Not being an asshole will make you more money • Hacker News Board

Re: Not being an asshole will make you more money

#241

Post by nmfisher » Sat, Mar 07, 2020, 3:49 AM UTC

inetknght wrote: post #188

airstrike wrote: post #158

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Being an American doesn't make it any less prejudiced. It's a gross generalization. Even assuming it were true, how is this an exclusive characteristic of America?

> Being an American doesn't make it any less prejudiced. Correct, but it does provide an insider's opinion. > It's a gross generalization. It is. > Even assuming it were true, how is this an exclusive characteristic of America? It isn't. I've noticed that Chinese companies are even worse.

> It isn't. I've noticed that Chinese companies are even worse.

Hit the nail on the head. Everything in this thread definitely happens in the USA, but you wouldn't say it's the default modus operandi.

In China, however, almost every company operates like this.

Re: Not being an asshole will make you more money

#242

Post by yellowapple » Sat, Mar 07, 2020, 4:04 AM UTC

smnrchrds wrote: post #236

jeremyvisser wrote: post #208

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Considering you're commenting in an international forum, what is "this country"?

It is supposed to be an international forum, but in practice it is a local group for San Francisco Bay Area. Consider how often articles about housing issues in Bay Area make it to the front page, compared to Vancouver, London, and Tokyo. HN is international in the sense that anyone can access and participate in it. But in practice, mostly SF Bay Area residents do.

For those downvoting this comment: this conclusion (that HN's reader base is predominantly based in the SF Bay Area) should be entirely unsurprising given that HN is itself the product of Y Combinator, an accelerator based in the SF Bay Area that (last I checked, and from what I recall back when I worked for a startup that applied) specifically requires its incubatees to relocate (if they're not already there) to the SF Bay Area during said incubation.

Yes, not all of us are in the SF Bay Area, but it's pretty reasonable to assume that most readers are.

Re: Not being an asshole will make you more money

#243

Post by RobertRoberts » Sat, Mar 07, 2020, 4:04 AM UTC

jacobush wrote: post #216

solaris00 wrote: post #204

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Why the indirectness? Is there a downside to directly confronting the lawyer?

You may never know. "Oh, my mistake. Sorry, I'll have the correct draft for you this afternoon."

Exactly this. I want to know and reveal motives (it's not foolproof) not just escape one incident.

They are likely to repeat the attempt if they think they can get away with it on you.

Re: Not being an asshole will make you more money

#244

Post by ibeckermayer » Sat, Mar 07, 2020, 4:05 AM UTC

koheripbal wrote: post #12

The major flaw in this article is that it does not defined what constitutes "asshole" behavior. There is a difference, for example, between being vindictive towards others, and simply pushing people out of their comfort zone. The term "asshole" is so vague that it borders on useless.

That is true in the way that PG uses it , but in this article its pretty clear what constitutes an "asshole" in business -- assholes are parasites. If you continually enter into deals that are exploitive of the other party, rather than mutually beneficial, you're an "asshole".

Re: Not being an asshole will make you more money

#245

Post by RobertRoberts » Sat, Mar 07, 2020, 4:06 AM UTC

lowdose wrote: post #172

RobertRoberts wrote: post #168

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> That so feels like a mistake... Easy to test. 1. Send back the document he sent with a copy of your most recent edits and ask him to confirm if his document is correct. 2. But, make note of at ONE error, and see if he fixes all of them. 3. If he only fixes only the one, then he's either really lazy or trying to keep up the deceit. 4. Repeat steps 1 to 3, be sure to CC everyone involved. If he's lazy he will be asha…

You must have had your share of weasels during contract negotiations.

I have dealt with some horrible people over the years. It's incredible what they will do to get away with stuff.

Standing your ground while maintaining a logical and rational approach is the only way to deal with them.

Most of them like a fight, so you simply can't pick one with them.

Re: Not being an asshole will make you more money

#246

Post by james_s_tayler » Sat, Mar 07, 2020, 4:15 AM UTC

smnrchrds wrote: post #236

jeremyvisser wrote: post #208

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Considering you're commenting in an international forum, what is "this country"?

It is supposed to be an international forum, but in practice it is a local group for San Francisco Bay Area. Consider how often articles about housing issues in Bay Area make it to the front page, compared to Vancouver, London, and Tokyo. HN is international in the sense that anyone can access and participate in it. But in practice, mostly SF Bay Area residents do.

I see participatants from all over the world here all the time. They usually qualify things with phrases like "where I'm from" or "in [insert country here].

It's only the Americans that think they're the center of the world.

I used to watch this Japanese show "Why did you come to Japan?" where a camera crew hangs out at Narita Airport and ambushes unsuspecting foreigners with that question and try to tag along on the journey of people they think are there for an interesting reason. When everyone introduces themselves they say the country they are from, except Americans who always say which state they are from and never the country. I found that particularly interesting. So, I just assume it's a deeply ingrained cultural thing to treat "America as default".

Re: Not being an asshole will make you more money

#247

Post by yellowapple » Sat, Mar 07, 2020, 4:47 AM UTC

jacquesm wrote: post #6

Most of the billionaires are assholes and/or criminals with a couple of noteworthy exceptions. So maybe not being an asshole will get you ahead in the middle but it won't get you all the way to the top of the foodchain. So this is solid advice, but unfortunately the role models are exactly those people that didn't follow this sort of advice. Microsoft, Amazon, Oracle, Apple, Google and Facebook all would not have bee…

> So maybe not being an asshole will get you ahead in the middle but it won't get you all the way to the top of the foodchain.

On the other hand, you're much more likely to get to the upper-middle than the top, so it's reasonable to optimize for that more-readily-achievable goal.

Re: Not being an asshole will make you more money

#248

Post by hermitdev » Sat, Mar 07, 2020, 5:19 AM UTC

thomk wrote: post #164

listsfrin wrote: post #131

Earlier quoted context omitted.

* if you have the money and the people prepared for 3)

Civil lawsuits come down to just one thing in this country: MONEY. Not the law, not what is right or who has been virtuous. Just money. Or more specifically: who has the money. If you are poor and you sue someone who is rich, they control that outcome. If you are rich and you sue someone who is poor, they (by default) control that outcome; there's nothing there. If you are both poor, a judge will often decide based w…

To clarify, I think this comes down to: can you afford your lawyer. Maybe you find a lawyer willing to work on contingency? Most of the time you won't (unless its a big case like a class-action - as far as I'm aware).

Re: Not being an asshole will make you more money

#249

Post by blackrock » Sat, Mar 07, 2020, 5:38 AM UTC

This is true..

Until you have a lot of money, and then you become an asshole.

Re: Not being an asshole will make you more money

#250

Post by daniel-cussen » Sat, Mar 07, 2020, 6:01 AM UTC

ta1234567890 wrote: post #157

xwdv wrote: post #137

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Why would he make it so personal? What did you guys do to him?

Great question. We are still trying to figure that out. We've consulted with multiple lawyers and therapists to try to fully understand the situation. Two guesses so far: 1) When he "offered" to take over the company, he said he would fire me and keep my cofounder running sales. This whole ordeal also coincidentally started a couple of days after my cofounder said she would be stepping down as CEO (even though he had…

> 1) When he "offered" to take over the company, he said he would fire me and keep my cofounder running sales. This whole ordeal also coincidentally started a couple of days after my cofounder said she would be stepping down as CEO (even though he had previously told her he would extend the note). We have the impression he wants to "own" my cofounder somehow (according to an expert in psychopaths that we consulted with, the investor fits the profile - my cofounder is also very pretty and she's had to deal with stalkers multiple times in the past)

This sounds like the basis. The saying goes, "Hell hath no fury as a woman scorned," but let's not be sexist, it applies to men as well. And no less to men who had no pretense of legitimate courtship.

You might get over the legal case by showing it's a vexatious lawsuit, for instance by showing that the monetary motivation is not rational because he turned down offers that would have remedied his loss completely.