Frame Control • Hacker News Board

Re: Frame Control

#21

Post by GavinMcG » Fri, Dec 03, 2021, 1:46 AM UTC

errantmind wrote: post #2

This appears to be an example of weaponized generalization. The examples of what frame control looks like and doesn't look like are broad to the point of meaning anything you want them to mean, OR, lack any sense of boundaries. The author says everyone exercises frame control all the time, including themselves, and doesn't know what to do about it. In another sentence says their reaction when encountering it is to 'b…

"Weaponized" is an interesting choice of framing. What if the article is just run-of-the-mill wrong to generalize?

Re: Frame Control

#22

Post by scott0129 » Fri, Dec 03, 2021, 8:51 AM UTC

pedalpete wrote: post #9

rglover wrote: post #7

Have an NPD dad and this rings a lot of bells. In addition to what's written here, it's helpful to study that disorder to better navigate the idea of frame control (NPDs carefully tailor reality in this way). A good starting point is Dr. Les Carter on YouTube if you're unfamiliar with the disorder.

Yeah, I felt exactly the same way. The intro made me go "oh wow, there are other people with that experience too". I kept reading, but decided I needed to stop and come back to it later when I'm in a different frame of mind. This could spin me out for the day.

I felt similarly. Half way through the post, I couldn't help but just feel... bad. She was right, it's ultimately just her thoughts but reading it felt deeply dangerous in my gut and I strongly considered stopping half way through. But I also felt it would be worse to just walk away with just the "dangerous" half of the story, and that I should finish reading.

I'm glad that I read through to the end, if only for the last few sentences - and a part of me wishes they came sooner in the post. It was a reassuring for me to read and I hope it is for you as well, something for you hold on to if you do decide to revisit the post:

> Don’t let this post tell you how you should feel. Take this article lightly, take it as a pointer, take it as art. Ultimately, checking in with how you actually feel is the answer. I don’t mean to imply this is easy; it’s often really hard to know how you feel, and maybe it changes often and frame controllers put in a lot of effort to obfuscate this. But in the end, careful attention to your own sensations are your saving grace.

Re: Frame Control

#23

Post by scott0129 » Fri, Dec 03, 2021, 9:47 AM UTC

I find it a bit upsetting that in true HackerNews character, so many comment just to express that the author's thoughts are naíve, unfounded, or just plain wrong.

This is what I got from her writing:

1. She hates this because it's scarred her and loved ones. 2. This is invisible though. I think radiation is an apt analogy. It's everywhere all the time, but rarely enough to do damage. 3. But it can hurt you and she has seen the scars. 4. It's very possible that you've never seen it's effects and never will.

And I struggle to see how to disagree with these points. A significant portion of her post is admitting that her description will not be a perfect one.

I feel she openly acknowledges that she could be wrong. And I also feel it would only be courteous for us, the readers, to acknowledge she could just be right.