just doesn't work, like, at all. "Poison" is a strong term, and as bad as soda can be, it just isn't a poison; the contrast is too strong to properly work, in my mind.

Re: To Change Habits, Try Replacement Instead

#40

Post by bernardino »

jrowley wrote: post #35
iancmceachern wrote: post #15

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Me too, only with running. It's a great way to force yourself to take time for meditation, reflection and processing the days events. For me it's my time, time in which clients, other folks in my life are set aside and I can think for myself. Plus it's a way to progress, have something to be proud if even if client work, or other aspects of life aren't.

If you don’t mind me asking, how often do you feel you need to run?

I feel I need to run every week day at 8 in the morning at my local community college’s “life fitness center” - highly recommend anyone check out their local community college’s fitness centers if you aren’t keen on normal gyms, they are usually not crowded plus they are filled with students and elderly people. Some days I vary my running, either long distance with a steady space or high intesisty interval training. I then do some light weight lifting and jumping jacks, planks, push-ups, and sit-ups.

Extensively, if I stop exercising for a two week period (which I currently am in the middle of), I’m more prone to become melancholy, sleep in till the afternoon, compare myself to others to a greater extent, have no interest in dating, have no hope for the future, etc.

But other factors also play a role in my well-being plus exercising every morning in the weekday, i.e. sleeping well, making my bed, grooming, dressing nicely, eating fruits and vegetables, drinking only water and lots unless it’s a special occasion, being outdoors (in the sun if possible) as much as I can, having my things be clean and organized, etc.

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