I'd tell you a UDP joke… • Hacker News Board

Re: I'd tell you a UDP joke…

#21

Post by Neywiny » Sun, Jan 11, 2026, 11:44 PM UTC

divbzero wrote: post #19

Or alternatively: > I would UDP joke tell you a… but you get it might not.

Or alternatively:

> I would UDP joke tell you a… but you get it might not.

Re: I'd tell you a UDP joke…

#22

Post by LeoPanthera » Mon, Jan 12, 2026, 12:06 AM UTC

"Hi, I'd like to hear a TCP joke."

"Hello, would you like to hear a TCP joke?"

"Yes, I'd like to hear a TCP joke."

"OK, I'll tell you a TCP joke."

"Ok, I will hear a TCP joke."

"Are you ready to hear a TCP joke?"

"Yes, I am ready to hear a TCP joke."

"Ok, I am about to send the TCP joke. It will last 10 seconds, it has two characters, it does not have a setting, it ends with a punchline."

"Ok, I am ready to get your TCP joke that will last 10 seconds, has two characters, does not have an explicit setting, and ends with a punchline."

"I'm sorry, your connection has timed out. Hello, would you like to hear a TCP joke?"

Re: I'd tell you a UDP joke…

#23

Post by CPLX » Mon, Jan 12, 2026, 12:13 AM UTC

I'd share my joke about HTTP here, but it makes me feel insecure.

Re: I'd tell you a UDP joke…

#24

Post by dmurray » Mon, Jan 12, 2026, 12:17 AM UTC

I was asked in an interview to explain the difference between TCP and UDP.

I knew about enough to fill an index card: enough for an adequate interview answer, but not enough that I would relish getting follow-up questions.

While deciding what to say I started with this joke. The interviewer laughed and moved on to the next question. I got the job offer.

Re: I'd tell you a UDP joke…

#25

Post by paxcoder » Mon, Jan 12, 2026, 12:17 AM UTC

Neywiny wrote: post #21

divbzero wrote: post #19

Or alternatively: > I would UDP joke tell you a… but you get it might not.

Or alternatively: > I would UDP joke tell you a… but you get it might not.

[dead]

Re: I'd tell you a UDP joke…

#26

Post by lsc4719 » Mon, Jan 12, 2026, 12:29 AM UTC

CPLX wrote: post #23

I'd share my joke about HTTP here, but it makes me feel insecure.

Mix it with TLS joke

Re: I'd tell you a UDP joke…

#27

Post by lucb1e » Mon, Jan 12, 2026, 12:52 AM UTC

mlhpdx wrote: post #10

There are two kinds of people when it comes to UDP.

Which are those?

Btw, it reminds me of "10 kinds of people, those who understand binary and those who don't"

Re: I'd tell you a UDP joke…

#28

Post by charcircuit » Mon, Jan 12, 2026, 1:28 AM UTC

You can't guarantee delivery of any message. This is the basis of the 2 generals problem.

Re: I'd tell you a UDP joke…

#29

Post by bigstrat2003 » Mon, Jan 12, 2026, 1:45 AM UTC

I can tell you a DNS joke, but be aware that it might take 8 hours for everyone to get it.

Re: I'd tell you a UDP joke…

#30

Post by kuekacang » Mon, Jan 12, 2026, 1:47 AM UTC

divbzero wrote: post #19

Or alternatively: > I would UDP joke tell you a… but you get it might not.

> A UDP joke I would tell you... but you might get it not