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The Loneliness Epidemic Is a Security Crisis

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Re: The Loneliness Epidemic Is a Security Crisis

#21

Post by ronnier »

autobodie wrote: post #19
ronnier wrote: post #13

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I work on this problem at one of the world’s largest social media companies. I deal with it 7 days a week for several years now. This is my life and it’s extremely sad as to how people are being exploited in these scams.

Why do avaiable sources claim otherwise? Statista has a report indicating 53% of victims are men and 47% of victims are women. https://www.statista.com/statistics/1481218/us-online-dating... Additionally, the FTC says women report significantly higher financial losses than men. https://www.ftc.gov/news-events/data-visualizations/data-spo...

possible reasons I can think of 1) these are based on self reporting and it’s very possible men report at lower rates. 2) it’s possible that the scams happen outside of the areas where I have insights (social media)

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic Is a Security Crisis

#22

Post by knighthack »

autobodie wrote: post #10
ronnier wrote: post #5

> Romance scams cost victims hundreds of millions of dollars a year. As people grow increasingly isolated “People” is accurate but this is largely a male dominated issue. Men are targeted at higher rates and fall for these scams at much higher rates. Men need to be taught that random unknown women will largely not message them at random for sex. It’s almost always a scam. These scammers are playing on the psychology…

Source? A lot of the investigative reporting I've seen covers women targets. Maybe they just think women make better stories, but women do spend more time on dating apps than men. Women participate differently, but they definitely participate, and women are extremely vulnerable to emotional exploitation.

"...women do spend more time on dating apps than men"

How is that statement even true, when there are often more men than women on dating apps, by a significant factor?

There are also studies showing just how difficult women are to retain on dating apps; behind the scenes, a lot more has to be done in the first 24 hours to ensure women match and meet someone of interest so that they stay in the pool.

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic Is a Security Crisis

#23

Post by pelagicAustral »

cdrini wrote: post #9
ronnier wrote: post #5

> Romance scams cost victims hundreds of millions of dollars a year. As people grow increasingly isolated “People” is accurate but this is largely a male dominated issue. Men are targeted at higher rates and fall for these scams at much higher rates. Men need to be taught that random unknown women will largely not message them at random for sex. It’s almost always a scam. These scammers are playing on the psychology…

I don't think this is true, I've only ever seen women talk about losing money due to romance scams on the news. Do you have any citations?

Well, it could be a matter of woman, in this case, being far more willing to come forward and talk about their experience. The male ego being fragile and all... Sort of the same that happens with domestic violence, there is a segment of the male population that have been victim of abuse, but when push comes to shove, anything related to that subject is don't ask, don't tell.

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic Is a Security Crisis

#24

Post by autobodie »

ronnier wrote: post #21
autobodie wrote: post #19

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Why do avaiable sources claim otherwise? Statista has a report indicating 53% of victims are men and 47% of victims are women. https://www.statista.com/statistics/1481218/us-online-dating... Additionally, the FTC says women report significantly higher financial losses than men. https://www.ftc.gov/news-events/data-visualizations/data-spo...

possible reasons I can think of 1) these are based on self reporting and it’s very possible men report at lower rates. 2) it’s possible that the scams happen outside of the areas where I have insights (social media)

Also, the specific social media network you work at would skew your perspective.

I would bet money that romance scam victims are overwhelmingly men on TikTok but overwhelmingly women on Facebook.

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic Is a Security Crisis

#25

Post by wink »

KittenInABox wrote: post #3

More and more I feel like online spaces are far more insidiously dangerous than anticipated. We have bots or malicious actors among the userbase explicitly to sow dissent and spin the quality of discussion downwards. We have algorithms that push content based on engagement, which isn't actually connection or anything resembling engaging with community. We then have online cultures that encourage lowering empathy for…

I don't get how or why it seems to have gotten worse in the last 20-25 years.

I was a very online teenager at the end of the 90s and I have formed friendships that last to this day. Or at least staying in touch. And it's not just me, it's the same for a lot of people I got to know offline who have different such circles.

Maybe because it was just a smaller circle of people? Maybe because it was so not normal that people were much more cautious? Or because half of the online venues were run by hobbyists? Or because no companies and bots and people trying to make money were involved. Probably the latter.

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic Is a Security Crisis

#26

Post by KittenInABox »

knighthack wrote: post #22
autobodie wrote: post #10

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Source? A lot of the investigative reporting I've seen covers women targets. Maybe they just think women make better stories, but women do spend more time on dating apps than men. Women participate differently, but they definitely participate, and women are extremely vulnerable to emotional exploitation.

"...women do spend more time on dating apps than men" How is that statement even true, when there are often more men than women on dating apps, by a significant factor? There are also studies showing just how difficult women are to retain on dating apps; behind the scenes, a lot more has to be done in the first 24 hours to ensure women match and meet someone of interest so that they stay in the pool.

I mean I definitely feel that among my age (late/mid 20s, early 30s) cohort plenty of women use dating apps and have lots of dates lined up, talk to each other about profiles they come across, and take communal notes on which men they've had bad dates with to warn their friends... It seems like using dating apps has become more of a hobby for some of these women, especially since a bunch of women in my sphere are poly. These aren't particularly lonely women though, as obviously I am less likely to encounter lonely people on account of lonely people statistically encountering less people.

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic Is a Security Crisis

#27

Post by autobodie »

knighthack wrote: post #22
autobodie wrote: post #10

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Source? A lot of the investigative reporting I've seen covers women targets. Maybe they just think women make better stories, but women do spend more time on dating apps than men. Women participate differently, but they definitely participate, and women are extremely vulnerable to emotional exploitation.

"...women do spend more time on dating apps than men" How is that statement even true, when there are often more men than women on dating apps, by a significant factor? There are also studies showing just how difficult women are to retain on dating apps; behind the scenes, a lot more has to be done in the first 24 hours to ensure women match and meet someone of interest so that they stay in the pool.

Women spend more total time browsing. There was an amazing article on HN last week showing this but I can't find the link.

Don't confuse total users or interactions with time spent.

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic Is a Security Crisis

#28

Post by ronnier »

knighthack wrote: post #22
autobodie wrote: post #10

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Source? A lot of the investigative reporting I've seen covers women targets. Maybe they just think women make better stories, but women do spend more time on dating apps than men. Women participate differently, but they definitely participate, and women are extremely vulnerable to emotional exploitation.

"...women do spend more time on dating apps than men" How is that statement even true, when there are often more men than women on dating apps, by a significant factor? There are also studies showing just how difficult women are to retain on dating apps; behind the scenes, a lot more has to be done in the first 24 hours to ensure women match and meet someone of interest so that they stay in the pool.

https://datingzest.com/tinder-statistics/

This claims tinder is 78% male. Not sure of the others.

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic Is a Security Crisis

#29

Post by [deleted] »

pelagicAustral wrote: post #23
cdrini wrote: post #9

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I don't think this is true, I've only ever seen women talk about losing money due to romance scams on the news. Do you have any citations?

Well, it could be a matter of woman, in this case, being far more willing to come forward and talk about their experience. The male ego being fragile and all... Sort of the same that happens with domestic violence, there is a segment of the male population that have been victim of abuse, but when push comes to shove, anything related to that subject is don't ask, don't tell.

[deleted]

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic Is a Security Crisis

#30

Post by KittenInABox »

wink wrote: post #25
KittenInABox wrote: post #3

More and more I feel like online spaces are far more insidiously dangerous than anticipated. We have bots or malicious actors among the userbase explicitly to sow dissent and spin the quality of discussion downwards. We have algorithms that push content based on engagement, which isn't actually connection or anything resembling engaging with community. We then have online cultures that encourage lowering empathy for…

I don't get how or why it seems to have gotten worse in the last 20-25 years. I was a very online teenager at the end of the 90s and I have formed friendships that last to this day. Or at least staying in touch. And it's not just me, it's the same for a lot of people I got to know offline who have different such circles. Maybe because it was just a smaller circle of people? Maybe because it was so not normal that peo…

I'm also a little confused, because I remember such common empathy-lacking rhetoric like demanding boob pics of any proclaimed female on the internet being common in my tween online years. Or sending shock stuff as a joke (2girls1cup, tubgirl etc). So its not like the internet didn't have troll-y cesspits. And yet somehow something has changed such that as a population we've been trained against forming human connections. Even 4chan organized against scientology once upon a time, that required at minimum real organizational labor and forming some kind of community action. I can't imagine any similar thing happening now.
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