> 1. Horizontal scaling. PG can do sharding or replication, but that's not the same thing. Manual resharding is something that, once you've experienced it, you don't want to do it ever again, especially when things like Spanner/Cockroach exist. Database-level liquid sharding is such a dramatically superior solution that it makes any system that depends on an enumerated set of master instances seem completely obsolete.
It feels like the industry has largely failed at this in regards to the traditional RDBMSes. Solutions like TiDB attempt to remedy this in a transparent way, but there are simply too many limitations for it to be a feasible alternative for many projects out there: https://docs.pingcap.com/tidb/stable/mysql-compatibility#uns...
I've only ever seen PostgreSQL/MySQL/MariaDB/Oracle be deployed successfully as single instances in prod that are scaled vertically, because attempts to do otherwise either create issues with performance and resiliency, or make the entire system only have eventual consistency, which is as problematic as it is inevitable when it comes to horizontally scaled and distributed systems.
I don't think that there is a good answer to this, honestly. You will get either horizontal scalability OR data consistency - pick one.
> 3. Interface abstraction. Databases that ship language-support drivers should also ship a fake in-memory implementation for testing purposes that supports the same interfaces and options. There's no reason why I should have to start a subprocess and emulate a network connection to tell whether a query functions properly or not, or whether I've set isolation properties correctly for a pipeline.
That's a good idea, but personally i've seen that almost all abstractions are leaky in one way or another. In the day of containers and highly customizable software that can scale from tens or hundreds of megabytes of memory with a fraction of a CPU core to an entire server with a hundred gigabytes of memory and dozens of CPU cores, it feels somewhat unnecessary to risk these abstractions.
Just make sure that your process for initializing the DB schema and seeding it with data for testing is fully automated and reproducible, and then spin up a disposable database container as a part of your CI process. Either that, or just don't test the actual DB implementation, which i've also seen be done to pretty horrendous results.
Edit: Perhaps my past experience makes me have certain biases - i've also seen manually set up DB instances which eventually leads to there being no good way to test N parallel feature branches, each of which needs a different schema, because that also necessitates N DB instances to be present, half or more of which could in theory break. I don't see any good options apart from containers here, especially when you need extensions which these in-memory implementations wouldn't play nicely with.