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Procrastination is connected to perfectionism

solvingprocrastination.com

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Re: Procrastination is connected to perfectionism

#181

Post by kaba0 »

nradov wrote: post #148
Aurornis wrote: post #86

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> The easiest antidote for procrastination is boredom. From my experience with young people, the worst procrastinators will often choose boredom over the task they're avoiding. Doing nothing at all is less painful to them than doing the work they're avoiding. This is even more true for the perfectionist procrastinators: They are avoiding some exaggerated hypothetical pain that might come from failing at a task. If th…

My daughter would literally sit and stare at the wall instead of doing her English class homework.

I guess the alternative has to be mentally stimulating for it to work. Maybe she finds it too easy or meaningless?

Re: Procrastination is connected to perfectionism

#182

Post by tweetle_beetle »

ethbr1 wrote: post #154
Teever wrote: post #152

Earlier quoted context omitted.

These are possibilities but I think you missed a much more likely one -- they're just bullies who like to pick on people.

If they were just bullies, then there shouldn't be a preference for hypothetical UI and architecture folks.

Even bullies can be lazy in their metier - it's quicker and easier to find a tangible target for abuse in a finished product, and, perhaps more importantly, it doesn't risk an ego brusing when a critique of an abstract proves to be incorrect.

I've certainly seen my fair share of these types - too busy (ie. lazy) to really get stuck into detail during a project even when invited to do so, but very quick to point out an issue after a few minutes of expressly looking for one when it's too late.

They seem to see it as demonstrating their experience and superiority over others ie. "I only need a few minutes to find an issue". In my experiences, they also tend to insist on saying "everything needs to go through me", but never make time to follow through - out of laziness. This gives a high ROI on effort expended to stress created.

The best times I had with these people (when I was beyond caring) was laying low and doing launches semi covertly, so that there was time for clients to provide positive feedback and praise first. Then play dumb and deliver news about launch and feedback as a package.

Re: Procrastination is connected to perfectionism

#184

Post by wholinator2 »

29athrowaway wrote: post #126
Aurornis wrote: post #88

I developed a bad case of perfectionism-procrastination after working for a toxic boss. It didn't matter how polished our product was, he'd find a way to tear it apart. When he'd have a bad day, he'd start picking apart a random team's product. "Unbelievable!" he'd say in Slack, dropping a screen recording of the app that showed something we were supposed to be embarrassed about. It could be that the app took 3 secon…

1. Use a issue tracker to report issues. If a ticket doesn't exist, create it. 2. Stick to the facts: what happened, and what should have happened instead? Remove all the noise such as blame, emotional reactions, etc. Less drama, more clarity. 3. If the root cause is something dumb such as the hotel WiFi, close the ticket as "can't reproduce" and add an explanation. You can avoid reading the text, then use a LLM prom…

Hmm, that is an interesting idea. I bet someone could write an app that rephrased incoming messages through an LLM to match some metric you chose. You'd definitely need the ability to read the original message and there's about a million and a half ways out could go wrong but it's interesting nonetheless. Just evaporate toxicity from all communications before they even reach your brain.

Re: Procrastination is connected to perfectionism

#185

Post by CooCooCaCha »

Teever wrote: post #152
CooCooCaCha wrote: post #143

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You put into words something I've had a hard time understanding for a long time. Some people really do have a clear preference for people who don't ship. Out of curiosity, what kind of background did your toxic boss have? Is it technical or business side? I have a couple hunches for why this happens: 1. These people are dreamers and dislike people who bring them back down to reality, even if they need those people to…

These are possibilities but I think you missed a much more likely one -- they're just bullies who like to pick on people.

That falls under the "feeling superior" bucket. And like others have said it doesn't explain bias towards certain people.

Re: Procrastination is connected to perfectionism

#186

Post by sirsinsalot »

Procrastination can be related to perfectionism.

And chronic stress. And anxiety. And trauma. And clinical depression. And avoidant behaviour disorders linked to autism and ADHD.

can be. It is an important distinction, usually one lost on people selling something (be it a product, themselves, their ego)

Re: Procrastination is connected to perfectionism

#187

Post by zestyping »

wholinator2 wrote: post #184
29athrowaway wrote: post #126

Earlier quoted context omitted.

1. Use a issue tracker to report issues. If a ticket doesn't exist, create it. 2. Stick to the facts: what happened, and what should have happened instead? Remove all the noise such as blame, emotional reactions, etc. Less drama, more clarity. 3. If the root cause is something dumb such as the hotel WiFi, close the ticket as "can't reproduce" and add an explanation. You can avoid reading the text, then use a LLM prom…

Hmm, that is an interesting idea. I bet someone could write an app that rephrased incoming messages through an LLM to match some metric you chose. You'd definitely need the ability to read the original message and there's about a million and a half ways out could go wrong but it's interesting nonetheless. Just evaporate toxicity from all communications before they even reach your brain.

It seems like a good idea at first... but it also would mean everyone could communicate as toxically as they wanted with no consequences. Uh oh.

Re: Procrastination is connected to perfectionism

#188

Post by ahmedalsudani »

kthejoker2 wrote: post #100

I probably have a whole personal blog of my own on the topic, dear as it is to my soul. My two main pieces of advice: The bar is very very low, and share your burden quickly. 99 times out of 100 you are way overestimating the value of what you're delivering and people's expectations for it, and underestimating the value of time i.e. shipping quickly. I've turned in so many things I'm not happy with and gotten a "this…

This is one of my favourite things I've read on here, and it frames working on a team the way it should be framed!

Going to adopt every part of it. Thank you for sharing.

Re: Procrastination is connected to perfectionism

#189

Post by buckyfull »

Aurornis wrote: post #88

I developed a bad case of perfectionism-procrastination after working for a toxic boss. It didn't matter how polished our product was, he'd find a way to tear it apart. When he'd have a bad day, he'd start picking apart a random team's product. "Unbelievable!" he'd say in Slack, dropping a screen recording of the app that showed something we were supposed to be embarrassed about. It could be that the app took 3 secon…

Your boss displayed the opposite behaviors most all the creativity literature says are barriers to creative expression: close-mindedness, evaluation, etc - that is, creating environments that have no psychological safety where people don’t feel comfortable expressing their ideas. Wild that this boss was involved with product development and crazy how people like this come into positions of power and just ruin shit left and right.

Re: Procrastination is connected to perfectionism

#190

Post by 29athrowaway »

zestyping wrote: post #187
wholinator2 wrote: post #184

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Hmm, that is an interesting idea. I bet someone could write an app that rephrased incoming messages through an LLM to match some metric you chose. You'd definitely need the ability to read the original message and there's about a million and a half ways out could go wrong but it's interesting nonetheless. Just evaporate toxicity from all communications before they even reach your brain.

It seems like a good idea at first... but it also would mean everyone could communicate as toxically as they wanted with no consequences. Uh oh.

If you cross certain lines, toxic messages should be blocked and sent to HR for review.

Criticism is fine, when it is constructive and done with tact.

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