Earlier quoted context omitted.
"I want your opinion on...." for me is a potential landmine. Such questions can be used to detect potential troublemakers. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hundred_Flowers_Campaign In college 10 years+ ago, one of my roommates had a laptop with 500MB ram and took a 500MB ram chip from anther room mate's laptop to speed up a game he was playing. He did this without the knowledge or permission of the laptop's owner who wa…
I’ve always been wary of one-to-ones with the manager for the same reason. Is it ever good to talk about problems with a manager, especially regarding other people? It’s like the prisoner’s dilemma. I still don’t know what’s best for me to talk about in this setting.
Good managers are far rarer than good programmers, though.
A decent litmus test for whether your manager can help with these kinds of problems is whether they've been on lots of productive projects and whether everyone likes them.
If both things are true, they likely are quite good at navigating interpersonal conflicts and arriving at win-win outcomes. It's nigh-impossible to achieve both those outcomes in a large organization otherwise.