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The psychology behind ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’

bbc.com

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Re: The psychology behind ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’

#221

Post by Impossible »

godot wrote: post #161
_9omd wrote: post #92

Everyone is talking about shifting time around by doing things like getting up earlier, but that doesn't get around a fundamental problem of not enjoying the working part of your day. You still have the same amount of time, just shifted to a different end, and maybe you're a bit better off that way, but it's still the minority of the day. The real solution is to figure out how to love a larger percentage of your day.…

The thing is for many other people it's not about enjoying work or not. I enjoy my job a lot, it's the best one I've had in the past decade. I also have a toddler. After I finish work promptly at 5 (sometimes before, and I work from home), it's a non-stop series of "work" bathing for the kid, either playing with the kid (while my spouse cooks) or I cook (and she plays with the kid, so either way it's busy work for bo…

My spouse does this for the exact same reason (we have a 3 year old). I feel like a bag of shit when I don't sleep so I just don't have personal free time.

Re: The psychology behind ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’

#222

Post by Broken_Hippo »

FalconSensei wrote: post #166
08-15 wrote: post #151

Earlier quoted context omitted.

However, that's an eight hour shift, not twelve as mentioned in the article. Eight hours of work, eight hours of sleep, and two hours of commuting and personal hygiene still leaves a full six hours per day to use however she likes. That doesn't sound too bad.

Then you add cooking, laundry, dishes, cleaning the house, taking care of kids if they have...

And not to mention that some factory work is fairly draining, and you might not have energy to do anything you'd like to do.

Re: The psychology behind ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’

#223

Post by tyre »

godot wrote: post #208
tyre wrote: post #172

Earlier quoted context omitted.

When I read things like this, it makes me not want to have children. From friends, it doesn’t sound like your experience is much different. I’m sure you’re biased and it’s culturally unacceptable (to say the least) to say that you’d rather not have had kids, but I wonder how often you think about that loss of individuality? Maybe it’s that what you’d do were you to have the time wouldn’t be as “productive” in a broad…

I think those are great questions to ask actually, my only real answer here is that, one should be very aware of the fact that this current stage is temporary (both for my sanity, as well as for a perspective of cherishing it). As others have said and you already know, the first couple of years of a kid is the toughest for parents. It gets better from there and I know I'll get more free time back pretty much as soon…

This is very helpful, thank you! I guess in my mind there wasn't that gradient as they get older.

Re: The psychology behind ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’

#224

Post by cbozeman »

sandworm101 wrote: post #175
08-15 wrote: post #151

Earlier quoted context omitted.

However, that's an eight hour shift, not twelve as mentioned in the article. Eight hours of work, eight hours of sleep, and two hours of commuting and personal hygiene still leaves a full six hours per day to use however she likes. That doesn't sound too bad.

>> Eight hours of work No. It is eight hours on shift , on the factory line. That doesn't include all the pre/post work getting to/from the line, paperwork to do and meetings to attend. All of that is probably another hour or two every day. >> two hours of commuting and personal hygiene We don't all live next to the factory. I'd say two hours just for commuting. As for personal hygiene, I leave it to the ladies here…

I spoke with her recently, and she seems like she's at the breaking point because the company is requiring her to work 7 days a week. About a month ago, they instituted a new policy:

You can't say no to overtime if you're asked, or you'll incur a write-up. Three write-ups and you're terminated.

And because of Texas labor laws, an hours over 60 are not paid at double time as they are in many other states. Meaning by the time Saturday rolls around, were she in California, she'd at least be making double time at some point. Instead, they only get double time on a Sunday.

She told me last week, she had 82 hours. For a job that pays $16 an hour. Yes, she's probably clearing $4000 a month, but she's putting in CEO-level hours to do so. The saddest part about all this is that many people are jumping for the chance at these positions because of the insane amount of overtime this company is offering.

The United States should be better than this.

Re: The psychology behind ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’

#225

Post by balfirevic »

PragmaticPulp wrote: post #203
smallnamespace wrote: post #186

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Chances are good that the majority of parents in your community, office, or social circle are actually very happy most of the time. There's just not much to talk about because being happy with your family is the boring, normal state. Slightly off-topic, but this isn't limited to parenting feedback, it's true of nearly any topic online. Some forums are full of people venting, some forums are full of people showing o…

Very true. Even worse, there's a significant selection bias that occurs where people pre-filter for opinions that match their pre-conceived notions. On the topic of children, someone can spend their entire life around coworkers, extended family, and friends who are happy parents without thinking twice about it. Yet as soon as they read some comments online about someone struggling with their children, they have an "I…

> I do, however, roll my eyes at how out of touch the anti-child rhetoric on the internet has become.

I guess it depends where you look, but here on HN comments seem to lean towards being pro-children - which makes sense, since most people want them and have them.

The most interesting kind of comments, to me, are the ones that try to convey how having kids is great and worth it, and yet - upon reading them - all I can think of is "wow, that sounds horrible". There is one example that is kind of like that in this thread [0].

I know it's because it's much easier to convey in words how annoying or boring something is compared to how it brings this deep, unspeakable (and perhaps, for some readers, yet unexperienced) joy. It's still a bit funny.

[0] - https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=25271156

Re: The psychology behind ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’

#226

Post by sandworm101 »

navbaker wrote: post #213
sandworm101 wrote: post #149

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It isn't just the fortune 5000. I'm in the military, an organization where fitness is literally in my job description. I should be able to step away from my desk for a few minutes to exercise, but 10/20/30 minutes can be a long time when the boss needs something asap. And it is always asap. Ironically, even though I am on a base the majority of my work occurs over phone/email connections to people other locations. Co…

Once you hit the staff/command level the stress of the job combined with the lack of time to exercise due to everything being an absolute emergency really takes a toll on your health. I was never the type to hate being in the military, but stepping away was the best decision I’ve ever made in terms of physical and mental well being.

From your phraseology, I take it you were in the US military. I'm in a different military with a very different culture. We have Americans working with/for us. They are very happy. They never want to go home, always trying to extent their time. Right now, at the height of covid worries, there is no job I would rather have atm.

Re: The psychology behind ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’

#227

Post by [deleted] »

bradlys wrote: post #106
malux85 wrote: post #95

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> The real solution is to figure out how to love a larger percentage of your day. A lot of this has to do with cultivating the right attitude and not getting exploited by others. At work, don't allow your employer to work you to the bone; work at a steady and enjoyable pace, take lots of breaks to socialize with colleagues, get coffee, go for walks, eat a long lunch in the park, etc. ^ This people, THIS. Programmers…

Don’t overexaggerate the facts. Programmers are /not/ in massive demand. Even skilled ones. It’s why there’s essentially no compensation growth for the last few years outside of FAANG. All growth has been through stock. The sheer massive number of people entering the field and how hard it is to get a job as an engineer should make this more obvious. If massive demand were true, we wouldn’t have ever increasingly diff…

[deleted]

Re: The psychology behind ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’

#228

Post by lathiat »

godot wrote: post #161
_9omd wrote: post #92

Everyone is talking about shifting time around by doing things like getting up earlier, but that doesn't get around a fundamental problem of not enjoying the working part of your day. You still have the same amount of time, just shifted to a different end, and maybe you're a bit better off that way, but it's still the minority of the day. The real solution is to figure out how to love a larger percentage of your day.…

The thing is for many other people it's not about enjoying work or not. I enjoy my job a lot, it's the best one I've had in the past decade. I also have a toddler. After I finish work promptly at 5 (sometimes before, and I work from home), it's a non-stop series of "work" bathing for the kid, either playing with the kid (while my spouse cooks) or I cook (and she plays with the kid, so either way it's busy work for bo…

lol this resonated so hard with me - and I work from home and always have even pre-COVID so no commute. I have a 2.4 year old.

It has been getting a bit nicer of recent in that she's talking so much now that I'm really enjoying having conversations and doing things with her in a way that has only really just started last month or two. But she's also "misbehaving" / not listening a lot more so it has it's ups and downs :)

Re: The psychology behind ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’

#229

Post by bigbonch »

toxik wrote: post #216
InitialLastName wrote: post #177

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Disclaimer: I don't have kids, but I have done my share of childcare I suspect that this is one of the places we've lost out by splitting off to nuclear families with a small number of closely spaced children. Childcare is a job that, while difficult and stressful at times, is not particularly intellectually challenging, nor does it require very much expertise or physical strength. It's also relatively parallelizeabl…

While this sounds nice and good, the removal of generational living was completely intentional. Why? Because of the one thing you left out: it is the women who disproportionately end up taking care of the home and the children. There is no real feminism with this traditional system in place. Even with the modern setup, women take care of children more _even if they don't want to_, simply because nursing takes a lot o…

I don't have much of an opinion on generational living, but could you elaborate on how it guarantees women disproportionately end up with kin work? Also I find it interesting that the institution of motherhood is completely removed from the modern day narrative of empowerment. As long as it is fairly left up to the woman to choose, why would choosing motherhood not be empowering?

Re: The psychology behind ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’

#230

Post by balfirevic »

jjoonathan wrote: post #60
sjg007 wrote: post #8

Here’s how you fix this. Go to bed early and wake up earlier. I do honestly believe that young adults naturally stay up later though. I think there’s an evolutionary reason for it, basically to keep the nights watch and ward off predators.

I'm a night owl (sleep 12-8am) who occasionally experiences season-long hard constraints that force me into early bird schedules (sleep 8-4am). Whenever the temperatures get high and I don't have access to an air-conditioned gym, I have to get up for the daily temperature minimum, whatever it takes. Since this happens for an entire summer, it gives me the chance to adapt to the schedule and optimize around it. The ea…

> I'm a night owl (sleep 12-8am)

That's... a night owl now?

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