I am a successful software dev but I have a serious drinking problem • Hacker News Board

Re: I am a successful software dev but I have a serious drinking problem

#241

Post by unholygoat » Thu, Apr 10, 2014, 2:48 AM UTC

Fellow code-monkey, startup founder, alcoholic here -

It DOES get better. Shit I burned my entire life to the ground. Incredible salary (not to mention investments/savings), a house, fiancee, etc.. I had the whole fucking american dream and wasn't even 25. It felt though like the next thing I knew I was waking up and I was 29, having systematically destroyed everything in my life and was living off what little was left on my last non-maxed out credit card....eventually attempted suicide but my drunken ass failed at even that! I can't even begin to describe how un-comprehensibly demoralizing my life had become. In the absence of alcohol I'd shake uncontrollably which eventually led to auditory + visual hallucinations -- Some very scary shit! My neighbor took me to the ER one day after I stumbled down some stairs & promptly went into a full seizure in the waiting room....after a few days in their detox ward the simple logic of "What I had been doing wasn't working.....Maybe I should try a different approach," I found myself on a plane headed to a rehab out in Pasadena, CA where I remembered a few friends had been to (and were living the life I wanted). The entire experience from that moment on saved my life. That first year wasn't all peaches and cream but I quickly found my balance of life/work/family...got back all the relationships that mattered & the work/money eventually followed. I've seen the same shit happen to easily hundreds of others. Hell, I personally know a solid dozen VERY successful, well known posters/startup hero's on HN who are recovered alcoholics/addicts.

Please shoot me an email.. even just to chat... unholygoat@gmx.com (it's forwarded to my real email)

If you don't want to email me or Snail_commando at least checkout this site (It's a giant forum/directory of all the many different types of help out there & can put in in touch with all the various resources that are local to you).

http://www.soberrecovery.com/

Anyhow man, I hope to hear from you...there's an entire world out there of people who have lived through the madness and chaos and can help you do the same. -b

Re: I am a successful software dev but I have a serious drinking problem

#242

Post by unholygoat » Thu, Apr 10, 2014, 3:19 AM UTC

aestra wrote: post #145

Snail_Commando wrote: post #139

I don't know if you'll see this, but I hope you do. I've struggled with addiction and I've made decisions that I'm ashamed of and disgusted with. There was a period of my life when I was also hopeless. I thought that I had lost everything. In a sense, it was true. (Rather, I destroyed most of what I had and subsequently lost the remaining pieces.) Despite all of that, it does get better. It took me far too long to ac…

>Alcohol withdrawal can kill late stage addicts This is correct and very very important. Your brain is physically changed. Alcohol's primary effect is the increase in stimulation of the GABAA receptor, promoting central nervous system depression. With repeated heavy consumption of alcohol, these receptors are desensitized and reduced in number, resulting in tolerance and physical dependence. When alcohol consumption…

AA is NOT religious.

It says throughout their books + literature that the only reason it uses the word "god" sometimes is because it's an already well-known concept of what a 'higher power'.. or 'power/force greater than yourself' can be. That entire concept, and the basis for one of their steps, is essentially getting you to stop trying to control the things in your life that you have absolutely no control over (i.e. I can't control what your response will be so therefor I shouldn't worry about whether or not you understand what I'm trying to convey).

There ARE christian based recovery programs but unless you're already a very STRONG christian I'd stick to any number of organizations like AA or S.M.A.R.T recovery.

Btw there is no section on "what if I don't believe in God" in any AA literature... so i'm confused with why you're making shit up when this guy clearly needs real help & not just your speculation. AA worked for me, S.M.A.R.T recovery worked for a close friend, and I'm sure other programs out there have their success stories too.

Using wikipedia as a source for how someone should treat a medical condition (alcohol withdrawal) is not only misleading but in this case dangerous.

Think of addiction like LSD. For those who have experienced it there is no explanation necessary..for those who haven't there is no explanation possible (loosely paraphrased from "Be Here Now" by Ram Dass).

Re: I am a successful software dev but I have a serious drinking problem

#243

Post by ada1981 » Sat, Apr 12, 2014, 3:25 PM UTC

unholygoat wrote: post #241

Fellow code-monkey, startup founder, alcoholic here - It DOES get better. Shit I burned my entire life to the ground. Incredible salary (not to mention investments/savings), a house, fiancee, etc.. I had the whole fucking american dream and wasn't even 25. It felt though like the next thing I knew I was waking up and I was 29, having systematically destroyed everything in my life and was living off what little was le…

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I see this being best for someone who is going through a breakup, a transition, has a habit / addiction they'd like to overcome, has recently exited a company and is feeling unfulfilled / unsatisfied, or otherwise needs to reconnect to the aliveness of life.