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Early-Retirement Update

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291–300 of 443 posts

Re: Early-Retirement Update

#291

Post by ghaff »

kelnos wrote: post #158
pbuzbee wrote: post #109

Sounds like OP's spouse was the tipping point. If they stayed on the same page, I wonder if things would've gone differently (ignoring the medical issues which aren't trivial, of course). The OP seems content to live a life without work. For him, by far the main reason to work was for income. If you don't want to work, then why keep doing so when you no longer need income to fuel your lifestyle? Obviously people are…

Yeah, OP pointed out that he started drifting away from many of his friends because they were too focused on earning and spending as a goal in and of itself, and they were no longer compatible. But he still had a core group of friends who he still felt close to and understood his lifestyle. It's possible his spouse just didn't have that. Sure, you can always say "get better friends", but that's easier said than done,…

With respect to the friends, I also wonder how much wasn't simply friends getting older and in the natural course of events spending more time with family and other interests. That's pretty much my experience that has very little to do with different financial goals.

Re: Early-Retirement Update

#292

Post by kelnos »

corry wrote: post #86
samvher wrote: post #62

Earlier quoted context omitted.

As someone who is about to get a first child - what kind of low lows should I brace myself for?

Well, first let me say that being a parent is the best thing in my life (and there is a lot of very good stuff in my life), so don't over-index on what I'm about to say next. You'll be fine and better for it! You might have heard the quote "To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken." YMMV but the lowest of the low are the times when you feel the reality that yo…

Hell, we just adopted a kitten 4 months ago, and the realization that he'll die in 15 years or so absolutely devastated me to the point that I started crying. He ate a (plastic) feather from one of his toys last week and I couldn't sleep that night (and kept checking on him) because I was afraid it would rupture his stomach or intestines and he'd die. I imagine these sorts of feelings are magnified a thousandfold when it's a human child.

Re: Early-Retirement Update

#293

Post by kelnos »

j7ake wrote: post #249

One thing that came to mind while reading was how sensitive the "financial independence" path was to unexpected changes in life. If ones model financial independence is so fragile that "comfort spending" is not included in the analysis, then I am not quite sure one can call that strategy financial independence.

Right. I think a lot of people model their future financial needs on their current situation and current level of expenses, with moderate yearly increases, and that just isn't realistic. Even people who do take it into account don't go far enough IMO.

Then again, there are some medical diagnoses that will bankrupt you (in the US) even if you're employed and have good insurance, so I think there are some things you can safely not make part of the equation.

I can totally understand and forgive not modeling "what happens if my partner and I divorce", but it's something people need to consider.

Re: Early-Retirement Update

#294

Post by kelnos »

ghaff wrote: post #291
kelnos wrote: post #158

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Yeah, OP pointed out that he started drifting away from many of his friends because they were too focused on earning and spending as a goal in and of itself, and they were no longer compatible. But he still had a core group of friends who he still felt close to and understood his lifestyle. It's possible his spouse just didn't have that. Sure, you can always say "get better friends", but that's easier said than done,…

With respect to the friends, I also wonder how much wasn't simply friends getting older and in the natural course of events spending more time with family and other interests. That's pretty much my experience that has very little to do with different financial goals.

Definitely a fair point, and I'd certainly believe that OP & his wife's radically diverging lifestyles from their friends accelerated that often-natural process.

Re: Early-Retirement Update

#295

Post by blobbers »

sidlls wrote: post #9

I always get a kick out of people who think they’re financially independent with such a small stash. Outside some regions with relatively extreme living conditions (e.g. undeveloped and underdeveloped countries), the amount he retired with was never going to be enough to sustain even minor shocks and last the rest of his life. He had a minor shock (breakup) and a major shock (health condition) and realized this error…

If he had emigrated to Canada, he gets a 30% boost in currency and his medical bills drop to closer to $0.

1.2M is more than most people earn in a lifetime, so seems he should be set up for leanFIRE.

That said, the article seemed pretty hilarious. I think this guy might be a little bit unobservant. The cracks form early but he insists that he's blissfully happy. It seems like he didn't really know his partner that well to begin with.

Re: Early-Retirement Update

#296

Post by twiddling »

esturk wrote: post #285

Despite some in this thread decrying the author, judging him on his life choices, etc. I feel the main culprit in this case is still the healthcare issue. The problem in the US is that proper healthcare is tied to a job. If the author had proper healthcare (say offered by the Government), he may still be in retirement. For our European counterparts, ask yourself this. Would 900k euro in savings be enough for retireme…

The healthcare issue is a huge one in the US in holding back folks. The patchwork of ACA coverage still being brokered through private insurance companies is a PITA.

Re: Early-Retirement Update

#297

Post by eloff »

alexashka wrote: post #197
GordonS wrote: post #137

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Not just FIRE people, but 99% of all retirees at any age end up doing nothing of note with their time. If you spend some years just chilling and and are actually happy, then sure, why not. But there are so many retired people who do nothing, and are not happy. For example, my mother, my mother and father in law, my other father in law, my grandmother - all retired, and all do absolutely nothing but watch TV and moa…

I get it. It's all explained by one simple fact: the average IQ is 100. In today's society, how many activities are there for 100 IQ people to engage in? Are there animals to take care of? Is there land? Is there community to partake in? Are there things that need to be done by 100 IQ people? When you build society optimizing for young people to work 8 hour days or giant factories and supply chains doing everything e…

Apart from the fact that average IW has been rising dramatically, I guess your not a Forest Gump fan.

I think 100 IQ people are more capable than you realize - but it comes down to their attitude.

Re: Early-Retirement Update

#298

Post by kelnos »

varispeed wrote: post #23

This is something I cannot understand. Why would you want to retire so early? I think that would impact my mental health negatively. I just love to work and I couldn't care less about FI. I mean it's nice to have money, but this will sound cliche it will not buy you happiness. However, it is certainly better to cry in a luxury apartment than under a bridge to your dog.

Consider that "working" and "having a job" aren't necessarily the same thing. You can absolutely retire early, not have a job, but continue working. Many people would not only find that fulfilling, but very freeing, as their livelihood is no longer tied to their ability to hold a job, or the ability of their company to stay solvent.

Also consider that many people do not, like you, love to work.

Money doesn't buy happiness, but not having enough of it is a great recipe for being unhappy. I think there are coarsely three levels of personal finance:

1) You live paycheck to paycheck (or worse) and are constantly anxious about your finances.

2) You have some savings and live comfortably enough. You might want more, but not having more doesn't outright kill your happiness.

3) You have enough money that you can live comfortably, even if you decide to stop working, without much (or anything) in the way of unmet wants.

The vast majority of people are in one of the first two buckets. Getting to the third one isn't possible for most people, unfortunately, and trying to get there could actively make some people's lives worse. But all other things being equal (which is admittedly rare), the third bucket is objectively better than the second.

Re: Early-Retirement Update

#299

Post by greedo »

dash2 wrote: post #98
corry wrote: post #86

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Well, first let me say that being a parent is the best thing in my life (and there is a lot of very good stuff in my life), so don't over-index on what I'm about to say next. You'll be fine and better for it! You might have heard the quote "To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken." YMMV but the lowest of the low are the times when you feel the reality that yo…

If this deep connection is the bad stuff, what is the good stuff?

This deep connection is the good stuff. The really bad stuff is learning to let go of your kids, watching this connection change and hoping that it changes into something even deeper.

Re: Early-Retirement Update

#300

Post by psychiatrist24 »

mathgladiator wrote: post #93

The sad thing was the status grind on his partner; that's unfortunate but all too common. It seems he ended up with a more compatible partner in the end, so I'm happy for him. I recently learned there is this term called "Sigma male" where status is not interesting. Now, I don't know if it is real or just some label, but I do know people that don't care. I personally don't care, but this is after testing the waters o…

"Sadly, this is the form of status that I seek."

It just goes to show you have to pick the right peer group to achieve the things you want, as people will want most to impress their peer group.

I've often caught myself with that and Hacker News, dreaming of hacking together something that would yield a good scoring submission on HN, but ultimately would be unimportant.

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