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The Psychological Trap of Freelancing

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Re: The Psychological Trap of Freelancing

#191
The best way to freelance that I know of for stability, low stress, and freedom is to get a regular ~10 hour a week gig doing remote contract development. Change $100/hr+. No hustling really required after you find them since in my experience they want you to stay on for the long haul.

There are a lot of very small companies with less than 10 people in them quietly making good money that have a software system that doesn't need a full time developer. Or, because they can't afford a large team, are willing to hire a few developers part time to reduce the risk of one single person being the sole linchpin for the entire business.

I see a lot of people around here asking "How do I get more clients?" In the course of 8 years of freelancing, I've only had around 10 clients total because most of them have been in an arrangement like this, and they stay for a long time. I've often been the one to end the relationship for it not being a good fit for me, not them running out of money or firing me. They don't come very often, but when they do, they usually stick.

If I had to do the Upwork hustle, I'd have probably quit a long time ago. This seems to not be as true for other professions like design/copywriting/music/etc, but full time salaried development just pays too well to be a freelancer unless you want freedom. Otherwise it's just crappy employment with fewer benefits.

For a good number of years I lived in rural Indiana and worked 10 hours a week for one client at $90/hr and made plenty to live on for just myself. Now I'm working to earn more than that, but with this model it's often a matter of scaling up or down the number of clients you have.

Freelancing gives you the ability to work less than 40 hours a week, which gives you leverage over your time to create the life for yourself that you want. It's stupidly hard to start a SaaS app with a full time job, but freelancing can sustain you on 20 hours a week and then the rest of the time can be spend doing whatever you want (just work less, start a business without stress, travel, etc).

Re: The Psychological Trap of Freelancing

#192

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> being unable to get out of that mindset doesn't make her a shitty spouse This is an incredibly helpful reminder that people should not be reduced to their flaws and relationships are not the mere sum of their drawbacks. Because people are risk-averse, it's easy to focus on what's bad and take for granted what's good. So when a relationship becomes challenging, people can reflexively give up (or throw away) rather t…

Indeed they are... though in this particular case there were a bunch of other factors that caused this particular relationship to fail, but even with those considered, they don't make her a shitty person, she is more than the sum of her parts. Just because the relationship was unworkable, doesn't make her a bad person or even a bad spouse, they just make us bad partners to one another.

I have the highest respect for people like you who can make comments like these. It takes a lot of maturity and mental creativity to see things from others' perspectives, and if everyone had your mindset the world would be a better place. If you are ever in Chicago I'd love to buy you a coffee/beer and hear your story.

Re: The Psychological Trap of Freelancing

#194

My sanity and income both improved remarkably once I stopped trading hours for money. Now I trade results for money. This gives me a lot of control over how I work. The client only cares about the result - X% increase in website traffic, X new leads, etc. As long as I make that happen, it doesn't matter to the client whether I work 5 hours or 50. I'm often done with my month's work in about 10-15 days and have enough…

How do you bring up the topic & structure rates? EG, if you get 80% of the way towards that 5% goal, What about 120%? etc.

How do you price based on results like this without a clear internal view of the company's numbers. Feels like it would be throwing darts somewhat.

Re: The Psychological Trap of Freelancing

#195

"I went outside to get coffee and ran into three different neighbors who wanted to chit-chat. I wanted to scream, ‘For every word that comes out of your mouth, I’m losing money!" This is a statement from someone who either hasn't been freelancing that long, or who hasn't realized that "brain down time" is just as important as raw coding hours. I've worked "for myself" for almost 20 years and for the first 5 I too pan…

> I wanted to scream

Why not just say something along the lines of, "Sorry, I work from home and I'm on the clock but just popping out for a cup of coffee - chat later.", with a smile? It's much better for your mental constitution than holding in a scream.

Re: The Psychological Trap of Freelancing

#196

"I went outside to get coffee and ran into three different neighbors who wanted to chit-chat. I wanted to scream, ‘For every word that comes out of your mouth, I’m losing money!" This is a statement from someone who either hasn't been freelancing that long, or who hasn't realized that "brain down time" is just as important as raw coding hours. I've worked "for myself" for almost 20 years and for the first 5 I too pan…

The biggest problem for me was my (ex)spouse always pushing for billable hours. Every time I decided I wanted time off there was a constant nagging reminder and guilt of not only what it would cost to go and do what I want - for example cost of flights, accommodation, entertainment and food, but also the cost of the loss of income for that time off meaning that every time I was away from my keyboard it was costing me…

Sounds like you got cucked due to youth and naivety. Looks like you learned your lesson. Remember, it's your work, not hers.

Re: The Psychological Trap of Freelancing

#197
post #107

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> I went from hourly, to per project, to weekly billings I have tried all three, read all the HN favourites on why value pricing is the way; tried charging for roadmapping; and yet I come back to the most stressful of day-rate (hourly by any other name), unable to break this in 15 years of technical consulting. Why? Because with per project billing I was losing 30-50% as client expectations were different to mine. Wh…

> It feels like I am missing something obvious I'm not sure if you're missing something obvious ..this is HARD, I totally know what you're feeling like. I was talking with a buddy other day ago (also a consultant); I was grumbling about how clients have "urgent" projects and then proceed to sit on the project proposal for a few weeks... His response went something like this: "look, there are reason's why consultants…

Ah, yes, the "hurry up and wait!" projects. If it makes you feel better, my 9-5 for the man is full of them too. Working all weekend to come in on Monday and find out it was all in vein is no fun.

Re: The Psychological Trap of Freelancing

#198
post #90

"I went outside to get coffee and ran into three different neighbors who wanted to chit-chat. I wanted to scream, ‘For every word that comes out of your mouth, I’m losing money!" This is a statement from someone who either hasn't been freelancing that long, or who hasn't realized that "brain down time" is just as important as raw coding hours. I've worked "for myself" for almost 20 years and for the first 5 I too pan…

The problem though is how do you bill clients? If you're "working" and surfing HN you could possibly bill that, but walking around talking to neighbours doesn't cut it.

What's the difference? Billing for any of these seem equally dishonest.

Re: The Psychological Trap of Freelancing

#199
post #163

Earlier quoted context omitted.

One of my clients said the other day: "When working with a fixed fee there's always 1 party that 'loses'". I tend to agree, either it ends up more work than expected (freelancer loses), or (although in your experience that's less common) the freelancer learned from previous mistakes and overcharges. In addition, the upfront cost of specifying the job is also lost. This is not always trivial to 0do upfront, as both th…

The biggest thing is that flat rate doesn’t do is anticipate risk. If through nobody’s ill intent a task takes 5x longer or 5x less, it’s all swallowed up by the flat rate. That’s a feature for a productized service. It also works for well-scoped tasks. I wouldn’t pay someone by the hour to cut the grass.

[deleted]

Re: The Psychological Trap of Freelancing

#200
post #163

Earlier quoted context omitted.

One of my clients said the other day: "When working with a fixed fee there's always 1 party that 'loses'". I tend to agree, either it ends up more work than expected (freelancer loses), or (although in your experience that's less common) the freelancer learned from previous mistakes and overcharges. In addition, the upfront cost of specifying the job is also lost. This is not always trivial to 0do upfront, as both th…

The biggest thing is that flat rate doesn’t do is anticipate risk. If through nobody’s ill intent a task takes 5x longer or 5x less, it’s all swallowed up by the flat rate. That’s a feature for a productized service. It also works for well-scoped tasks. I wouldn’t pay someone by the hour to cut the grass.

On assumes that there is always room for additional services. And unforeseen conditions.
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