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Retro-Tech Parenting

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Re: Retro-Tech Parenting

#221

Post by jon-wood »

petemill wrote: post #186
POBIX wrote: post #183

I think this is a misguided approach. Obviously children should not be let loose in this current digital world, but the restraints should be a very conservative blacklist, not a whitelist. For context I was born in 2005, so obviously much later than most people whose childhoods were enriched by technology, but all the same mine was. That is how I know succumbing to the Bad Side of the Internet is not inevitable. As a…

I'm currently in the "misguided" group as I parent 3 kids under 10 but I appreciate your viewpoint. I had similar experience and want my kids to learn that sense that they can accomplish anything by just learning how to do it from others on the internet. But still, everything today is offered on a platter. There's little resistance to overcome. No installing, no files, no configuration. I think that's what we accompl…

Why does there need to be the same learning and struggle that you went through? Making games has never been more accessible - you can fire up something like Scratch and have things moving almost instantly, then when you're ready for it make the jump to Godot or similar which is still accessible but also has enough power to build commercial games.

There isn't actually any inherent value to knowing how to get through an installer and edit a configuration file in vim. Those are just ancillary skills that people pick up alongside the actual thing they were looking to achieve (in my case it was building stupid websites in PHP). I'm pretty sure there are no end of things that you use without having been forced to learn the fundamentals first - if I take this to absurdity, can you take a pile of sand and turn it into a working CPU? If not, what right do you have to be sitting here using a computer?

Re: Retro-Tech Parenting

#222

Post by jon-wood »

bitwize wrote: post #42
scrappyjoe wrote: post #28

I set up a little neighbourhood pbx this year on an oracle cloud always free instance. Took a couple of days. Any family can buy a WiFi-enabled office phone and I’ll set up an extension for them. It’s working great! My six year old had a 15 minute chat with classmate while we were making dinner today; they have arranged a play date for next Monday. A couple of weeks ago a 5 year old invented prank calls. Every now an…

Well it beats asking for Amanda Hugankiss. That's really cool. Recently I had the fantasy of setting up a PBX here in the house and bringing back "dial up internet" for me and my wife, as a doomscrolling mitigation measure. Probably won't work though, as we each have smartphones plus she wants her streamers to play back full-fat 4K.

You could absolutely set up some traffic shaping on a router which drops social media sites down to 56kbps while allowing Netflix to use as much bandwidth as it needs to stream in 4K.

Re: Retro-Tech Parenting

#223

Post by kgwxd »

sejje wrote: post #111
AkshayGenius wrote: post #102

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This sounds very interesting and very much in-line with what I’ve been musing as a soon-to-be father. One question that comes to my mind is do your kids compare their experiences to their friends? If their friends have access to a laptop with internet, or a music subscription service with all the music constantly available (a la Spotify), do they not compare and ask you why their experiences must be so limited? Why d…

Just tell them the truth, friend. You want to protect them, this is your family's way.

> this is your family's way

Don't say that one. It's creep zone 9000. Respect will be lost. Better off just saying "because I say so."

Re: Retro-Tech Parenting

#225

Post by Litost »

LiteUser wrote: post #122
talking517 wrote: post #24

Earlier quoted context omitted.

these are great, thanks for sharing. ive found the tonibox for my youngest (3rd go round) really has helped deescalate tv watching and given us an alternative when they want to watch cartoons. one question for you; any plans on what you might do when the kids are 15, in highschool and all their friends have iphones?

A few ideas for you: 1. Talk openly and often about how much you hate your phone, how it's addictive, and all the dangers of social media. 2. Consider an Apple Watch with its own cellular plan. This allows them to TXT with friends, call you, and be located in Find Devices. 3. Create a sense of pride in not having a phone. Other parents will openly praise this. My child doesn't have, and doesn't want a phone. It's bee…

> Talk openly about how much you hate your phone...

The idea of modelling the behaviour you're trying to teach your kids seems to be a key one as mentioned in this interview with Zak Stein [1]. Obviously the general tone might be a bit too much anti-tech for this forum, but he certainly seems to have some well reasoned points to make and obviously the genie isn't going back in the bottle so working with tech whilst being aware of it's dangers as mentioned in the original article might be the best compromise for now?

[1] - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HpHuK4f7Mw4

Re: Retro-Tech Parenting

#226

Post by creaturemachine »

japhyr wrote: post #131
creaturemachine wrote: post #83

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Pick-ups and drop-offs? You walked yourself home, used your bike, or took the bus. This getting driven around is most ridiculous.

So many areas in the US are much less walkable and bikeable than they used to be. I say that as someone who bicycle commuted for years. When I rode my bike to school as a kid I dealt with 25-35 mph traffic. The traffic was much lighter, the vehicles were much smaller, the drivers weren't perfect but they were way less distracted, and the shoulders were in better shape. We can try to raise our kids with values that ar…

True, but the solution isn't to put another car on the road. Show that it's still possible, be the change and all that.

Re: Retro-Tech Parenting

#227

Post by dlord »

nkg wrote: post #35

I went the same route. I have bought stuff from the 2000s for my 10yo girl: pink plastic digital camera, mp3 player, a desktop PC in the middle of the living room. Btw, do you know any website where we can legally download mp3 ?

Bandcamp?

Re: Retro-Tech Parenting

#229

Post by picofarad »

jon-wood wrote: post #220
POBIX wrote: post #183

I think this is a misguided approach. Obviously children should not be let loose in this current digital world, but the restraints should be a very conservative blacklist, not a whitelist. For context I was born in 2005, so obviously much later than most people whose childhoods were enriched by technology, but all the same mine was. That is how I know succumbing to the Bad Side of the Internet is not inevitable. As a…

I'm glad I'm not the only person with this approach. We have a 12 year old son and we've never really gone overboard with restricting what he's permitted to do with his free time, if he wants to watch crap on YouTube then fine its his time. What we will do is talk to him about what he's doing, maybe sometimes ask why he's doing it ("hey, you appear to have watched the first 30 seconds of 5 videos in a row, have you c…

What you describe as how I raised my two oldest kids and how I'm raising my youngest who is now 10. The two older ones are productive members of society who have never done a mean thing to anyone in their life.

The only thing I did differently is I completely banned Disney and I didn't really have a TV in the house. A communal display that sometimes had tv shows on it, but my houses have not had televisions since mission accomplished in 2003.

I'm not saying my way is right, or your way is right, or everyone else's way is right or wrong. I'm just saying: me too, man.

Re: Retro-Tech Parenting

#230

Post by picofarad »

kefabean wrote: post #139
japhyr wrote: post #45

This is great, but it's also easy to go too far in this direction. This can work through elementary school and into middle school, but I don't think it works in high school. It's really hard to be a high school student without your own phone. I know some people who have kept their kids from having phones into high school. It avoids some of the addictive and distracting issues that come from having phones at a young a…

I purchased Mudita Kompakt phones for my kids when they started secondary school. There has been some pushback but overall it’s been a success. The fact that they occasionally forget to take it with them or they leave it downstairs when they go to bed, makes me comfortable that it doesn’t have addicting properties. And, because it’s android any apps demanded by school can easily be side loaded.

That costs more than the last seven phones I've bought. Not total, but each. I was expecting maybe $100, but $400? Is this a joke? A $400 dumbphone that isn't gold plated?
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