The vast majority of Psychological findings do not stand up over time. Of all the science being done they have by far the largest replication issue and some of the findings have caused a lot of medical harm. I don't think it can grow up to objective findings and become properly scientific in most cases so we should for the most part not pay any attention to them they just don't have the proof.
It’s time to let the five stages of grief die (2019)
21–30 of 39 posts
Re: It’s time to let the five stages of grief die (2019)
#22Re: It’s time to let the five stages of grief die (2019)
#23My strategy:
I know I'm going to get over this eventually. I might as well start now.
It helps that I have aphantasia and a very poor autobiographical memory.
Re: It’s time to let the five stages of grief die (2019)
#24As with K&R's C, K-R's grieving model will likely prove a resilient beast.
Re: It’s time to let the five stages of grief die (2019)
#25> The five stages of grief are ingrained in our cultural consciousness as the natural progression of emotions one experiences after the death of a loved one. However, it turns out that this model is not science-based, does not well describe most people's experiences, and was never even meant to apply to the bereaved. I find it applies perfectly to what I see happening in all kind of personal grief (for others and for…
The problem is that this is not even a rough matching what people feel.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/supersurvivors/20170...
"In fact, the actual grief process looks a lot less like a neat set of stages and a lot more like a roller coaster of emotions. Even Kubler-Ross said that grief doesn’t proceed in a linear and predictable fashion, writing toward the end of her career that she regretted her stages had been misunderstood."
Re: It’s time to let the five stages of grief die (2019)
#26"Not everyone experiences grief in the same way"
What an insight! Its a model, with all that that implies.
Re: It’s time to let the five stages of grief die (2019)
#27I always considered this more of a rule of thumb sort of like "when you throw a rock, first it goes up then it goes down"* rather than an exact equation. Like there are different reactions to something bad, they will not always all be present, and the order is not a given, and sometimes they are adaptive (the thing you are denying may in fact not be true, anger may prevent it etc).
* Not just imprecise but even has exceptions. What if you throw it straight down? What if you throw it straight down, and it bounces? What if it achieves escape velocity? What if you throw it down at an angle and it then achieves escape velocity?
Re: It’s time to let the five stages of grief die (2019)
#28No, I’m sure that can’t be right - the stages of grief are so well known they must be true. I mean, c’mon - have books and films just been lying to me all this time?! But maybe it’s not completely wrong - there must be a core of truth to it if it resonates so well. Maybe we can preserve that even if we don’t stick to the specific stages. But how could I have been fooled by this for so long? What’s wrong with me that…
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Re: It’s time to let the five stages of grief die (2019)
#29No, I’m sure that can’t be right - the stages of grief are so well known they must be true. I mean, c’mon - have books and films just been lying to me all this time?! But maybe it’s not completely wrong - there must be a core of truth to it if it resonates so well. Maybe we can preserve that even if we don’t stick to the specific stages. But how could I have been fooled by this for so long? What’s wrong with me that…
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Re: It’s time to let the five stages of grief die (2019)
#30No, I’m sure that can’t be right - the stages of grief are so well known they must be true. I mean, c’mon - have books and films just been lying to me all this time?! But maybe it’s not completely wrong - there must be a core of truth to it if it resonates so well. Maybe we can preserve that even if we don’t stick to the specific stages. But how could I have been fooled by this for so long? What’s wrong with me that…
Could it be that the fact that the stages are "known" makes for a bleak perspective for whoever is going through them, without a sense of escape from it, and that makes it so that people prefer to attack this perspective in a sense of hoping for these steps to be actually wrong/not true? This to me seems more of a "nah please tell me another story that doesn't make me feel so bad", which I can also understand to a de…
Sure. Horoscopes "work" that way, too.