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The gap between how old you are and how old you think you are

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Re: The gap between how old you are and how old you think you are

#181

Post by xyzelement »

BobbyJo wrote: post #180
xyzelement wrote: post #93

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I am talking about responsibility as in being responsible for people (spouse, kids, grandkids in this case.) It's easier to "feel young" when you don't have that.

It's the "appropriate" that gives it the negative connotation. Maybe you meant "the responsibilities necessary to feel an age", but it came off as "the responsibilities you should have at an age".

Good clarification prompt, thank you.

I meant the former definition but they are intertwined for me so it makes sense that it came out ambiguously.

To elaborate:

As I grow up, I see in myself and others a deeper life satisfaction from being parents/grandparents at "the appropriate age." This was not obvious to me when I was 20-30.

So I don't mean for "appropriate" to suggest you owe it to anybody to reproduce, but I do believe that it's a path most likely to yield the most satisfaction for a typical person.

(As an analogy, I can say the "appropriate" weight for a 6 ft tall man like me is 170-180LBs. That doesn't mean that I am obligated to lose 20LBs, just that my life would be better if I did)

Re: The gap between how old you are and how old you think you are

#182

Post by yencabulator »

xyzelement wrote: post #181
BobbyJo wrote: post #180

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It's the "appropriate" that gives it the negative connotation. Maybe you meant "the responsibilities necessary to feel an age", but it came off as "the responsibilities you should have at an age".

Good clarification prompt, thank you. I meant the former definition but they are intertwined for me so it makes sense that it came out ambiguously. To elaborate: As I grow up, I see in myself and others a deeper life satisfaction from being parents/grandparents at "the appropriate age." This was not obvious to me when I was 20-30. So I don't mean for "appropriate" to suggest you owe it to anybody to reproduce, but I…

Yeah you still sound judgy, and assuming a typical person must agree with you.

Re: The gap between how old you are and how old you think you are

#183

Post by dehrmann »

RHSman2 wrote: post #167
dehrmann wrote: post #62

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> lower back hurt the next day "Next day" makes me think it's just DOMS.

My MRI on my hip and lower lumbar would tell you other wise.

Back MRIs are weird. You'll get people with herniated discs with no symptoms and people with clean MRIs in pain. And of course, people experiencing pain that the MRI finds the cause of. It's also possible to have two sources of pain. It could be DOMS plus a herniated disc.

I'm mostly pointing this out because "back pain" has scary connotations, any sort of pain gets them worried, even if it's just DOMS.

Re: The gap between how old you are and how old you think you are

#184

Post by xyzelement »

yencabulator wrote: post #182
xyzelement wrote: post #181

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Good clarification prompt, thank you. I meant the former definition but they are intertwined for me so it makes sense that it came out ambiguously. To elaborate: As I grow up, I see in myself and others a deeper life satisfaction from being parents/grandparents at "the appropriate age." This was not obvious to me when I was 20-30. So I don't mean for "appropriate" to suggest you owe it to anybody to reproduce, but I…

Yeah you still sound judgy, and assuming a typical person must agree with you.

I think I am OK with that.

In my book it's fine to have an opinion of what can be good for others, as long as I am clear that it's ultimately their life, their choice, and I don't have all the context anyway.

So I try to be honest about the patterns I see and opinions that I have (ie, "what would I do if that were me?") while being super open to being wrong.

Re: The gap between how old you are and how old you think you are

#185

Post by RHSman2 »

dehrmann wrote: post #183
RHSman2 wrote: post #167

Earlier quoted context omitted.

My MRI on my hip and lower lumbar would tell you other wise.

Back MRIs are weird. You'll get people with herniated discs with no symptoms and people with clean MRIs in pain. And of course, people experiencing pain that the MRI finds the cause of. It's also possible to have two sources of pain. It could be DOMS plus a herniated disc. I'm mostly pointing this out because "back pain" has scary connotations, any sort of pain gets them worried, even if it's just DOMS.

It’s a inflamed joint creating sciatic nerve ‘irritation’ and Some disc compression.

And some DOMS :)

Re: The gap between how old you are and how old you think you are

#188

Post by Aeolun »

p1esk wrote: post #145
Aeolun wrote: post #113

Earlier quoted context omitted.

In my personal experience working with Kotlin saves you half the time on typing alone.

Typing code is probably less than 5% of my daily time as a SWE.

That is probably true, but that 5% is responsible for 50% of the daily frustration. Certainly when working in plain Java.

Re: The gap between how old you are and how old you think you are

#189

Post by foobiekr »

simonblack wrote: post #91
foobiekr wrote: post #29

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Same. Once I started seriously considering retirement, admittedly a bit early-ish relative to the usual 65-70, the internal mental model of self has started to shift pretty dramatically, and the hypothetical "I have a lot of things i want to do" plans for the future now have the annotation "and a lot of them need to be done while I am still relatively young enough for them to be plausible." That has honestly shifted…

"I have a lot of things i want to do and a lot of them need to be done while I am still relatively young enough for them to be plausible." Do those things that are 'on your list' as soon as possible. There is an old saying 'Life is what happens while you're making other plans'. I discovered that I had, in practice, a mere six (6!) years in retrospect where it was possible do do things that were 'on MY list. If you mi…

I hear you, and I give the same advice. However, there are always things that you want to do that are time intensive, which is hard.

Re: The gap between how old you are and how old you think you are

#190

Post by crdrost »

brailsafe wrote: post #146
crdrost wrote: post #32

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Jukebox the Ghost in 2012, In my lungs I still feel young But my body won't play along I'm thinking this must not be where we Belong. Alan Kay was talking somewhere, but I don't have the link, about how a lot of his success in his youth had to do with the research community around him, and I think he was asked a question about how that sort of thing changes as you grow older... He replied that the combination of grow…

Having ADHD, I definitely feel more like your older colleagues now compared to how I felt in my early 20s before I'd burnt myself out just trying to do regular tasks efficiently. I'm interested in learning anything novel under two conditions, which are that results are potentially better in some way, and that the study time is paid for. If a new project arbitrarily wanted me to learn Kotlin in my personal time out of…

Thanks for sharing, it is especially helpful for me to get a perspective from someone who actually has ADHD!

I definitely thought personally that Kotlin had some big advantages.

• The most common comment on a pull request was asking people to remember to “@NonNull all the things!” so Kotlin’s non-null by default aspects seemed wonderful.

• Maybe the second most common comment on a pull request was to replace “==” with Objects.equals(x, y), Kotlin just has a sane ==. Note that Objects.equals() is the correct choice because y.equals(x) is “safe” but unfortunately written Yoda-style whereas x.equals(y) causes null pointer exceptions (the x usually comes from a getter which is null-tolerant).

• Kotlin had immutable records by default which made tests automatically more readable.

• The ability to mix declarations for functions and data structures etc in one file, allowed for much less jumping between files. Meanwhile, the lighter syntax meant that the code in those files took up a lot less visual space, so these files were not overwhelming...

So to your point it definitely “felt better to use and gave me more of my time back”, I felt, otherwise I would not have pushed for it.

And yes I agree the time to learn the language should all be accounted for in development hours, not some weekend homework project, and I would definitely validate your skepticism about the dangers about caring for the company more than it cares about you.

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