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The Mating Crisis Among Educated Women

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Re: The Mating Crisis Among Educated Women

#31

Post by steanne »

vowelless wrote: post #3

> They end up being forced to compete for the limited pool of educated men not just with their more numerous educated rivals, but also with less educated women whom men find desirable on other dimensions. Considering that we want to eliminate any gaps between the genders, why are educated women limited to educated men of their own ages? Why not increase the pool like men do: go for more younger, possibly less educate…

that won't expand the pool as much as you think. it widens it on the education variable, but narrowers it to men who aren't threatened by women who are more educated (and possibly higher-paid) than they are.

Re: The Mating Crisis Among Educated Women

#32

Post by nserrino »

I've noticed the preferences among my male and female friends diverging over time. In college, everyone seemed to want the same thing -- a partner that was both successful and attractive. But now as we make it to our late twenties, I noticed that they "settle" differently. My female friends increasingly prefer an older guy with a great career and my male friends a younger woman who is less accomplished than they were at their age. They both still say they want the same thing -- and I totally buy it -- but it is hard to find the perfect person so sacrifices tend to be made.

I have definitely noticed the happiest people I know, in terms of romance, found their life partner in college.

Re: The Mating Crisis Among Educated Women

#33

Post by tzahola »

lmcnish14 wrote: post #7

Why is the onus of lowering their standards being pushed on educated women? One of the issues the author states is that men increasingly go for younger women instead of ones their own age. Why do we value youth and beauty instead of education and accomplishments?

>Why do we value youth and beauty instead of education and accomplishments?

I for one, do value these traits. If I were to choose between two equally looking girls, I would choose the smarter. On the other hand, I have a strict lower bound for appearance, and no amount of education or accomplishment can compensate for being under that threshold. We can still talk about programming though!

Re: The Mating Crisis Among Educated Women

#34

Post by Santosh83 »

indescions_2017 wrote: post #28

Not the usual sort of discussion I expect to see on Edge but welcome nonetheless. Fertility services, reproductive tech is very hot right now. With women who heed the countdown of their biological clocks electing to freeze their eggs at $50K, it could also be considered a growth sector. So why not provide the spectrum of services a single professional would need to raise a family. From quality genetically screened ga…

You assume single parent upbringing is optimal? Why are 1. the world's population (as opposed to 'developed world's' population), and 2., the best for the child, not considered?

Re: The Mating Crisis Among Educated Women

#35

Post by xor1 »

steanne wrote: post #31
vowelless wrote: post #3

> They end up being forced to compete for the limited pool of educated men not just with their more numerous educated rivals, but also with less educated women whom men find desirable on other dimensions. Considering that we want to eliminate any gaps between the genders, why are educated women limited to educated men of their own ages? Why not increase the pool like men do: go for more younger, possibly less educate…

that won't expand the pool as much as you think. it widens it on the education variable, but narrowers it to men who aren't threatened by women who are more educated (and possibly higher-paid) than they are.

>men who aren't threatened by women who are more educated (and possibly higher-paid) than they are

Do these people actually exist anymore? What kind of man is really going to pass on an otherwise suitable partner just because she's more educated and makes more money than him? I can't imagine a single person I know thinking something along the lines of "yeah, she's great, but she makes more money than me, it won't work".

3 of my friends make more than their boyfriends. 2 of my friends make less than their girlfriends/wives. I sure wouldn't mind.

Re: The Mating Crisis Among Educated Women

#36

Post by Anderkent »

xor1 wrote: post #26
alva wrote: post #16

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> If men can increase their pool size, why not women? Women can, it is just they don't want to due to what the majority express as desirable characteristics. It is a sad state of affairs that make both men and women worse off. I know several women in their mid-thirties who adamantly refuse to consider long term partnership with perceived low status males (along lines of status, power, wealth and education). The main…

>Finding an "equal" man in your mid-thirties as a women is very hard. Finding an "equal" woman in your mid-thirties as a man who doesn't want to date down in terms of education, status, wealth, or mental health is just as difficult.

Of course. But most - obvsly overlapping bell curves, but on the median clear difference - men don't care about that as much.

Re: The Mating Crisis Among Educated Women

#37

Post by ghostcluster »

mannykannot wrote: post #25
Ensorceled wrote: post #9

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This is addressed in the article: "Mating psychology may not be that malleable." i.e. Biology.

Biological explanations for social phenomena are generally frowned upon these days, and they certainly have a poor track record, historically.

Both mating and sexual selection are fundamentally biological issues.

> they certainly have a poor track record, historically

Evolution: a biological explanation for a social phenomena with a poor track record, historically

Re: The Mating Crisis Among Educated Women

#38

Post by Anderkent »

Ensorceled wrote: post #9
vowelless wrote: post #3

> They end up being forced to compete for the limited pool of educated men not just with their more numerous educated rivals, but also with less educated women whom men find desirable on other dimensions. Considering that we want to eliminate any gaps between the genders, why are educated women limited to educated men of their own ages? Why not increase the pool like men do: go for more younger, possibly less educate…

This is addressed in the article: "Mating psychology may not be that malleable." i.e. Biology.

Of course that's not necessarily a bad state. Sociology is fixed, biology is mutable - http://slatestarcodex.com/2014/09/10/society-is-fixed-biolog...

Re: The Mating Crisis Among Educated Women

#39

Post by alva »

Santosh83 wrote: post #29
alva wrote: post #16

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> If men can increase their pool size, why not women? Women can, it is just they don't want to due to what the majority express as desirable characteristics. It is a sad state of affairs that make both men and women worse off. I know several women in their mid-thirties who adamantly refuse to consider long term partnership with perceived low status males (along lines of status, power, wealth and education). The main…

> Finding an "equal" man in your mid-thirties as a women is very hard. Interesting. I'd have assumed that finding an 'equal' man is pretty simple, but moving up the social ladder by marrying up is what is getting harder and harder as the pool of men 'higher' than women is shrinking while simultaneously women themselves are moving up on their own.

I think it is mostly down to perceptions of equal between the groups. I do not think that the equality is equal.

Re: The Mating Crisis Among Educated Women

#40

Post by Anderkent »

xor1 wrote: post #22
iaw wrote: post #13

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Care to explain why you feel that way? From your statement I hope that you're extremely enlightened on the topic or have first hand experience being an educated woman trying to date.

No one is entitled to being in a relationship. No one is entitled to having a partner.

And that's relevant how? Entitled or not, we generally think that if would be better if people who want relationships were in relationships.
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