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Re: undefined

#21

Post by [deleted] »

silverquiet wrote: post #12
delichon wrote: post #2

I'm afraid this poor guy will be besieged by people who heard about a vacancy in San Francisco. I've unfortunately had my share of dead friends and relatives. I wish I could say that it somehow has made me stronger, more mature, but I'm afraid that the opposite is more true. Each is a trauma that I never entirely recover from. They make the world more bleak, confusing, cold, scary. And it makes it harder to comfort p…

So sleep tight kids… I think this is why religion is so important and I say that as someone who is incapable of believing in any.

[deleted]

Re: undefined

#22

Post by ShamelessC »

silverquiet wrote: post #12
delichon wrote: post #2

I'm afraid this poor guy will be besieged by people who heard about a vacancy in San Francisco. I've unfortunately had my share of dead friends and relatives. I wish I could say that it somehow has made me stronger, more mature, but I'm afraid that the opposite is more true. Each is a trauma that I never entirely recover from. They make the world more bleak, confusing, cold, scary. And it makes it harder to comfort p…

So sleep tight kids… I think this is why religion is so important and I say that as someone who is incapable of believing in any.

Well since those two things are at odds and you haven’t explained your stance more, your comment effectively serves as flamebait.

Re: undefined

#24

Post by jraph »

klodolph wrote: post #18
forgotusername6 wrote: post #8

There's a really confusing gap between grief, or what I thought grief should look like, when losing someone close and the indifference or mere sympathy that comes with hearing about the loss of someone you don't know. A number of years ago I found out that someone I knew from university had died. He was young, and the whole thing was just so genuinely confusing that I didn't know how to feel about it. I'm in a simila…

You’re not alone. I think it’s really common to question yourself and ask, “Is this how I should be feeling? How I’m supposed to be feeling? How I’m supposed to be acting?”

wrt feeling, fully agree, I think it happens to most of us, if not all.

But I believe you don't really have a say in the matter. I'm not sure you should be supposed to feel one way or another. You can only accept your feelings as is and others should accept how you feel too.

I think especially when someone close die, it is well known each of us has their own personal / specific way of reacting.

(of course you can prepare yourself to face expected situations to some extent; also of course, if you don't feel well you should seek help, especially if it lasts)

Re: undefined

#25

Post by anotherhue »

ShamelessC wrote: post #23
anotherhue wrote: post #17

This may be the victim https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-northern-ireland-26180127

Why would you try to expose that information?

Primarily to authenticate the story, secondarily to date it. People are already speaking like this is a recent thing, though TFA makes no claims. Instead it's over ten years old.

Re: undefined

#26

Post by HankB99 »

FB has been a little creepy about death. A FB "friend" (e.g. not a close friend) had died and about a year later FB started exhorting me to reconnect with him. I located his obituary and memorialized his account out of respect.

Too many times I've been invited to wish a deceased friend "happy birthday." I go to their page and find it memorialized. Nevertheless, there are many friends wishing them happy birthday, oblivious to the indication that the page has been memorialized.

The worse was the time my wife discovered her brother had died via FB. He had estranged himself from the family decades earlier, but still... A shared friend posted the status to his page, otherwise we might never have found out.

Re: undefined

#28

Post by mcmoor »

delichon wrote: post #2

I'm afraid this poor guy will be besieged by people who heard about a vacancy in San Francisco. I've unfortunately had my share of dead friends and relatives. I wish I could say that it somehow has made me stronger, more mature, but I'm afraid that the opposite is more true. Each is a trauma that I never entirely recover from. They make the world more bleak, confusing, cold, scary. And it makes it harder to comfort p…

A bit more general, I think the same about habits. "Everything will be alright, with time", or in this case "everyday it gets easier, but you gotta do it everyday" is a lie, it isn't a conveyer belt. If you get there it's under your own power.

Re: undefined

#29

Post by hackernewds »

delichon wrote: post #2

I'm afraid this poor guy will be besieged by people who heard about a vacancy in San Francisco. I've unfortunately had my share of dead friends and relatives. I wish I could say that it somehow has made me stronger, more mature, but I'm afraid that the opposite is more true. Each is a trauma that I never entirely recover from. They make the world more bleak, confusing, cold, scary. And it makes it harder to comfort p…

> this poor guy will be besieged by people who heard about a vacancy in San Francisco.

I struggle to believe this

Re: undefined

#30

Post by JKCalhoun »

ShamelessC wrote: post #22
silverquiet wrote: post #12

Earlier quoted context omitted.

So sleep tight kids… I think this is why religion is so important and I say that as someone who is incapable of believing in any.

Well since those two things are at odds and you haven’t explained your stance more, your comment effectively serves as flamebait.

I thought it made sense. Religion is the salve that I wish would work for me.
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