221–230 of 432 posts
Earlier quoted context omitted.
Or we could just make sure women have careers by having good social support?
Where does the social support come from if everyone is working?
Look at east vs west Germany. West Germany struggled with demand for social and child services during the pandemic, but the East never dismantled theirs, and it showed.
Care and support are jobs.
Earlier quoted context omitted.
Women can get pregnant and breast feed. Men can't. That is the primary reason women end up making more tradeoffs in terms of career vs. family. Sure, there are some cultural and political things that can be changed. But there are some fundamental biological realities that cannot. > Right - so imagine that you didn't have that opportunity to do that academic work because you have an elderly parent at home who needs ca…
>Women can get pregnant and breast feed. Men can't. So that's 9 months + some amount of months breast feeding. What's the excuse after that? Couples of all types need to find the balance that is right for them, but the comments in this thread trying to use biology as an excuse to make 18 years (or life, as I see it) worth of child-rearing strictly a "women's issue" are living in the past. >Many people will choose the…
The possibilities are endless to make having a child easier for both mothers and fathers and people are stuck on "women have to breastfeed so they have to sacrifice their careers".
Why not something like a GI-bills structure to reward having children? Blows my damn mind people think sacrifice is a necessary part of having a child from society's point of view.
It's election season and I've been out talking to voters, who share their life stories... what I would say is that there are many women who are choosing WFH because they either can't afford or can't find day care, which may lead to deciding that hey, they might as well have another baby if they are now committed to this employment model. I've spoken to several women who were over-qualified for the jobs they had taken…
> overlooking the way women have stepped up for their families often to the detriment of their own careers. My favorite question to ask is: "why you want a career?" to pretty much anyone who speaks in this manner. Serious question to people, I don't get it. I love learning, I'm highly qualified in the academic space and enjoy picking at problems. I've written papers, patents, well paid, etc. Highly successful by most…
Earlier quoted context omitted.
Women can get pregnant and breast feed. Men can't. That is the primary reason women end up making more tradeoffs in terms of career vs. family. Sure, there are some cultural and political things that can be changed. But there are some fundamental biological realities that cannot. > Right - so imagine that you didn't have that opportunity to do that academic work because you have an elderly parent at home who needs ca…
>Women can get pregnant and breast feed. Men can't. So that's 9 months + some amount of months breast feeding. What's the excuse after that? Couples of all types need to find the balance that is right for them, but the comments in this thread trying to use biology as an excuse to make 18 years (or life, as I see it) worth of child-rearing strictly a "women's issue" are living in the past. >Many people will choose the…
Times how ever many children they decide to have. Generally during prime years of career development. That is not a trivial commitment.
> but the comments in this thread trying to use biology as an excuse to make 18 years (or life, as I see it) worth of child-rearing strictly a "women's issue" are living in the past.
Yes, that is why I did not make that claim.
> Meanwhile, the people in my area have shitty low paying jobs and can't afford housing, and are still trying to support their kids and elderly parents, all while having eff-all in the way of access to quality, affordable health care.
Yes, that's the part about money being a means to an end. Being able to commit one parent to child raising is a privilege requiring having basic economic needs met on one income. That used to be the reality in the US, but no longer.
Earlier quoted context omitted.
If you're breastfeeding, it's gotta be the woman. And ideally, you are breastfeeding. Beyond that, most women strongly want to be with their babies. There was a NYT article a few years back about the boom of internet baby monitors, and it was kind of heartbreaking -- a bunch of women sitting at their desks glued to their baby monitors wishing they could be with their babies. I think we've really fucked up as a societ…
Not only that. We are all ready to go to war to protect the right to abort a pregnancy. But where is the passion wrt rights for mothers to not have to feel like they are abandoning their children after shortly after birthing them because they ran out of (or never had) parental leave? Our priorities as a society have been inverted in this area.
Earlier quoted context omitted.
If you're breastfeeding, it's gotta be the woman. And ideally, you are breastfeeding. Beyond that, most women strongly want to be with their babies. There was a NYT article a few years back about the boom of internet baby monitors, and it was kind of heartbreaking -- a bunch of women sitting at their desks glued to their baby monitors wishing they could be with their babies. I think we've really fucked up as a societ…
Pumping and storing breast milk is extremely common. You can absolutely give your child breast milk and work, and I know many professionals who do.
Of course none of this stuff is critical, but I think for most people, the ideal scenario really is breastfeeding, straight from the breast -- and it's a shame that's so hard for so many to do in our society.
Earlier quoted context omitted.
If you're breastfeeding, it's gotta be the woman. And ideally, you are breastfeeding. Beyond that, most women strongly want to be with their babies. There was a NYT article a few years back about the boom of internet baby monitors, and it was kind of heartbreaking -- a bunch of women sitting at their desks glued to their baby monitors wishing they could be with their babies. I think we've really fucked up as a societ…
Pumping and storing breast milk is extremely common. You can absolutely give your child breast milk and work, and I know many professionals who do.
Just handwaving "but pumps!" really undermines how much effort this takes for women.
Earlier quoted context omitted.
It's been amazing to me that developed countries have bemoaned birth rates... and then done nothing effective about it. You know what says "This country values parents who choose to have children?" Actual replacement of lost income potential and career progression. Yes, in the US there are tax credits, SNAP, etc. None of these even come close to replacing the life income changes. If we were serious about it, we'd hav…
> It's been amazing to me that developed countries have bemoaned birth rates... and then done nothing effective about it. I always thought a low birth rate was a net-good: Something all countries are striving for. Like when your country drops below 2 births per woman, it has "made it" into the ranks of Developed Countries. Lower birth rate means fewer bodies to feed and a smaller environmental footprint. Sure, I gues…
Earlier quoted context omitted.
> Raising children should be regarded as one of the most important things a woman can do because they’re the only ones that can do it. This seems pretty reductionist to me. Men can absolutely raise children. Husbands in heterosexual couples should absolutely be raising their children and not leaving the entire task of raising them to their wives. Gay men can also raise children. I don't think you meant to be disrespe…
If you're breastfeeding, it's gotta be the woman. And ideally, you are breastfeeding. Beyond that, most women strongly want to be with their babies. There was a NYT article a few years back about the boom of internet baby monitors, and it was kind of heartbreaking -- a bunch of women sitting at their desks glued to their baby monitors wishing they could be with their babies. I think we've really fucked up as a societ…
I then went on to quit work and stayed home to raise our daughter (she's now nearing 28 year old).
I'm a strong believer in having a stay-at-home parent, but this "women raise children" thing needs to stop.
Earlier quoted context omitted.
Yes, but my point was that the set of 25 year old couples who ended up working from home and having sex more often because of it probably will not end up with a baby because they will not have forgone birth control. Or a couple who has already had their desired amount of kids would not end up with more kids even though they are having more sex due to them using birth control. Whereas a 30 to 35 year old couple who wa…
Every birth control method has a failure rate, even for perfect use, never mind for average use. If all else stays the same but the amount of sex goes up, the number of babies will also go up. Are the 25yo couples who are having more sex making other changes to decrease likelihood of pregnancy? Realistically? Probably not. They probably use their birth control the same way they always have, since it previously worked…
https://americanpregnancy.org/unplanned-pregnancy/birth-cont...
Even the pill is listed at 9%, which is low, and of course, abortion is the last resort to completely prevent a birth.
For couples who are finished having children, a vasectomy also basically has a 0% failure rate.