Only 2 genders listed though? Why does ever app/service like this make this assumption
Gender and Age Differences in Love Styles and Attitudes
21–30 of 69 posts
Re: Gender and Age Differences in Love Styles and Attitudes
#22Only 2 genders listed though? Why does ever app/service like this make this assumption
Probably because intersexuality is so rare that there's not enough data.
Re: Gender and Age Differences in Love Styles and Attitudes
#23Is there even a consensus that love languages are a valid concept? I ask because it's hard to see how falsifiable the idea is, reading about love languages seems highly "westernized" when love is a universal feeling not bound by culture.
How do love languages apply to women in Saudi Arabia or Papua New Guinea? What about subsistence farming communities in Africa? What about native tribes in Brazil or Colombia?
IDK, love languages seem like any other pop psychology fad like Myers–Briggs or whatever came before it then promptly forgotten.
Re: Gender and Age Differences in Love Styles and Attitudes
#24Only 2 genders listed though? Why does ever app/service like this make this assumption
Probably because intersexuality is so rare that there's not enough data.
intersexuality concerns sex, not gender, where non-binary, genderqueer, etc. individuals exist. The social construct of gender is what is being studied here
Re: Gender and Age Differences in Love Styles and Attitudes
#25Only 2 genders listed though? Why does ever app/service like this make this assumption
The OP says, under "Methodology notes":
> Non-binary and “other” genders are excluded from this study due to lack of sample size.
Re: Gender and Age Differences in Love Styles and Attitudes
#26No wonder that a website based around personality testing that describes the author's INTP score would uncritically engage with the ideas of love languages and attitudes - former of which is based on the anecdotal observations of a priest and was never well-validated by science
Re: Gender and Age Differences in Love Styles and Attitudes
#27All things considered, I was expecting there to be much higher gap between genders and ages. At only one point is there more than a 10% difference. In my experience men and women claim entirely different wants and needs.
There is. Massively so. https://www.reddit.com/r/TinderData/
Basically this just tells me that people lie on personality tests, or they interpret questions differently. Behaviorism is the only science in psychology. Question answering should be considered a behavior, and not a reflection of internal characteristics. In that light, you essentially have, among men mostly, a behavior, direct presentation of mating intentions, which has been consistently punished, and the opposite behavior, reflection of female mating desires, which has been inconsistently rewarded. The result is either duplicity or avoidance. It seems that the reverse phenomenon may occur for expectations later in the relationship, as evidenced by females initiating 90% of divorces among college-educated women.
Re: Gender and Age Differences in Love Styles and Attitudes
#28No wonder that a website based around personality testing that describes the author's INTP score would uncritically engage with the ideas of love languages and attitudes - former of which is based on the anecdotal observations of a priest and was never well-validated by science
I agree, an INTP would usually be more analytical
Re: Gender and Age Differences in Love Styles and Attitudes
#29Earlier quoted context omitted.
I thought I had that desire most of my life and recently figured out that was far more about my major anxiety to be able to provide quality "service" (as the article calls it) in all relationships, from casual conversation to romantic. Obviously, there are still times I want to be alone, but I'm more aware if it's due to anxiety and try to deal with that feeling if it is. That's just what I figured out for myself, no…
That's a really powerful self-discovery. Obviously some people are more introverted than others, but introversion has more to do with how we handle (over)stimulation than it does desire for social connection and acceptance. Humans are incredibly social creatures by nature. Even the most introverted people usually want connection.
I'm extremely fortunate to have a partner that valued what we had enough to stick around for a long time but, this past year, it was starting to reach a breaking point. That lead to big talks, some scary but polite, some loud and angry. A lifetimes worth of under-the-surface stuff all came out over just a few months.
What I think we figured out is that we have "compatible" (co-enabling) anxieties that keep our relationship mostly functional. That feels like a drastic over-simplification but accurate, I think. All I know is it feels like the most emotionally productive year of my life and our relationship is way better now. However, I still haven't figured out how to tone down the anxiety much :)
Re: Gender and Age Differences in Love Styles and Attitudes
#30No wonder that a website based around personality testing that describes the author's INTP score would uncritically engage with the ideas of love languages and attitudes - former of which is based on the anecdotal observations of a priest and was never well-validated by science
I think love languages are good tool for getting on the same page 1:1 with a partner, but they're only marginally more useful than horoscopes. Things like "my partner really appreciates if I've got my arm around them while watching a movie" or "my partner appreciates if I get a pot of coffee going while they're in the shower" are good things to establish, and love languages are a good lens to establish them. But so many people want concise objective measures of who people are, and put way more weight on things than they deserve.