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We Have Ruined Childhood

nytimes.com

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Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#271

Post by kerng »

lonelappde wrote: post #152
shioyama wrote: post #101

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> My close friends kids in Tokyo, Seoul, Hong Kong, Singapore, Taipei, Shanghai and Beijing spend most of their time in extra tutoring or music or painting or dance classes or something else where they have to excel. Of course this happens, but let me return to my point: it's perfectly normal to see a 5-year-old in the park on their own (here in Japan). In the U.S., the parent would be arrested . Don't try to convinc…

Please stop spreading falsehoods about America.

Its not unheard of. My friend had cops called on him by neighbors because kids where playing "unattended" by themselves in the front yard! This caused lots of trouble for the family, incl. potentially loosing custody - its insane!

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#272

Post by dvfjsdhgfv »

wizzard wrote: post #250
chrissnell wrote: post #97

I am a parent of two boys—ages 7 and 4–and I hardly recognize the negative forces that this author laments over because my wife and I have simply chosen not to raise our kids that way. When my boys get home, we get outside and do sports. We’re in the middle of (tackle) football season right now and that’s what my 7 year-old does five days a week for two hours every evening. It’s exercise, fun, camaraderie, and lesson…

> For much of this, we have over-involved, over-concerned mothers to thank (and a bunch of dads that think like moms). What a hateful, sexist notion to put in the middle of an otherwise articulate comment.

I wouldn't generalize it like the parent, but it's dfinitely true for ma and many of my friends. Our mothers were very involved and concerned, our fathers - less so. They wouldn't worry that much that something bad would happen. The attitude towards risk is a known differentiator between the two sexes, so there is some truth in that otherwise a bit politically incorrect and impolite statement.

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#273

Post by ip26 »

wingspar wrote: post #147
api wrote: post #121

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> The 24/7 fear cycle of news has drilled it into so many peoples minds that if you see someone anywhere on your street outside, they are there to murder, rob, mutilate, or otherwise commit crime. Join NextDoor.com if you want a dose of how nuts people have gone. I live in Orange County CA and I have checked it from time to time. Apparently this place is a crime infested jungle full of human trafficking gangs that ab…

Do you think the paranoia leads to lower crime, via vigilance and reporting? And/or does the actual crime lead to ‘acceptance’ as displayed in the Anaheim boards? Perhaps a manifestation of the broken windows theory? https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Broken_windows_theory

My suspicion is more like allergy theory, wherein if most of your life has no allergens (e.g. no pets, city life) then when you encounter the tiniest of allergens (a suspicious teenager wearing a hoodie) your system goes on total self paralyzing freakout (anaphylaxis).

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#275

Post by kortilla »

masonic wrote: post #240
moultano wrote: post #236

Earlier quoted context omitted.

"During a meal at a restaurant" is the time parents are most likely to get them out. Don't assume that generalizes to when they're at home and have lots of options of what to do while waiting for dinner. Keeping kids quiet and happy while they're hungry and waiting is the hardest part of going out to eat with young kids. We use crayons and paper, but I don't think that's so intrinsically better than an iPad.

That's fine, when it never becomes the all-purpose go-to pacifier. I remember being at an NHL game where a kid was immersed in his device the entire night, despite being in a $148 seat to (IMHO) the most attention-maintaining of all sports. Having never been taken to a major league sporting event for my entire childhood, seeing this saddened me.

NHL is horribly boring for small children, as are most professional sports. The rules don’t make much sense, the games last way too long, the seats are not child friendly, etc.

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#276

Post by kortilla »

weiming wrote: post #74
roasm wrote: post #65

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Sometimes, my kids will say they're bored. My response to them is that my job is not to entertain them. They totally get it, though sometimes they're still bored...

Why not plan an activity or build something together?

Because it’s not your job as a parent to entertain your children.

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#277

Post by alexashka »

hos234 wrote: post #241
Scoutmaster wrote: post #35

Earlier quoted context omitted.

What I've observed: they don't want any type of failure for their kids. I'm a Scoutmaster, and I have one parent who lashed out at me because I asked him not to interfere when the Scouts were trying to do something for themselves. I didn't let that affect me, I just thanked him for his feedback. Thankfully, I have the support of everyone else in the troop. What saddens me, is seeing first-hand how bad these parents a…

Newton's father died when he was 3 months old and his mother ditched him as a kid and when she returned years later made him quit school to take care of the pigs. The reason he went on to become the Isaac Newton everyone knows, was because of the role all the other Adults around him played, not his parents. Don't write off that kid. I teach part time and see this a lot. Especially from fellow teachers. Oh this kid ha…

Who are you referring to? I hope not public school teachers. They have 25-30 kids per class, little freedom to change curriculum and pressure from both administrators and parents to achieve high grades above all else.

You can preach personal sacrifice until the cows come home - capitalist societies are incompatible with having or raising children - they get in the way of the one true God, quarterly profits.

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#278

Post by oska »

neverartful wrote: post #113
RaceWon wrote: post #79

> I'm so glad I was able to grow up in the (sadly last) "be home for dinner, be back by dark" generation. Hey I'm old too. We played Lawn Jarts--the ones with the points on them. We rode in cars without seatbelts. We bike rode without helmets. Played tackle football without equipment on the frozen ground. We played Hardball at 6. And we Fought with each other. When I was 7 some older kid took my ball; my mom said "Yo…

Your first paragraph made me laugh. I'm that old too. We also regularly rode in the bed of pickup trucks, especially coming home from a baseball game. Playground equipment today is very different. No merry-go-round, see-saws, monkey bars, etc. Even the swing sets are not always there.

The playground equipment I see these days is simply awesome. Yes, improved safety, but also markedly more imaginative and fun-looking (climbing walls, flying foxes, monkey bars and other 'hang-from' stuff that's incorporated into interesting structures you can move around, still lots of swings). I don't see many see-saws but they were always pretty lame. I also don't see any merry-go-rounds but I didn't like them as a child anyway. I think kids have it so much better in terms of playground equipment these days, at least where I live. I do wonder that I don't see it getting more use though.

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#279

Post by fsloth »

aiyodev wrote: post #231
maire wrote: post #196

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I am not sure how old you are but everything seemed to change when abducted children were put on milk cartons in the mid 1980s. Before that, kids roamed free. I tell my foreign friends that kids used to run the streets in America and they can hardly believe it. The funny thing is that the danger of "stranger abductions" has been over blown. Most abductions are non-custodial parents.

Which countries still allow children to grow up free?

Finland. The environment is safe, and kids can roam free. We consider it as a fact that if a kid is above 7 they can manage by themselves a couple of hours without supervision. Including going to school, a visit to the near by store, a stroll in the park or woods and so on.

Re: We Have Ruined Childhood

#280

Post by kurthr »

aiyodev wrote: post #231
maire wrote: post #196

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I am not sure how old you are but everything seemed to change when abducted children were put on milk cartons in the mid 1980s. Before that, kids roamed free. I tell my foreign friends that kids used to run the streets in America and they can hardly believe it. The funny thing is that the danger of "stranger abductions" has been over blown. Most abductions are non-custodial parents.

Which countries still allow children to grow up free?

Also Japan... at least in Tokyo and I expect most other cities.
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