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I decided that I must live my life on my terms

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211–220 of 223 posts

Re: I decided that I must live my life on my terms

#211

How old are you OP? Just because I'd like to compare myself with you ;). I really struggle with this and have yet to have the "click". I feel maybe I've been doing a bit better as I've gotten older (32 now), but still nowhere close where I want to be - both in terms of mentally letting go and objectively where I want to end up. The problem I really struggle with is the dichotomy of the two in my head. One part of me…

Have been pondering a lot about this. There is no answer. Only the answer to yourself and your preferences but the question is: "Do you want success?" or "It is expected of you to be successful".

Google "Cosmic theory of insignificance" by Oliver Burkeman and listen to 20m it will explain the concept that all your success is basically meaningless and its a good thing.

Re: I decided that I must live my life on my terms

#212

> I've spent my whole life trying to find my purpose I've always been puzzled at how so many people expect to find "purpose". Nobody has "purpose". You weren't placed on Earth for a reason. You only exist due to the luck of your parents getting laid. And quite frankly, 99.9% of the population will be unremarkable, even if you restrict that 99.9% to first-world countries. I don't expect to have an impact on the world…

Just to add a small positive spin to your comment: We all make an impact every day. But for the vast majority of us it will be small ripples instead of a giant splash. But the ripples are real and affect the world. They echo far into the future. So try to do good when you can :) It does matter! Even if it is hard to see how sometimes.

“The growing good of the world is partly dependent on unhistoric acts; and that things are not so ill with you and me as they might have been, is half owing to the number who lived faithfully a hidden life, and rest in unvisited tombs.”

– Mary Ann Evans, aka, George Eliot

Re: I decided that I must live my life on my terms

#213

> Basically, I want to grow old doing what I love, not feeling that I am working. That’s where I’m at, now. I was forced into that, but, after a few years, I’ll admit it’s the best thing that ever happened to me. I’m not rich; and likely never will be, but I’m going to be fine. I was considering working for another ten years, and adding more to a pile, but it would have cost me my soul. This was made quite clear to m…

>of almost 27 years It shouldn't but I'm willing to be that worked against you as well.

Yup.

In most industries, that kind of consistency is a plus (especially if you consider where all that time was spent).

Ageism is every bit as illegal, self-destructive, and uncouth as racism, ableism, or sexism; but is actively —proudly, even— encouraged in tech.

I understand where a lot of it comes from, but it’s really no different from “All our girls start off in the typing pool.”

As I mentioned, I’m quite capable of making other people a great deal of money, but it’s more important for them to treat me in a shabby manner, than to create great product.

Here’s an example.

I’m working on a fairly ambitious (40 screens) app. It’s getting ready for our phase one testing. I’ve been working on the frontend app (native Swift UIKit app) for about a year and a half (I also wrote the backend. That took seven months, a few years ago, and I also wrote another backend that we use as a data source, about ten years ago, that is now a worldwide infrastructure, but backend is not really my forte). This time has been mostly spent refining the app. I actually had a “shippable” app, after a month of coding, but we needed to make sure that it would be suitable for our end-users, so all that time has been spent working on over 600 TestFlight releases. At one point in the project, we probably had over 60 screens. I really like removing large swaths of code.

I’m also working for free. If no one wants to pay me to code, I’ll do it anyway.

Yesterday, I was bored. I’m at that part of the project, where I make a release, then wait for the team to decide the next step. The steps are small, at this point, and the team spends a lot of time arguing about things like colors.

So I wrote another app.

In an afternoon.

It’s already ship-ready, but I’ll spend a couple of days, polishing it up. It is a fully-native Swift UIKit app (not some ghastly hybrid), is small and lightweight, already completely localizable, adapts to dark mode, works on iPad, and has a high degree of polish. I shared it last night with the team on TestFlight. Some haven’t even had a chance to install it, yet, and it hasn’t completed the first Apple vetting.

It’s a fairly humble (4 screens) app, but it will be fun for our users, and will be a great “brand reinforcement” tool. Down the road, we’ll probably integrate it into a suite with the main app; but that’s icing on the cake.

The code Quality is out of this world, and it is done in a fashion that documentation comes from running a bash script, called “jazzy.command”. That creates a “docs” directory that can be uploaded to a GitHub Pages site.

The team will spend more time coming up with copy for the App Store, than I spent, writing the app.

That’s the kind of thing that experience gets you. It’s quite obvious that I’m capable of this kind of thing. A quick shufti at my portfolio makes it clear. I’ve met many folks that are more capable than I am.

It’s just that people are so fixated on my gray hair, that they, literally, refuse to look at my portfolio.

Re: I decided that I must live my life on my terms

#214
post #200

> Basically, I want to grow old doing what I love, not feeling that I am working. That’s where I’m at, now. I was forced into that, but, after a few years, I’ll admit it’s the best thing that ever happened to me. I’m not rich; and likely never will be, but I’m going to be fine. I was considering working for another ten years, and adding more to a pile, but it would have cost me my soul. This was made quite clear to m…

sorry to hear that, i hope if you feel like working a job again, you find kind, compassionate coworkers. Our experience of interviewing & working is a function of the people we interact with and there are both "good" and "bad" people. I have experienced both during my career and i hope, i ( & everyone else) gets to experience more of the "good" ones !

Agreed. During the time I mentioned, I worked for one of the top imaging science corporations in the world. My peers were some of the finest scientists and engineers in the industry. I regularly worked with people that are household names.

Not all of them were “sunshine and joy.” They could be very demanding, and intolerant of deviations from their ideals, but it was an exhilarating ride, that few people get to experience. It was a signal Honor to work there.

Re: I decided that I must live my life on my terms

#215

> I've spent my whole life trying to find my purpose I've always been puzzled at how so many people expect to find "purpose". Nobody has "purpose". You weren't placed on Earth for a reason. You only exist due to the luck of your parents getting laid. And quite frankly, 99.9% of the population will be unremarkable, even if you restrict that 99.9% to first-world countries. I don't expect to have an impact on the world…

You can "make the world a better place" simply by not lying to yourself or others: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_road_to_hell_is_paved_wi...

Re: I decided that I must live my life on my terms

#216

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That’s the cynic’s own delusion: that they are the realist and the world is full of pie in the sky idealists. It’s like the precocious 12 yr old that never matures.

>That’s the cynic’s own delusion: that they are the realist and the world is full of pie in the sky idealists. It’s like the precocious 12 yr old that never matures. And that's the optimists delusion: that the cynic isn't a realist.

Which is both of their delusions, because it is likely they are both wrong, but some portion of their belief was correct.

Re: I decided that I must live my life on my terms

#217
post #187

Earlier quoted context omitted.

In this very thread there are people spouting pop-philosophical aphorisms who spend their working days building out machine learning algorithms to help target people in ads better. It's more than toxic, it's ailing. It's not just HN, it's the general inability of people to perceive themselves. These things are taught in the humanities, a field of study that's pretty poo-pooed in the tech world as nonsense. It's no su…

That ML and those targeted ads may help identify a depressed teenager and help them get help. A lot of folks who are depressed, especially kids, do not know that they are. And many adults in their lives do not see it either.

Lol. I'm sorry, but that is not what is happening here. All one has to do is look around their world the past decade.

But credit where credit is due—that's a new one. "Targeted ads are for saving lives"

Come on, man.

edit: For the record, I've been down that road. Drowning in cynical consumerism is not only not the answer, it's actively harmful to be awash in that much vampiric information. If you found help because of a chance encounter with an ad, I'm happy for you. The universe is a crazy place and good can most certainly come from bad (and the other way around). But my god man, those are not designed to help people—they are designed to extract maximum revenue at any cost—social, personal, or otherwise.

Re: I decided that I must live my life on my terms

#218
post #45

As long as you are obeying the law, then do whatever you think is necessary. No one wants to clean up a mess caused by a 'free spirit'.

What kinds of messes are you even referring to, out of curiosity? The post is about a man who wants to do meaningful work, so I'm missing the leap to "messes."

Many people have good intentions, but then in their emotional tantrums cause by their zeal, they will forget that law and order exists and will inevitably do more harm than good. So anyone that has ideas of going their own path, should temper it lawfully.

Re: I decided that I must live my life on my terms

#219

I finally made it to a point that I have no debt and racked up a considerable savings over the pandemic. I quit my job a couple months ago (have a side consulting gig that pays 80% of my expenses for minimal hours) and I have been loving it. I’m so busy! In the past week I have been working on perfecting a French omelette, started sprouting some heirloom seeds for a patio garden, hosted a dinner party, going on hikes…

If you don't mind my asking, what is your side consulting gig? Is it in software?

Yes, in software. More data science related. Only got it because an old boss of mine reached out to me to do some side work.

Re: I decided that I must live my life on my terms

#220

I finally made it to a point that I have no debt and racked up a considerable savings over the pandemic. I quit my job a couple months ago (have a side consulting gig that pays 80% of my expenses for minimal hours) and I have been loving it. I’m so busy! In the past week I have been working on perfecting a French omelette, started sprouting some heirloom seeds for a patio garden, hosted a dinner party, going on hikes…

How much did you save? 20k on clothes and shoes is a lot lol. I'm kinda thinking of doing the same general thing though if I can. Minimal hours would be awesome

Enough to put 20-30% down on a very nice condo/town-house pre-pandemic in HCOL area. That was my goal for the money. I’ve given up on that for the time being. I can rent for cheaper, so took a little chunk and had fun with it (I’m not a flashy person in other respects, I bought my car used for 15k 5 years ago).
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