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Why I Quit Tech and Became a Therapist

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Re: Why I Quit Tech and Became a Therapist

#211

Post by ben7799 »

genezeta wrote: post #175
ben7799 wrote: post #90

Maybe too many people are trying to find all their meaning in life through their work. It's not a recipe for success for most people, I think the media plays it up a bit too much. They're only covering the success stories in terms of people who are single minded and who make their work everything. The author of the article doesn't mention any relationships or other interests in life, no passion for anything but work.…

> Maybe too many people are trying to find all their meaning in life through their work. You probably shouldn't make your "meaning in life" reside completely in your work. But then again, you can't work at a job that is completely meaningless to you. The problem with burnout generally comes from the feeling of pointlessness. And IT excels at that feeling. We 've built an industry that is accustomed -almost to the poi…

You make a bunch of great points.

A lot of the "No Accountability" stuff to me started to appear about the same time as Agile. Agile removed most of management's accountability and product management's accountability. They could do whatever they want, engineering can just pivot on a dime when they're wrong. If PM asked you to build something ridiculous it's waved away through Agile, it was always too hard to figure out what to build before you build it, so PM can do no wrong.

I think some of the "No accountability" trends on the developer side are just a response.

But all of it makes the workplace a lot harder to stomach.

Re: Why I Quit Tech and Became a Therapist

#212

Post by morningmoon »

I applaud the author for sharing their life experience. Just sharing this may help others.

I want to add that these choices aren't black and white. Tech and helping people aren't mutually exclusive things. The author could have mixed therapy with his tech experience and made websites, apps, or services that helped people with career or relationship problems. Or worked towards getting an IT job at a psychology non-profit. I know it's a simplistic example, but look at the impact a simple app like Calm had on exposing people to meditation and therapeutic techniques.

It's all connected. Nutrition, relationships, rest, play, and work. There's so many opportunities to help people outside of paying a licensed therapist. One way to look at it is to go where people are spending their time: on the phone. We desperately need more wellness awareness where people are already spending their attention.

Re: Why I Quit Tech and Became a Therapist

#213

Post by jerkstate »

I'm a tech worker but I have a network of friends who are therapists and social workers. I hope OP realizes that therapy is a slog and many of your clients won't get better. Self-care for therapists is even more important than tech workers because you hear about terrible things day in and day out, and your clients (and their families) can be downright abusive at times. Also, it is much less financially lucrative than tech work. Internship lasts at least 2 years and many positions are unpaid or paid at essentially minimum wage, and pay does not get a whole lot better until you are running a private practice for wealthy clients (which depending on your opinions you might consider less rewarding than helping needier people). So I hope the OP is realistic about how this will impact their financial and emotional trajectory in life. All that being said, the skills you learn in training are useful to any walk of life. I frequently consult with these friends about how to deal with work situations, child rearing, and they are able to give me really amazing insights and help me navigate those situations. But just be honest with yourself as you go through the process, and be thankful that you have a lucrative fallback if needed.

Re: Why I Quit Tech and Became a Therapist

#214

Post by andromedavision »

balabaster wrote: post #207
andromedavision wrote: post #202

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That Kipling poem is flawless. Injecting virtue signalling dilutes its beauty. They don't even go together. This is personal for me because it is the most profound thing I've ever read. For someone to come and refer to it as sexist is demeaning. Savor it and quit being so wound up is all I'm saying. There's a place for everything and this was ill-placed.

I agree wholeheartedly. I've always loved this poem. I think a lot of the values it presents are sadly lost in today's culture - we're in a post-chivalric era alas. But these are the values I grew up with and as a result form the man I am today. This is what happens when your childhood heroes and role models come from the pages of Robin Hood, Les Miserables and The Three Musketeers. As with all though, you either evo…

> ...sadly lost in today's culture - we're in a post-chivalric era alas. But these are the values I grew up with

Exactly this. It can be tough but you pick up your load and move valiantly forward.

Re: Why I Quit Tech and Became a Therapist

#215

Post by coroxout »

shade wrote: post #27
sleepysysadmin wrote: post #9

There is a severe workplace burnout problem in IT(especially MSPs); which when not addressed grows into bigger mental health issues and even literal sicknesses. There just isn't enough skilled IT people. The industry is immature and is bottom heavy. The top performers and seniors, are then overwhelmed with work and the business is unable to hire more senior people to reduce workload. Then the business keeps growing a…

I've commented on this previously, but I think there's some aspects of the tech industry that really do lead to burnout, depression, and cynicism among the people who work in it - and this applies to both software dev and IT support. We spend so much time dealing with tools that tend to be extremely pedantic and detail-focused. We're constantly thinking about all of the stuff that's gone wrong with our applications p…

"We're constantly thinking about all of the stuff that's gone wrong with our applications previously, what new things could go wrong with them now"

I really feel this. I'm supposed to be half coding and half support but the support has expanded to fill all my time and I don't write anything more than 30-line kludges that only I will see any more.

That's partly just the nature of support always taking up all the time, but also I feel really paralysed when it comes to coding, because I just think of all the stupid corner cases I've been bitten by and how bad it felt to lose data or cause downtime or just look stupid.

And yes, the answer might be "write more test cases, code review" but that little voice in the back of my head goes "you thought you'd caught all the edge cases last time, and it still did a dumb thing you'd never thought of". I find it really demotivating, and start to put things off until I feel cleverer (which I never do), and then my lack of productivity depresses me, perhaps to the point you'd call "burnout" even.

Well, glad I'm not alone. Any tips on thinking my way around it welcome.

Re: Why I Quit Tech and Became a Therapist

#216

Post by pureliquidhw »

jeofken wrote: post #169

For years I struggled to become financially independent (as Mr Money Mustache). Years upon years of watching the clock until it hit 17:30, hating the dumb coders who made a mess for me to clean up (because I know FP, and if we had types these bugs wouldn’t be here in the first place!). A year ago, I pulled the plug, and retired. Finally, I could work on my dream project every day. I did so for 6 months, and travelled…

You're still enjoying the FI part of FIRE. Being financially independent means you can just leave when shit gets intolerable, which in-turn raises your level of tolerance for, well, shit.

Once upon a time, I hit my number,the FI mark. Then I had a kid. As soon as I had the liability of a child, I was no longer truly FI. I felt the walls at work close in again. It has much less to do with the work and the processes and the people. I think it is a sense of control and ability to leave, or lack thereof, that drives emotions at work. I can't walk away anymore and that makes it harder to tolerate the intolerable.

Re: Why I Quit Tech and Became a Therapist

#217

Post by mfoy_ »

andromedavision wrote: post #202
Baeocystin wrote: post #199

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Letting people know your honest thoughts in a straightforward manner is important. I know plenty of folks who hold opinions along the same line as the person you replied to. They are usually various degrees of shocked when I give them civil yet straightforward pushback, and more often then one may think, when done in person, it leads to real discussion, and ideas outside of normal worldview enter both our minds. It i…

That Kipling poem is flawless. Injecting virtue signalling dilutes its beauty. They don't even go together. This is personal for me because it is the most profound thing I've ever read. For someone to come and refer to it as sexist is demeaning. Savor it and quit being so wound up is all I'm saying. There's a place for everything and this was ill-placed.

I think it's very possible to read the last few lines in a non-gendered light. You have to want it to be misogynistic in order to interpret it as such.

Re: Why I Quit Tech and Became a Therapist

#218

Post by zestyping »

anoplus wrote: post #134
nabnob wrote: post #36

I've been having the same existential crisis for a couple years now. I started working at a FAANG company right out of college, then after a bunch of personal health problems ended up taking a leave of absence that I didn't return from. I took a long break from software and started learning politics, philosophy, and history, and eventually came to the conclusion that most of the world's problems are social/political…

I strongly relate to this comment as a programmer. Sometimes when a colleague asks me: "Why life is hard?", I answer: "Because its hard for people to get along" My answer is just aggregation of all biggest problems I face in my life and programming. The biggest challenges often have to do with cooperation between 2 or more people.

Then I encourage you wholeheartedly to work on that problem! It is really among the most important things of all.

Re: Why I Quit Tech and Became a Therapist

#219

Post by andromedavision »

mfoy_ wrote: post #217
andromedavision wrote: post #202

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That Kipling poem is flawless. Injecting virtue signalling dilutes its beauty. They don't even go together. This is personal for me because it is the most profound thing I've ever read. For someone to come and refer to it as sexist is demeaning. Savor it and quit being so wound up is all I'm saying. There's a place for everything and this was ill-placed.

I think it's very possible to read the last few lines in a non-gendered light. You have to want it to be misogynistic in order to interpret it as such.

Absolutely. It's incredibly innocuous.

Re: Why I Quit Tech and Became a Therapist

#220

Post by [deleted] »

yardie wrote: post #181
barberousse wrote: post #131

Earlier quoted context omitted.

>So the industry (in terms of people experience) is bottom-heavy in the work pool. Places that can afford it are top heavy in talent+experience, and everyone else is bottom-heavy in low experience, and neither type of place is doing anything to really address their problems long-term. When I came to my company I was a junior front-end engineer with no CS degree. A few months in or so in I'm apart of a post-work discu…

Liberal arts grad here. It is infuriating how much I here how schools are a waste of time (money at today's rates, I totally agree). Like university is the only place you can go to learn things. And the only way to make a living is through the degree you earned in university.

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