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What Would You Recommend to a Bright 14 Year Old?

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Re: What Would You Recommend to a Bright 14 Year Old?

#181

Post by sliverstorm »

evanwolf wrote: post #176

The humanities and body stuff get short shrift. And they have the highest impact when you inhale them young. So take up meditation. Make dancing something you do often. Hack things with your hands. Sing. Sing while bicycling. Play the harmonica with soul. Perform your poetry to others. Hug, kiss, and shake hands with enthusiasm. Find people that make you uncomfortable and talk with them. Learn a non-european language…

This is exactly the sort of things I would say, if I could send younger me a note. Broaden your horizons, self.

Academically, professionally, it's all worked out fine- just do what you do, me-of-the-past.

But I would that I had invested a bit more effort into music, culture, arts- and a lot more effort into health & exercise. I basically wrote off physical fitness, which was a huge mistake.

FWIW I'm not the rotund sort, in fact the opposite, skinny as a bean pole in school and it developed a lot of bad habits that I am still correcting and hurt my overall performance & success (being terribly underweight dulls the mind...) I really should have developed a bit more cardio & a lot more muscle.

Re: What Would You Recommend to a Bright 14 Year Old?

#182

Post by sliverstorm »

karmacondon wrote: post #169

If I could talk to my 14 year old self, I wouldn't recommend any particular books. I would say, "Don't stress and worry so much about school or your grades, because absolutely none of that is going to matter in 10 years. Learn how to make things. Start now, and never stop. Learn how to use technology to the fullest, both software and hardware. Learn how to write, speak and communicate ideas as effectively as possible…

Most importantly, don't let anyone change who you are. Choose a path and follow it doggedly

I've never really gotten this. It's a popular message- you, child, are completely perfect the way you are. Never change, not one iota.

Personally I think it's ridiculous. Life is a journey of self-improvement, and you cannot, all by yourself, craft yourself into the best you can be.

The man who views the world at 50 the same as he did at 20 has wasted 30 years of his life. -- Muhammad Ali

Re: What Would You Recommend to a Bright 14 Year Old?

#183

Post by scoggs »

ableal wrote: post #130
gorkemyurt wrote: post #63

- play sports - have as many friends as you can, girlfriends/boyfriends, don't be shy, drink beer before its legal most importantly have self discipline. If you manage to have self discipline everything else is easy in life

"This", as they say. Bright 14 year olds manage to read too many books. They need to get out, make friends, make things - especially learn to finish things. They need the tortoise and hare fable pounded in by practice. (As you probably heard before: King Crimson, Discipline: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_-dZNzXylVE )

Yes! I think being well rounded is extremely important as all kinds of activities can be stimulating and teach you a wealth about yourself and other people. Be it socially or life skills, dating or networking, everything tends to crop up later in life some way or some how and the more well rounded you are as an individual the better you will be prepared to succeed.

Making great companies, products, and decisions can sometimes play into non-technical things, non-computer things. In those cases it's really important to have that "outside" / "neighborhood" background that teaches you the ropes of life without a book.

Re: What Would You Recommend to a Bright 14 Year Old?

#184

Post by angersock »

NhanH wrote: post #177
angersock wrote: post #175

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It's worked for tens of thousands of years, so I think it's a reasonable goal. If somebody's goal is to understand sexuality, they should be out interacting with other people instead of reading books.

Actually, unless I'm severely mistaken, most people managed the get laid over the last tens of thousands of years, but they're mostly terrible at understanding human and relationships. I've seen too many relatives, elders and generally people around me making one too many mistakes -- some even seems to do everything wrong. And I'm rather scared of that. "Getting laid" is definitely a skill by itself, but I disagree w…

I generally wouldn't suggest learning about sexuality first-hand from ones relatives. :|

So, once upon a time I too was very much concerned about making one too many mistakes--part of learning is figuring out that those mistakes are a)somewhat expected of you as a maturing sexual entity and b)harmless.

As long as you treat other people with respect and try to be a good person, your romantic screwups (and you will have romantic screwups) will just be slightly stressful learning experiences.

One thing that I've noticed is that it seems modern intellectual and enlightened internet culture is the worst possible place to discover and explore your own sexuality.

Abnormal urges are treated as standard, and normal urges are treated as discriminatory, barbaric, unseemly, or criminal. Go interact with normal people at bars or coffee shops or social events and see what you can see--it is going to be very hard to find positive role models online in the places you'd normally expect wise elders.

Hell, you're honestly better off looking through 4chan than you are any of the conservative, progressive, or technical sites here.

Re: What Would You Recommend to a Bright 14 Year Old?

#185

Post by angersock »

meric wrote: post #180
NhanH wrote: post #177

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Actually, unless I'm severely mistaken, most people managed the get laid over the last tens of thousands of years, but they're mostly terrible at understanding human and relationships. I've seen too many relatives, elders and generally people around me making one too many mistakes -- some even seems to do everything wrong. And I'm rather scared of that. "Getting laid" is definitely a skill by itself, but I disagree w…

angersock mentioned sexuality specifically rather than non-sexual relationships. Getting laid doesn't help as much with non-sexual relationships and it doesn't help as much with non-sexual aspect of human beings. For those, I still agree with the advice they should be out interacting with other people instead of reading books , which means interacting with relatives, elders and generally people around you .

Bingo--author mentioned sexuality, which is something that is specifically best left to fieldwork instead of reading Wikipedia and books...and yes, I'm speaking from experience.

Talking to people at parties and raves and orgies and meetups is going to give you much better experience and understanding.

And as for the non-sexual relationship stuff, I'll attempt no general claims at this time.

Re: What Would You Recommend to a Bright 14 Year Old?

#187

Post by draven »

sliverstorm wrote: post #182
karmacondon wrote: post #169

If I could talk to my 14 year old self, I wouldn't recommend any particular books. I would say, "Don't stress and worry so much about school or your grades, because absolutely none of that is going to matter in 10 years. Learn how to make things. Start now, and never stop. Learn how to use technology to the fullest, both software and hardware. Learn how to write, speak and communicate ideas as effectively as possible…

Most importantly, don't let anyone change who you are. Choose a path and follow it doggedly I've never really gotten this. It's a popular message- you, child, are completely perfect the way you are. Never change, not one iota. Personally I think it's ridiculous. Life is a journey of self-improvement, and you cannot, all by yourself, craft yourself into the best you can be. The man who views the world at 50 the same a…

That's not the way I understand it. For me it means not allowing others to coerce you into being someone you're not and making conscious decisions about where you're going and who you're going to be.

And yes, "you're perfect, don't change" is a recipe for stagnation, a child should not be told this (if (s)he's perfect, why would (s)he learn anything new or work towards something?)

Re: What Would You Recommend to a Bright 14 Year Old?

#188

Post by jsprogrammer »

sliverstorm wrote: post #182
karmacondon wrote: post #169

If I could talk to my 14 year old self, I wouldn't recommend any particular books. I would say, "Don't stress and worry so much about school or your grades, because absolutely none of that is going to matter in 10 years. Learn how to make things. Start now, and never stop. Learn how to use technology to the fullest, both software and hardware. Learn how to write, speak and communicate ideas as effectively as possible…

Most importantly, don't let anyone change who you are. Choose a path and follow it doggedly I've never really gotten this. It's a popular message- you, child, are completely perfect the way you are. Never change, not one iota. Personally I think it's ridiculous. Life is a journey of self-improvement, and you cannot, all by yourself, craft yourself into the best you can be. The man who views the world at 50 the same a…

It's particularly strange given that just prior to saying that, the person advocated learning how to 'hack' other people and to seemed to indicate that you should manipulate social structures.

Re: What Would You Recommend to a Bright 14 Year Old?

#189

Post by sukilot »

viewer5 wrote: post #31
cgh wrote: post #28

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I've never read "The Adapted Mind" but the first two are exactly my recommendations. GEB in particular was life-altering for me. I read it twice in high school and several times since. Growing up in a small town, it really opened my eyes to a larger world somehow and initiated a real craving for knowledge. Oddly enough, learning 6502 assembly had the same effect at the same age.

What's so significant about GEB? I bought it on recommendation from a friend, but haven't gotten that far in my reading queue yet.

Hoftstadter struggles with deep metaphysical questions, which will never have satisfying answers. But there is a unique art to his exploration. The problem is that if you read it when you are young, you think there are answers in the book,when really there are only musings.

Re: What Would You Recommend to a Bright 14 Year Old?

#190

Post by nickysielicki »

seanlinehan wrote: post #33

I would definitely recommend How to Win Friends and Influence People as an addition to the list. I'd say that learning how to deal with people and communicate ideas effectively is at least as important as learning how to think. This is also a book I recommend reading, re-reading, and then re-reading again for people of all ages. Edit: I'd also probably recommend Innumeracy[0] which is a fun book about dealing with nu…

fwiw, i read this when I was around 14. It was mostly lost on me.

It's a fantastic book, and I can appreciate that now, but I feel personally I wasn't ready for it. I needed to develop a sense of empathy.

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