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Did they ghost you?

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Re: Did they ghost you?

#181

Post by bigiain »

skypivot wrote: post #180
bigiain wrote: post #160

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It's always worth considering whether you have people who will give you genuine glowing references. I've only ever once been at a place where there was a policy saying "all you are allowed to say during reference checks is "yes, they worked here as [job title], from {month/year} to {month/year}". And even with that policy/restriction I still found ways to be much much more positive about the people who were genuinely…

Congratulations, you cost her the job because the company didn't want to deal with an increased risk of her being poached. She's suing, by the way.

Nah, she got the job. And that lead to her next even better one. Now I'd need something to go spectacularly right for me to be able to afford to head hunt her.

(We still catch up for coffee every 6 or 12 months.)

Re: Did they ghost you?

#182

Post by close04 »

chrysoprace wrote: post #170
ipaddr wrote: post #126

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It's usually last manager and co-workers where the company has a policy of not allowing references. Plus who wants to bother other people asking for a reference after you've been working for 25 years.

I have never heard of not allowing references. Is that a US thing? While I don't love providing references, given they are such a standard part of the employment process (at least here in Australia), I can't see how a company could disallow providing character references. That would be a big red flag if I discovered that after starting to work somewhere.

Happens in Europe too. I think it’s a liability issue, not allowing the employee to speak in the name of the company. So the guidance is “tell the reference seeker to contact the HR department” and they’ll eventually reply that “this person worked here as between ”.

Re: Did they ghost you?

#183

Post by voidnap »

NikolaNovak wrote: post #152
sccvcxv wrote: post #70

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It should be illegal to ask for references - the purpose of the interview is to understand your capabilities and abilities. If they couldn't suss all about you in that process then they have a shitty interview process.

It's a data point, not a final or primary determinant. Vast majority of corporate team members or leads are not allowed to say anything bad or much other than whether that person was employed or not. Nevertheless : 1. If a person has a comprehensive long resume but cannot provide meaningful references, that poses a significant question as to why 2. A person will not typically say anything bad about their ex colleague…

It kinda sucks though if you end up being a bad culture fit a couple times in a row. You end up being rejected on that basis alone. Forever. And there is nothing you can do about it, even of you are qualified for the jobs you apply for.

Re: Did they ghost you?

#186

Post by poulpy123 »

fourseventy wrote: post #103
ButlerianJihad wrote: post #36

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I have participated in at least 3 rounds of vocational rehabilitation, and one of the major takeaways was writing thank-you notes after any interview. A note could be a card or an email, but a thank-you note simply expresses gratitude for the interviewer’s time and attention. And moreover, a followup will keep your name in their mind, for better or worse. Following up after the interview series may have been the tric…

I was recently interviewing candidates for a senior software engineer in Boston. I did about 20 interviews and only got 1 follow up/thank you email. I didn't send rejection emails to candidates that didn't send a follow up.

You should consult for your god complex

Re: Did they ghost you?

#187

Post by lkramer »

paulcole wrote: post #156
chrismarlow9 wrote: post #100

Ghosted by Apple here. Devops or SRE job for services teams if I'm remembering right. Did a months worth of rounds. Was told the offer letter would be coming within the next week. Turned down other companies on the gamble that it was actually coming. Never came. Pinged recruiter and finally after a month was told they stopped hiring and would reach back out in a few months when it started back. Never happened. That w…

You can just take the other offer while you wait and then quit when the one you really want comes in.

I did that, and had to take a bollocking from the HR guy at the company I took the first offer from, but I don't regret it.

Re: Did they ghost you?

#188

Post by thaumasiotes »

slowerturnip wrote: post #40
ButlerianJihad wrote: post #36

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I have participated in at least 3 rounds of vocational rehabilitation, and one of the major takeaways was writing thank-you notes after any interview. A note could be a card or an email, but a thank-you note simply expresses gratitude for the interviewer’s time and attention. And moreover, a followup will keep your name in their mind, for better or worse. Following up after the interview series may have been the tric…

I hear this advice given quite a bit, but another perspective: I have never been pleased to receive a thank you email from a candidate. I do not want to receive something in my inbox that does not require me to act. It's a micro-annoyance, and if it's a bad day, I might have grumpy thoughts about the candidate being a brownnoser. Show up to the interview clothed, be pleasant and polite, show off your game, and leave…

At NCC Group I once heard someone with hiring authority complain that an applicant had looked good, but never sent a thank you note for their interview. "What kind of person would do that?"

Re: Did they ghost you?

#189

Post by lelanthran »

NikolaNovak wrote: post #154
preg_match wrote: post #137

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The big issue is that a lot of companies don’t allow asking their employees for references. Many even require references for their own hiring process (!!!)

Can you elaborate? Many companies don't allow details, but are allowed to confirm a person was employed in a specific role. That's in many cases a sufficient to serve as a reference. E.g. In my company we have a very strict policy for this, but are still allowed to answer "yes, Bob was employed as problem manager team lead from 2023 to 2025". Conversely as a hiring manager, I'll take that as a minimally sufficient da…

> Many companies don't allow details, but are allowed to confirm a person was employed in a specific role.

WDYM by "allowed"? In my jurisdiction, a company is required to confirm (or deny, as the case may be) the dates and roles of employment when asked.

A reply along the lines of "we can not confirm $PERSON's employment as a $ROLE between $DATE1 and $DATE2" when $PERSON has salary slips for those dates is a slam-dunk winning lawsuit!

Re: Did they ghost you?

#190

Post by chrysoprace »

close04 wrote: post #182
chrysoprace wrote: post #170

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I have never heard of not allowing references. Is that a US thing? While I don't love providing references, given they are such a standard part of the employment process (at least here in Australia), I can't see how a company could disallow providing character references. That would be a big red flag if I discovered that after starting to work somewhere.

Happens in Europe too. I think it’s a liability issue, not allowing the employee to speak in the name of the company. So the guidance is “tell the reference seeker to contact the HR department” and they’ll eventually reply that “this person worked here as between ”.

That makes more sense. That's still a reference I guess. I was more confused about straight up denying somebody a reference, that would immediately make tenure at a company worth less.
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