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Tell HN: Burnout is bad to your brain, take care

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Re: Tell HN: Burnout is bad to your brain, take care

#261

Post by okwhateverdude »

al_borland wrote: post #46
noobermin wrote: post #30

I've been burned out for two years after moving to a new country to work in one of the worst post-docs of my life. But, I've found I have no one to rely on but myself because employers don't care that you're burned out, they want to keep up their kpis. Sometimes you have to work even if you're already unhealthy. By the way, this isn't a "when the going gets tough" sort-of post, I'm just stating the reality of life.

My company sends out blasts to everyone that tells us to take care of our mental health and stuff like that, but it’s all a show. Our actually managers drive us into the ground and any sign of weakness are met with a kick while the person is down. Everyone I work with is burned out and miserable, but too scared to say anything about it or take the time they need. Hearing grown men break down and cry on calls isn’t fu…

> At this point, quitting seems like the only option.

Man, given this story, I think you have way more options. Like burning the place down, Milton-with-the-red-stapler style.

Jokes aside, GTFO that place, bro. Leave a harsh glassdoor review for the cathartic release (even if it won't get posted). The grass is definitely greener somewhere else even if it might be a gamble to find it.

Just note down everything you don't like about your current shithead employer and ask yourself, "what questions can I ask in an interview that will reveal these shithead employer tendencies?" Then go interview and remember that you are interviewing THEM. Don't worry about actually getting the job, interviews are a coin flip anyhow, just worry about how much shithead signal you're getting from them. If you end up jumping out of the frying pan and into the fire, just update your list of shithead employer questions and do it again. Life is way, way too short to deal with shitheads. Love yourself more than that.

Re: Tell HN: Burnout is bad to your brain, take care

#262

Post by ein0p »

astura wrote: post #230
ein0p wrote: post #177

Earlier quoted context omitted.

If you’re worried about the “gap”, don’t be. In my experience it doesn’t matter nearly as much as people believe. And don’t worry about your “career”. It’s basically all bullshit anyway.

This comment makes no sense. Your ability to provide for yourself and your family isn't "basically bullshit," and filing for short term disability doesn't leave a gap on your resume.

In the grand scheme of things arbitrary and artificial “career ladders” don’t matter. Your best strategy is to ignore all that and move around every 2-3 years looking solely at the dollar figures and ignoring the titles. If you do not move, you’re going to end up underpaid, even if you do get to a fancy title or “more responsibility”.

Re: Tell HN: Burnout is bad to your brain, take care

#263

Post by gosub100 »

gnulinux wrote: post #256
gosub100 wrote: post #246

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Its not "naive" to limit the scope or infer what the limited scope is, in this case it's tech workers. We aren't under contract to account for everyone else who is on a visa (that they chose to undertake) or works a low wage job. The comment is correct for an implied subset of the population.

"Mental health problems and life struggle doesn't matter unless you're privileged like me."

that's not what "privilege" means either.

Re: Tell HN: Burnout is bad to your brain, take care

#264

Post by ahaferburg »

crossroadsguy wrote: post #236
burningChrome wrote: post #38

Early on in my career (I was a late bloomer and already in early 30's) as a developer, I got burnt out pretty bad twice. After the second time and teetering on a third, I knew I had to do something to change what I was doing and how I managed my work load. I just focused on getting MY stuff done and that was it. I stopped taking on other's people work. I stopped taking on more work once I got my stuff done. I would d…

I have a slightly different aspect (as I was the complete opposite of that) of this from my life - but it's not a disagreement. So I have always had such a nice (some would say epic) work-life balance as far as "hours" and "availability" go. After a (forced) break from work, and exploring health related help professionally, I came to know I was clearly burnt out. I was told high number of "hours" working or "visible…

Your comment is very vague to the point of not containing any information. I would sum it up as "there are factors other than hours spent when it comes to burnout". What are those factors?

Re: Tell HN: Burnout is bad to your brain, take care

#265

Post by room4 »

nunez wrote: post #113
beaglesss wrote: post #111

Earlier quoted context omitted.

All hours spent with kids under 5 is basically 'on'. Which would leave most mothers I've met at zero 'on hours' left for work. A reason for the 'gender pay gap'?

[flagged]

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Re: Tell HN: Burnout is bad to your brain, take care

#266

Post by SoftTalker »

copperx wrote: post #118
SoftTalker wrote: post #104

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Yes, I’ve been in tech for 30+ years and just recently broke 6 figures in salary. But I live where a nice house is under $300K and I take satisfaction in living frugally.

That's interesting. What's your line of work?

Webdev in various stacks, database design, programming and administration, linux administration. Mostly in higher ed with a few forays into short-lived startups.

Re: Tell HN: Burnout is bad to your brain, take care

#267

Post by paulcole »

mrmetanoia wrote: post #241
burningChrome wrote: post #38

Early on in my career (I was a late bloomer and already in early 30's) as a developer, I got burnt out pretty bad twice. After the second time and teetering on a third, I knew I had to do something to change what I was doing and how I managed my work load. I just focused on getting MY stuff done and that was it. I stopped taking on other's people work. I stopped taking on more work once I got my stuff done. I would d…

You really do have to protect yourself. I think at some point I felt like if I set boundaries I'd get fired, then I realized if I didn't set boundaries I'd go insane which seemed worse than fired so I started telling people "no," and logging off on time. It's been an improvement. "Will the fight for our sanity, be the fight of our lives?" - flaming lips

> You really do have to protect yourself

I don’t know why this is a revelation to so many people.

Who cares about you more than you do? Nobody — especially not anybody at work.

Re: Tell HN: Burnout is bad to your brain, take care

#268

Post by shortrounddev2 »

burningChrome wrote: post #38

Early on in my career (I was a late bloomer and already in early 30's) as a developer, I got burnt out pretty bad twice. After the second time and teetering on a third, I knew I had to do something to change what I was doing and how I managed my work load. I just focused on getting MY stuff done and that was it. I stopped taking on other's people work. I stopped taking on more work once I got my stuff done. I would d…

> I stopped taking on more work once I got my stuff done. I would do exactly what a Sprint called for. Nothing more, nothing less. If I finished early with my tasks, I would stretch out the time and just tell the scrum master I was close, but not done yet, but always finished on time.

A PM at my company told me a few weeks ago "if you finish your work early, we can always find other things for you to work on" and I told him "you understand that my incentive is not to do that, right? If working faster only gives me more work to do, then why would I work faster?" He told me that fast workers are repaid with bonuses, promotions, etc., but I don't think most people believe in that kind of upward mobility anymore. I certainly don't

Re: Tell HN: Burnout is bad to your brain, take care

#270

Post by acdha »

badpun wrote: post #249
acdha wrote: post #238

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It wasn’t “our” culture unless you still live in the Bronze Age but I’d think of it more as a historical artifact which was preserved in part due to reinforcement based on that religious text. If Christianity did not give that text special significance you wouldn’t have millions of people saying they _must_ continue the practice.

Culture is a continuity that builds upon the past - in that sense it's our culture. Also, I've never ever heard anyone say that wives need to take names of their husbands, because the Bible says so. Is that an American thing?

> Culture is a continuity that builds upon the past - in that sense it's our culture

Cultures share history but the whole point is that they’re not continuous. You specified the pre-Christian era, and there have been many significant changes since then which any common definition of the term would consider discrete boundaries.

> Also, I've never ever heard anyone say that wives need to take names of their husbands, because the Bible says so. Is that an American thing?

It’s not specific to the US but there are certainly American churches which have strong opinions on this point. One thing to remember is that these things aren’t just the literal text of the scriptures in whatever version of the Bible they use but also the collection of interpretation and custom around it, and people have a history of interpreting scriptural text differently based on a position which they want to support.

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