How do you manage to have a life? • Hacker News Board

Re: How do you manage to have a life?

#21

Post by digitalzombie » Sun, Sep 01, 2013, 11:10 AM UTC

I have a good resume and a chill work place (kinda). So I work 8 hours mostly. If I fear that they'll get mad that I'm not working hard enough then fuck it, I'm finding another job. My career is not going to take over and force me to sacrifice my life.

But I chose to live nearby a university so I go to Starbuck and stuff and talk to students there, mostly women.

On Friday and Sat I go out and hit on women at clubs. Shrug. I'm also going to go to the University gym twice a week and take some improv and probably vocal coach. I also chose to stay in touch and live nearby an area where my friends are within a 50 miles radius.

Spend those money on hobbies and building your life.

Re: How do you manage to have a life?

#22

Post by meerita » Sun, Sep 01, 2013, 9:36 PM UTC

I came to the city of Barcelona without having friends. Being Latin I had no trouble socializing with Europeans, the trick is don't give a about trying. I made friends quickly and still making friends until today (11 and a half years have passed).

The main tactic I've took was to make friends with people from work. This introduced me to the social circle of several people, especially second tier, friends of my coworkers. This had good crop of friends but not enough nor quality.

The second tactic I've took was dating women. Every woman I met in person I was proposing stuff, to do things, practically, this was my shameless attitude and gave many fruits, especially because Europeans love the active attitude to the passive one. Dating out with girls I met more friendly people, but the bad thing was that leaving the girl i was losing also mostly of their friends.

The third tactic was going to conferences and meetups small issues where I met people who liked the same thing to me, basically, is where most friends did and where I had more sexual adventures too :). Basically, after meetups I invited everyone to party at my flat, or dinner, the usual stuff europeans do.

After 11 years I can not complain, I feel supported by my friends.

What I learned is: learn more languages to speak the the most possible people and be open, relaxed and careless. Life came a bit easier this way. I don't know if this can apply perfectly at USA but in Europe isn't so easy as in Latinamerica.

Re: How do you manage to have a life?

#23

Post by andrewcooke » Mon, Sep 02, 2013, 12:35 AM UTC

cautious wrote: post #5

YuriNiyazov wrote: post #4

Earlier quoted context omitted.

meetup.com

I visit it from time to time but it seems to be limited to entrepreneurial meetups around here (Chile).

you could go to the dynlang meetings and chat to people there, or signup for the startup digest and see if there's something to get involved with there, or try out hackerspace (something i am planning to do).

http://www.meetup.com/dynlangchile/ https://www.startupdigest.com/digests/chile (email carlos - he's the kind of guy who's always happy to chat to anyone!) http://stgomakerspace.com/

they're all kind of nerdy, but once you know people you can branch out...

if you're already into something, like climbing or mountain biking, or skiing, i bet there are groups you can join. i went mountain biking a couple of times out east and met people just because we were getting injured together... or how about the local music scene? you could try going to concerts (look in la tercera or el ciudadano or the clinic something). there are courses at cine hoyts la reina (easy to get to on metro) where you go watch films and chat about them (my partner just signed up for one, but she's taken and probably twice your age anyway). the craze last summer (i think, maybe the year before - i am old and out of touch) was doing circus tricks. you could pay to learn. seemed like a way to meet people. or dancing lessons. do you play football? many people here play once a week for fun - try your local sports centre and see if they have a noticeboard.

what nationality / colour are you? if you're white here, getting a date should not be so hard! don't any co-workers have sisters? if you don't speak spanish well, offer english lessons to cute natives (how can that possibly fail? just stick some fliers up... you can even get paid at the same time! this is such a good idea i want to be single again)

oh, and get invited to a barbecue on the 18th. you must work with some chileans? i'd guess someone would be happy to invite you to a barbecue. you can meet people there. everyone will be at a barbecue that day.

or if violence is more your thing, well, a week before...

another idea - get involved with the elections. i bet they're looking for volunteers.

Re: How do you manage to have a life?

#24

Post by SJALLEN » Thu, Sep 05, 2013, 1:04 AM UTC

sometimes we can experience a sense of "something missing" - it could be a small voice or internal sense that something awaits us - Joseph Campbell called this the "call to adventure"...if we do not respond by stepping out of our comfort zone, life will usually conspire to force us out into new, challenging, unknown realms.

What might be calling you?