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How Golden Is Silence, Actually?

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Re: How Golden Is Silence, Actually?

#21

Post by doublerabbit »

dnemmers wrote: post #15
doublerabbit wrote: post #14

I live in a apartment with a courtyard, it's taken me 10 years of knocking on folks doors. Normally it's new tenants who don't know how much noise they make and I have to ask them nicely if they could turn down their devices and show consideration. There have groans, feuds and aggressiveness towards me for asking for peace. I'm not unreasonable. If you wish to have a party, do it adult without DJs blaring till 3am. M…

Even though the restaurant closes at 11, doesn't meant there isn't plenty of cleaning and 'closing' still left to do by the staff, often into the 'wee' hours.

These restaurants are locked with shutters down at 11.

What I presume is that the cool down is on a uncalibrated timing like unfair traffic lights but you can't really demonstrate this as they just shrug and tell you it's not their problem.

Re: How Golden Is Silence, Actually?

#22

Post by ColdStream »

nephihaha wrote: post #20
jordwest wrote: post #12

I’ve been on several silent retreats now and one of the most surprising discoveries was just how much speaking is unnecessary. Without the pressure to speak amongst others, it became clear that I often said things out of anxiety - fear of looking weird or of making the other person uncomfortable. Nowadays I rarely speak when I feel that pressure and paradoxically it has led to far deeper relationships and more intere…

I've done silent retreats as well, but I'm not a big fan. I live on my own and get plenty of silence that way. Being around other silent people was an odd experience, sort of like being on the train with people staring into space. It reminded me of being sent to Coventry. I did find it easy to communicate on silent retreat but not enjoyable. I just went off and read a book or took a walk.

Seems like you have already figured out a means that works for you. What works for some doesn't work for others. What is a problem for some, isn't a problem for others.

Sort of like how some folks say 'everyone should meditate.' Maybe that worked for them and the issues they had, and that is brilliant, but lots of people don't have that problem or that response doesn't fit them.

Re: How Golden Is Silence, Actually?

#23

Post by vouaobrasil »

nradov wrote: post #16
doublerabbit wrote: post #14

I live in a apartment with a courtyard, it's taken me 10 years of knocking on folks doors. Normally it's new tenants who don't know how much noise they make and I have to ask them nicely if they could turn down their devices and show consideration. There have groans, feuds and aggressiveness towards me for asking for peace. I'm not unreasonable. If you wish to have a party, do it adult without DJs blaring till 3am. M…

Other HN users keep telling us that we should support dense housing development. I think those people have never lived in an apartment complex with trashy neighbors.

It's usually because they're not the ones living in the dense housing, or will ever.

Re: How Golden Is Silence, Actually?

#24

Post by sam1r »

pmontra wrote: post #6
herodoturtle wrote: post #2

Article is behind a paywall for me. Odd that it’s on HN front page :-/

Reader mode bypasses it. It's only a JS layer on top of content that's already inside the HTML doc. Disabling first party JS works too, using umatrix or similar tools. The site works perfectly without JS. Edit: because of all of that, of course view source bypasses the paywall too and reveals tons of inlined CSS.

This. Comment. ^ is going to change my life.

Thank you!! I had no idea, and this is such an elegant fix.

Re: How Golden Is Silence, Actually?

#25

Post by sam1r »

sam1r wrote: post #24
pmontra wrote: post #6

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Reader mode bypasses it. It's only a JS layer on top of content that's already inside the HTML doc. Disabling first party JS works too, using umatrix or similar tools. The site works perfectly without JS. Edit: because of all of that, of course view source bypasses the paywall too and reveals tons of inlined CSS.

This. Comment. ^ is going to change my life. Thank you!! I had no idea, and this is such an elegant fix.

“Refresh, and quickly just click the reader button as the page loads slow on mobile, anyways”

Re: How Golden Is Silence, Actually?

#26

Post by Foreignborn »

nradov wrote: post #16
doublerabbit wrote: post #14

I live in a apartment with a courtyard, it's taken me 10 years of knocking on folks doors. Normally it's new tenants who don't know how much noise they make and I have to ask them nicely if they could turn down their devices and show consideration. There have groans, feuds and aggressiveness towards me for asking for peace. I'm not unreasonable. If you wish to have a party, do it adult without DJs blaring till 3am. M…

Other HN users keep telling us that we should support dense housing development. I think those people have never lived in an apartment complex with trashy neighbors.

i live in shibuya and i have countless videos where it’s just make the damn building with noise in mind (RC, interior insulation, gapped flooring, etc).

it’s very possible.

(btw I am as country bumpkin as they come, my village has less than 200 people so i understand rural living.)

Re: How Golden Is Silence, Actually?

#27

Post by zdragnar »

ColdStream wrote: post #22
nephihaha wrote: post #20

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I've done silent retreats as well, but I'm not a big fan. I live on my own and get plenty of silence that way. Being around other silent people was an odd experience, sort of like being on the train with people staring into space. It reminded me of being sent to Coventry. I did find it easy to communicate on silent retreat but not enjoyable. I just went off and read a book or took a walk.

Seems like you have already figured out a means that works for you. What works for some doesn't work for others. What is a problem for some, isn't a problem for others. Sort of like how some folks say 'everyone should meditate.' Maybe that worked for them and the issues they had, and that is brilliant, but lots of people don't have that problem or that response doesn't fit them.

It's worth pointing out at least that there is a qualitative difference between silence in isolation, and being around people who are intentionally being silent.

I live in a rural area and don't get much noise at all other than wind and animal noises when I'm home alone. It is comfortable precisely because it isn't artificial. Going to a silent retreat means being around people who are intentionally suppressing their desire to speak and being expected to fit in. It is an intentional change in behavior, which starts out uncomfortable.

Re: How Golden Is Silence, Actually?

#28

Post by caymanjim »

doublerabbit wrote: post #14

I live in a apartment with a courtyard, it's taken me 10 years of knocking on folks doors. Normally it's new tenants who don't know how much noise they make and I have to ask them nicely if they could turn down their devices and show consideration. There have groans, feuds and aggressiveness towards me for asking for peace. I'm not unreasonable. If you wish to have a party, do it adult without DJs blaring till 3am. M…

I can relate, but the problem here is that you shouldn't live in an apartment. I never will again, for all the reasons you outlined. It's unreasonable to expect quiet in apartments. People have different schedules, they're different ages, and some are just assholes.

Re: How Golden Is Silence, Actually?

#30

Post by strken »

nradov wrote: post #16
doublerabbit wrote: post #14

I live in a apartment with a courtyard, it's taken me 10 years of knocking on folks doors. Normally it's new tenants who don't know how much noise they make and I have to ask them nicely if they could turn down their devices and show consideration. There have groans, feuds and aggressiveness towards me for asking for peace. I'm not unreasonable. If you wish to have a party, do it adult without DJs blaring till 3am. M…

Other HN users keep telling us that we should support dense housing development. I think those people have never lived in an apartment complex with trashy neighbors.

I've lived in an apartment complex with weirdos before, including one lady who used to scream at random times, but we basically couldn't hear them. The screaming lady was only audible if the window was open.

All the apartments were separated by brick or concrete, the front doors had lobbies that acted as baffles, and all the living areas were carpeted and had good thick ceilings.

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