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I deleted my social media accounts

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Re: I deleted my social media accounts

#191

Post by esafak »

xyzzy4747 wrote: post #123
walrus01 wrote: post #30

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That's not all FB is doing. https://www.nbcnews.com/tech/social-media/meta-new-hate-spee... "Meta will allow its billions of social media users to accuse people of being mentally ill based on their sexuality or gender identity, among broader changes it made to its moderation policies and practices Tuesday. ... The long list of changes to the new hate speech guidelines include removing rules that forbid insults about…

>accuse people of being mentally ill based on their sexuality or gender identity But the question is, are trans people actually mentally ill objectively? It certainly doesn't help them reproduce (a form of survival) from a biological perspective, for example. This Johns Hopkins professor thinks it's mental illness: https://www.boarddocs.com/vsba/scpsva/Board.nsf/files/B8UR4X...

The author's study is controversial. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paul_R._McHugh

Re: I deleted my social media accounts

#192

Post by chasebank »

insane_dreamer wrote: post #180
dehrmann wrote: post #175

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It went weirdly assumed that HN is somehow different. I don't believe in social media addiction, but addicts are known for lying to themselves and making excuses. If you're quitting social media because you don't think it's healthy, you need to look at any social media you're still on really closely.

There are several key things that make HN different: - no followers / following (no incentive to increase engagement) - no notifications of responses to comments (maybe there's a way to do this with RSS but at least it's not obvious) - no ads - no endless feed HN is much more like an RSS feed of interesting articles, where people can leave comments -- there is some back and forth (as in this case) but not a lot; it's…

No ads? The majority of hn submissions are ads! Comments too.

Re: I deleted my social media accounts

#193

Post by jader201 »

nindalf wrote: post #38

This advice to quit social media is always a hit on HN. When I was 10 years younger I read the same thing on HN, was thoroughly convinced and quit social media. I even followed the advice of trying to stay in touch by email. Sure. Turns out that a lot of people I knew posted huge life updates that I completely missed out on. I asked them why they didn’t tell me and they were confused. They said the posted it on socia…

> I know a lack of social media meant that I have lost touch with old acquaintances completely

I think that’s a feature, not a bug.

Most of the life updates people post on social media are the best of the best, which is what triggers so much fomo and trying to measure up. That’s why social media makes most people feel worse about their own lives. (Not to mention all of the other garbage these platforms try to push on you that you didn’t even ask for.)

If these people are really important to us, then we’d find other means of staying in touch: text them, call them, invite them over (if that’s feasible).

And if enough people get off social media, everyone else might also realize they need to make an effort to stay in touch with others, instead of the lazy post of glamour shots for the purpose of internet likes and feeding the dopamine addiction.

Re: I deleted my social media accounts

#194

Post by plutoh28 »

afavour wrote: post #167
jjulius wrote: post #133

Earlier quoted context omitted.

My hot take, offered respectfully: The companies attempting to get you hooked on their products have succeeded via the auspices of "FOMO".

I don’t buy that I’m being tricked into caring about the relationship I maintain with friends.

The FOMO is to get you to download the app, make an account, and deter you from uninstalling.

The real game is to keep you on the platform when you compulsively open it. You go in to check in on your second cousins, you stay to scroll through their TikTok clone or whatever attention harvesting algorithm is trendy currently.

Re: I deleted my social media accounts

#195

Post by WhyOhWhyQ »

nindalf wrote: post #38

This advice to quit social media is always a hit on HN. When I was 10 years younger I read the same thing on HN, was thoroughly convinced and quit social media. I even followed the advice of trying to stay in touch by email. Sure. Turns out that a lot of people I knew posted huge life updates that I completely missed out on. I asked them why they didn’t tell me and they were confused. They said the posted it on socia…

I quit social media 12 years ago and it's been an amazing boost to my personal psychology and productivity. My life is 10x better without it. I've forgotten many acquaintances and gained many more, and forgotten them again. Life is like that, but the core group of people is there, and I'm happy with that.

Re: I deleted my social media accounts

#196

Post by __MatrixMan__ »

nindalf wrote: post #38

This advice to quit social media is always a hit on HN. When I was 10 years younger I read the same thing on HN, was thoroughly convinced and quit social media. I even followed the advice of trying to stay in touch by email. Sure. Turns out that a lot of people I knew posted huge life updates that I completely missed out on. I asked them why they didn’t tell me and they were confused. They said the posted it on socia…

I did the same thing. Now all I have is github, stackoverflow, and HN. I end up missing out on all sorts of things that I'd like to have been along for. I'm not about to go back, I think that being at the business end of somebody's propaganda machine was even worse for me, but it's still a significant sacrifice.

Which is why I don't think the way forward is for everybody to leave social media. It's just not going to happen en masse, that's asking too much. We need to build media which can't be owned. If we ask people to sacrifice something, it should be an extra few cents on their electric bill and yesteryear's phone plugged in somewhere and hosting their share of it.

I've only been exploring it for a few days now, but nostr seems promising for this kind of thing. The content is awful, just coin bro stuff, but as something to plug into and build apps for... seems legit.

Re: I deleted my social media accounts

#197

Post by jmspring »

nindalf wrote: post #38

This advice to quit social media is always a hit on HN. When I was 10 years younger I read the same thing on HN, was thoroughly convinced and quit social media. I even followed the advice of trying to stay in touch by email. Sure. Turns out that a lot of people I knew posted huge life updates that I completely missed out on. I asked them why they didn’t tell me and they were confused. They said the posted it on socia…

It’s funny, a few groups I belong to solely use FB. One group is for the preservation of weatern history and a friend digitizes and uploads thousands of pictures (if not 10s of rhoughsands) yearly. The only actual digital copies are on FB. It bugs me that he won’t archive elsewhere. The reason is fb is a commons and an additional backup would be a magnitude more work. I’ve offered to buy hard drives.

Re: I deleted my social media accounts

#198

Post by nradov »

jmspring wrote: post #197
nindalf wrote: post #38

This advice to quit social media is always a hit on HN. When I was 10 years younger I read the same thing on HN, was thoroughly convinced and quit social media. I even followed the advice of trying to stay in touch by email. Sure. Turns out that a lot of people I knew posted huge life updates that I completely missed out on. I asked them why they didn’t tell me and they were confused. They said the posted it on socia…

It’s funny, a few groups I belong to solely use FB. One group is for the preservation of weatern history and a friend digitizes and uploads thousands of pictures (if not 10s of rhoughsands) yearly. The only actual digital copies are on FB. It bugs me that he won’t archive elsewhere. The reason is fb is a commons and an additional backup would be a magnitude more work. I’ve offered to buy hard drives.

You can download the pictures and archive them yourself.

Re: I deleted my social media accounts

#199

Post by plutoh28 »

Yeah social media has gotten very predatory, especially since short form content blew up due to TikTok. I’ll have chats with people that are just an exchange of instagram reels and reactions.

HN is my only form of social media now on my phone. Now, it’s time to build meaningful relationships in my life again.

Re: I deleted my social media accounts

#200

Post by nradov »

jader201 wrote: post #193
nindalf wrote: post #38

This advice to quit social media is always a hit on HN. When I was 10 years younger I read the same thing on HN, was thoroughly convinced and quit social media. I even followed the advice of trying to stay in touch by email. Sure. Turns out that a lot of people I knew posted huge life updates that I completely missed out on. I asked them why they didn’t tell me and they were confused. They said the posted it on socia…

> I know a lack of social media meant that I have lost touch with old acquaintances completely I think that’s a feature, not a bug. Most of the life updates people post on social media are the best of the best, which is what triggers so much fomo and trying to measure up. That’s why social media makes most people feel worse about their own lives. (Not to mention all of the other garbage these platforms try to push on…

I don't know about other people but social media doesn't make me feel worse about my life. There's no fomo when my 2nd cousin in another state posts about having a baby. She's important to me, and I don't expect her to waste time emailing me directly when the rest of the extended family is all on social media.
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