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Female Founder Secrets: Fertility

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Re: Female Founder Secrets: Fertility

#281

The only logical answer here is youth. The younger you are the more fertile you are. This is true for both men and women, but more true for women. If you want children at some point in life then prioritize children first and early. I know, this puts your ambitious career on hold for a while and start ups require huge ambition. Still, start up opportunities will not be hyper critically different in the future than the…

> The only logical answer here is youth. No, the only real answer is that you are in no way required to reproduce. There are more than enough humans. Humanity is basically a plague.

> Humanity is basically a plague.

This succinctly states the premise behind a lot of progressive thinking.

Re: Female Founder Secrets: Fertility

#282

> Startups take much longer than you’d think before they become successful. 90% of startups fail, they NEVER become successful. Gambling on some theoretical future success is just bad advice. Also egg freezing and late age pregnancy is VERY expensive and complicated. Author herself had three miscarriages. I would suggest something else: have children between 18-25, and start self funded company while working at home.…

I don't know if there's an ideal age to have kids, but 18 has always seemed way too young to me. I know a lot of people who had kids at that age who, while they love their kids, deeply regret not waiting. You also make it sound like starting a business from home in your early 20's with kids is somehow more feasible than working a stable job. That doesn't really make sense, especially when you just talked about 90% of…

Author waited and also regrets. My point is that having kids early is much easier and cheaper, because it is at peak physical health.

Baby requires too much attention and prevents work in normal 9-5 job with fixed schedule and meetings. But it leaves enough "holes" in time table to work on something.

Re: Female Founder Secrets: Fertility

#283
post #187

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Hmm I don't think that's quite right. In order for me to continue building something nobody has built, I need it to be generating revenue. And in order to generate revenue I need to stay ahead of the competition, which probably requires not treating it like a 9-5. So yes I'm pursuing money, but not to achieve vast personal wealth, but rather to ensure my (hopefully) novel business is long-term viable.

I disagree with this - I think it's very much a reflection of the modern world being quite focused on profits and revenue - you can build an exceedingly successful thing that doesn't provide a clear revenue stream. It won't come with the glamour that other options may have but if you look at passion projects from things like open source libraries all the way down to dwarf fortress it's quite possible to make a living…

That's more of a crapshoot though. The vast majority of open source projects don't generate enough donations to sustain even a single developer. The vast majority of indie games don't experience the success of Dwarf Fortress.

A clear revenue model from the beginning makes it much more likely that you will be either A. long-term sustainable or B. call it quits before too much time is invested.

Re: Female Founder Secrets: Fertility

#284
post #242

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> All this corporate grifting and women's empowerment months will do jack shit until we figure out how to make workplaces and lives more equitable for mothers and allowing for gaps, breaks and destigmatizing time off for parents of both genders. Exactly this. Generous maternity leave and at least 0.25x paternity leave. I am not a woman, so I can't possibly begin to imagine how tough pregnancy is on a body. I also rea…

There's zero legitimate reason to gender parental leave either way. Not because "muh equality" or sexism or anything like that, but it should be "new kid == n weeks leave," whether you're the biological mother, father, adoptive parent, had a biological child via surrogate, whatever.

Totally agree.

I experienced a variation on that and learned pregnancy is not a vector space. My wife carried twins so when I asked about the "new kid == n weeks of leave" it was _not_ multiplicative. I only got n and not 2n. Boo.

Re: Female Founder Secrets: Fertility

#285

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The antinatalist point of view is incredibly damaging to the long term progress of our species.

I'm not intimately familiar with all the different strains of antinatalism, but I think that's kinda the point? an antinatalist would not consider funding existing people's retirements or possibly even the survival of the species to be sufficient justification for creating new conscious beings who cannot consent to their creation.

At which point that philosophy has completely jumped the shark.

The premise that the universe is somehow "better" with no conscious life is just silly sophistry.

Re: Female Founder Secrets: Fertility

#286
post #129
post #116

I think women have largely been presented a false promise by progressives: value and purpose is derived from work, go do what men do to be their equal. It’s not necessarily anybody’s fault, we live in a society where money is valued. But I wish we could structure society in a way such that the value of raising children, homemaking, is clearly communicated and understood. Being a mother without a snazzy career is frow…

In other nations where the state provides good childcare women have historically entered the workforce just fine. It's the US (and especially California) that drains everything possible from young families.

And a good chunk of the women entering the workforce then work for the state providing childcare for other women's children.

Re: Female Founder Secrets: Fertility

#287

Earlier quoted context omitted.

8-12 years of child rearing is very expensive. That's without even taking into compounding returns from working longer hours, seniority, experience, and investments.

The blog post starts with your same premise: pull out all the stops on working hard. It's just a choice. Why not have a startup that takes longer to grow? To make the point clear: children raised by young and growing parents and different from children raised by old and established parents. Slow startups are different from fast startups. No judgement, they are just different. But the premise that a fast startup is th…

I am the child of two young parents who had to drop out of college to raise me and my siblings, eventually on my father's "lifestyle business" when working multiple jobs didn't balance the books, so I am well aware of the tradeoffs. In my experience though it's not a question of just adjusting your lifestyle for many people, it's a question of financial survival.

My parents have not come close to being financially recovered relative to later-parents a decade after we've all left the house. The delay you are talking about compounds to absolutely massive differences in my experience. Trying to multi-task both the other "life" check boxes and your work is going to have large hidden costs on work because of these compounding advantages.

Re: Female Founder Secrets: Fertility

#288
post #67

Your whole blog resonates deeply with me. All this corporate grifting and women's empowerment months will do jack shit until we figure out how to make workplaces and lives more equitable for mothers and allowing for gaps, breaks and destigmatizing time off for parents of both genders. Instead, we talk about how sexism is the biggest problem. Sure, sexism might be annoying, but in the west, it is hardly something that…

Unfortunately I just don't think it's a tenable position to assert that women (or men) should be able to take 2-4 years off of work and not be disadvantaged in their career for doing so.

I wholeheartedly support the idea that, as a society, we ought to value childcare/child-rearing and (perhaps monetarily) support those who perform this service. But I don't believe corporations ought to be the ones making a space for that.

Re: Female Founder Secrets: Fertility

#289

Earlier quoted context omitted.

it's something that men have traditionally done, yes. it's like the beard, it's traditionally something that, in general, men have and women don't. that doesn't mean that things can't change in the future and that the change won't be for the better.

Some of my personal idols from the past are Coco Chanel, Estée Lauder and Katharine Graham. That would be women born in the 1880's, 1900's and early 1920's. While few women had the privilege required to focus on their career, it was still present. At what point should we mark something as "tradition"? Remember that the Equal Credit Opportunity Act was not a thing until 1974. Until then, banks required single, widowed…

I'm not American, so I know nothing about the equal credit opportunity, sorry.

I also think that traditions in USA is used to mean inertia ("things have always been done that way" etc.), but US are a very bad country for female workers for reasons that go beyond traditions.

My country has its share of remarkable women, Miuccia Prada is one of them and she's still alive and well, Fabiola Giannotti is Italian and the first female director of CERN, Maria Montessori (1870) the inventor of the Montessori educational method was Italian,Grazia Deledda was the second woman in history to win a Nobel price in 1926 and the first Italian woman and the list could go on, the fact is that until not long ago men and women had different jobs because it was required by the job.

See construction for example, you don't see women in construction.

Traditionally, if we talk about the entire World, means since at least hominids have settled down and started farming.

Luckily things are changing, but there's still the question: do really women want that?

I'm not questioning their abilited here, but the idea that having the choice they would chose to be part of something that men have built in their image at their rules.

For example in Scandinavia where gender equality is higher than everywhere else in the western World, women are less keen to attend STEM faculties because they are too hard for too little reward. They can make more money working as lawyers or for the government, having also more time to do what they like, including spending it raising their kids and with their families. Once they reached equality (same opportunities) they started to chose because they don't have to prove anything to the others.

EDIT: if you think about it we Italians are usually laughed of because we live with our "mamma" and talk a lot about the "famiglia", we are " those lazy Italians" but that's the reason why being a housewife here it's not a stigma. Housewives are not rewarded enough in Italy, but being one it's not the end of your social life. On the contrary in USA (in particular) not working to death is frowned upon, free time is for the lazy people, "work hard and the American dream will come true", these are the kinds of " traditions " that make it impossible to be a woman, a mother and a successful business woman, to the point that paid maternity leave is not even a right!

Here in Italy, which is not the best country in the World about maternity policies, women have 5 mandatory months of paid maternity leave during which they can't be at work, it's mandatory that they abstein from it. The period can be extended if the medical conditions require (or suggest) it.

Paradoxically younger generations that grew up on social media immersed in American culture, see things the same way and have a very hard time accepting that not being highly succesful at work (or in general) is not the end of the World and they also think that being an housewife is a failure.

full disclosure: there haven't been housewives in my family at least in the past three generations, so I am not saying it because I wish for women to stay home and take care of the kids.

Re: Female Founder Secrets: Fertility

#290
post #231

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It's not clear what you're asking for exactly, but the solution is obvious: give whatever it is that you want to provide to EVERYONE, regardless of their gender, and whether or not they actually have children. Special treatment for everyone.

This is a nice sentiment, but doing so would have unintended consequences. For example, in most top universities, they give roughly the same leave to new fathers as new mothers. New mothers use this time to care for their baby, but many new fathers use this time as an extended sabbatical/research leave. Their wives take care of the baby for the most part, and they work on their next book. Then when it comes time for…

2nd step would be a cultural change that would make it OK for men to do childrearing.

Let young boys play with dolls. Celebrate fathers who parent young kids in movies and TV shows.

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