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I just don’t want to be busy anymore

elenasalaks.medium.com

221–230 of 463 posts

Re: I just don’t want to be busy anymore

#221

One thing that helped me is not to care so much about my employer's goals. It's almost heretical. But once you embrace this mindset, it does wonders. Or at least, it has for me so far. I think a lot of us want to be proud of the work we do, and we feel that if we slack off, then we shouldn't be proud. But it's the other way around. I think the slackers have it right. You're probably not going to get rich from working…

Correct me if I'm wrong, but it sounds like the premise here is that the only purpose for a career is to "get rich". I think a lot of people genuinely enjoy the work they do, and the relationships they have with their co-workers. Or, on the darker side of things, over-work themselves because they can't find anything engaging _outside of work_. For both of those groups of people, they might not actually enjoy getting…

The topic of the article is burn out, and if you are burnt out obviously you are no longer enjoying the work you do.

Re: I just don’t want to be busy anymore

#222
All good advice. I distinctly remember they day I changed. I was talking to my wife and telling her how I thought Sun should give more vacation, she pointed out that I had come back from the office at lunch time and that is was Christmas Eve which was a company holiday. So many things went "Click!" all at the same time.

From that point on I made it a priority to be home by 6PM so that we could have dinner with the family at 6:30. No more late nights, no more stressing about being the first guy to leave the office. Instead I was going to have a relationship with my kids and share in the adventures of their childhood.

It did affect my career, nobody who wanted to get to VP level ever went home on time AFAICT. But it gave me focus in that I knew I was going to roll out of the office between 5:30 and 5:45 so my deadlines were set accordingly. I did log in some evenings after the kids had gone to bed but it wasn't the "usual" thing. And the wife and I spread out the vacation so that every month we had a 3 day weekend (either from holidays or by using a vacation day.) It made things much more tolerable.

Re: I just don’t want to be busy anymore

#223

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Does the AMA certify the colleges of nurses? No. And yet here we are: https://www.theguardian.com/society/2019/feb/12/nurses-hospi...

I didn't say doctors were responsible for all understaffed roles in the country. But they are partly responsible for understaffed physician roles. :) The payer aspect I mentioned is relevant for the nurses.

In America we pay on average ~$3000 per day of stay in the hospital. How much extra do we have to pay to have enough nurses so that we don't work them to death?

Why British hospitals have a fraction of that cost (1/10th)? Oh yes, it is because they decided that it is not a moneymaking business.

Overworked employees should not blame themselves for not being able to keep up with unreasonable hours. They should blame the real responsible for their misery. Their employer.

Re: I just don’t want to be busy anymore

#224
Can confirm. Left my job in the software industry with no plans to return. Everyone asks how my break is going and I say “fine”, but I’m retired at 40.

The idea of being back at work in some 9-5 or 8-6 where my brain is still trying to solve the problems of the day as I lie in bed are over. Certainly a lot of parents can sympathize with the itch of “if I can get the kids to sleep I can get a few more hours in”. No more of that. I can finally be present. I’m done competing with smart people who have no kids, and an industry that expects workaholics.

Re: I just don’t want to be busy anymore

#225
post #20

One of the things which quickly overwhelms me is just all the little stuff. Couple big ticket items? No problem. Long list of 5-20 minute items, or even worse, conversations of indefinite length? Exhausting.

I work for a big company (F500), and one thing that always bothers me is the out of nowhere Slack messages that are three paragraphs long, by someone I have never met within the company. If I start helping them right away, they are happy to keep me online for the next hour while my flow is gone, god knows where. I am trying to find the nicest way to say: "This should be an e-mail conversation, please send email.", bu…

> "This should be an e-mail conversation, please send email."

Or the classic "Open a ticket."

Re: I just don’t want to be busy anymore

#226
post #99

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Depends on how you classify "productive" in a 40-50hr work week I would say 50-60% is productive actual work (i.e writing a program, or doing the actual task you are paid to do), 10-15% is administrative (making task list, organizing your work, reporting about your work, etc) 10-15% is meetings about your work, 10-15% is socialization with co-workers, unofficial breaks, informal meetings, etc. So if you do not count…

I don't know really. Several years ago, I got to visit Groupon HQ in Chicago (yes, really! :). I'm an 2nd generation computer person - I started using them in very late 70s and working professionally with them in the middle of the 80s, and even though I was a part of the .com boom, I've been away from that sort of world for decades. Wandering around that place for several hours my main though was "wow, how does anyon…

I once visited the opening of a new library, and found myself getting outraged when I looked around at the desks and sitting areas and places where one was supposed to be able to sit down and read a book ---- they were all totally exposed to visibility by everyone else in the entire room in such a way that I knew I could never be comfortable reading a book in this library. And that made me very angry. Yet the fault is somehow mine, as this FISHBOWL architecture is cool and all the rage. Guess I have to take the book home if I want to read it without being WATCHED.

Re: I just don’t want to be busy anymore

#227
post #11

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Part of the problem is that I'm a Software Engineer as well as a Business Analyst and Project Manager. I'm also managing a dev team, so it's really difficult to only work 6 hours a day. Hell, I can't even do all my work in a 40 hour work week. Yes, I realize this isn't a me issue and I'm looking for other work. The problem is that I'm encountering a lot of ageism in this field too.

I’m afraid of ageism too, and I’m 39. I’m lucky to work for a company that looked beyond this and saw my skills as a self-taught programmer, and took me on with a freelance contract. My main concern is continuing to find work whenever this current job ends. It’s a good field, and I enjoy it because it’s helpful to society ( nursing related software ) but I know I’m not the greatest programmer out there. My current gi…

Early 40’s and I feel very lucky to have a job. I feel certain that once I hit 50 I’ll be unable to get hired. I think the trick is to make sure the job you have by 45 is somewhere that will be willing to keep you as you age.

Re: I just don’t want to be busy anymore

#228

One thing that helped me is not to care so much about my employer's goals. It's almost heretical. But once you embrace this mindset, it does wonders. Or at least, it has for me so far. I think a lot of us want to be proud of the work we do, and we feel that if we slack off, then we shouldn't be proud. But it's the other way around. I think the slackers have it right. You're probably not going to get rich from working…

This attitude works at random jobs where you’re replaceable, absolutely. However if you’re a meaningful part of an early team with equity, this is quite literally how you can indeed get rich.

The problem is that most people are NOT a meaningful part of an early team. The Silicon Valley Dream is to find a unicorn startup and be one of the first 5 engineers. In pursuit of that dream some people work way too much at jobs where they are NOT going to get rich from it. Stock options almost always end up being worth nothing. I think the OP has a point, which is, unless you're really sure you stand to get rich from that job, don't put your mental health on the line for it. Sound advice.

Re: I just don’t want to be busy anymore

#229

I think it’s pretty clear we have an epidemic of burnout on our hands. I think it’s a new phenomenon. And I think immersive online experiences are the underlying cause. I’ve lived much of my life for the past 30 years in virtual spaces of one form or another, from MUDs to IRC to MMORPGs to early and then fully evolved social media. As commercial virtual space showed up, I noticed the engagement hooks and potential fo…

> I think it’s pretty clear we have an epidemic of burnout on our hands. I think it’s a new phenomenon.

During the 1880s, children under 12 were working 16 hours a week in UK factories. So probably not as new as you'd think :)

Re: I just don’t want to be busy anymore

#230

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This attitude works at random jobs where you’re replaceable, absolutely. However if you’re a meaningful part of an early team with equity, this is quite literally how you can indeed get rich.

The problem is that most people are NOT a meaningful part of an early team. The Silicon Valley Dream is to find a unicorn startup and be one of the first 5 engineers. In pursuit of that dream some people work way too much at jobs where they are NOT going to get rich from it. Stock options almost always end up being worth nothing. I think the OP has a point, which is, unless you're really sure you stand to get rich fr…

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